


Your Coffin Or Mine

by butimbroken, Scribes1015



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:54:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 75,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24665695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butimbroken/pseuds/butimbroken, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scribes1015/pseuds/Scribes1015
Summary: A night of terror forever created a bond between two strangers.
Relationships: Angel/Buffy Summers
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Chapter 1

Angel let out a deep breath as Cordelia's little introduction about her history and then talking a little about him ended and he started to make his way up the three small stairs at the back of the stage and he walked out toward her. She gave him an encouraging smile and put her hand on his forearm for just a moment before she was walking off in the other direction and it was just him.

The lights dimmed as he stood there, trying to gather his thoughts. He swallowed and nervously touched at the little microphone ear piece thing they'd given him earlier. He rubbed his hands together and and finally spoke. "Hello," he greeted the room, thankful for the room darkening a little, thankful that he wasn't full on bouncing off the walls as he spoke. "My name is Angel Chase, Cordelia there is my younger, pain in the ass sister. And she invited me rather out of the blue to come here today. And I didn't even know why she did until yesterday."

Angel let his hands fall to his sides and he began to walk slowly around the small wooden stage. "If you knew my sister when she was younger you might be surprised by some of the things she's accomplished in her life. Young Cordelia Chase is not someone you'd automatically think of as someone who wanted to help others. That may sound harsh, but it's true," he said with a nervous laugh at the end. "But near the end of her high school career some of her world shifted... which she spoke about earlier. A boyfriend she had started changing his own self, slowly got more possessive, made her feel bad about herself. Eventually she ended it and he had a hard time accepting that. She was scared, especially after that night she described to you all and she really closed herself up for awhile after that. Until she finally began opening up to someone, and they directed her toward the idea of wanting to help others, other men and women, children, who may be in situations like this."

Angel stopped once he reached the end of the length of the stage for a moment. "My sister volunteered anywhere where someone would have her pretty much. She set up a program at the high school, reached out to other schools in neighboring towns to do the same, she wound up working with two of these organizations since high school. This one who helped set all of this up today was actually the first one she was with, then she came back after about a year. And she loves it. She doesn't love that these types of places have to exist. I can't even begin to count the times she's called me hysterically crying over things she's seen or stories she listened to that day, crying over the evils of this world, wishing she could do so much more... but she loves that every day she tries, she's there, she gives hope to people."

Angel rubbed his hands again as he started walking the other way down the stage. "I've offered to help many, many times, my sister has asked me to in a wide variety of ways. I have donated money, I have used contacts that I have in my own line of work to help get people to these events or to donate something towards helping the cause, I have been a temporary guardian of a child for her once, I have driven hundreds of miles to collect women who have called my sister for help, I've set up stages, booths, handed out papers, taken names and information, and that list goes on and on. My sister calls and almost always I'm like, okay, what do you need? And... Cordy has asked me to to speak to people before, she's gotten me up on stages... but it's always been I was a game show host for a silly thing she was doing, or I was at the end of the conversation begging people to reach out for help if they needed it, or I had a speech that she had me memorize. That was it. She's never once asked me to talk about something personal or something that happened in my own life."

Angel's eyes scanned the crowd without really looking at any of them. "Cordelia called me up the other day and she told me and that something had happened in a little town and she was taking a small team and she just kind of rambled on. She asked if I could come and I actually told her I couldn't, I said I could in other ways if she needed me to but I was supposed to be leaving that next day for a week long business trip. Cordelia got real quiet, then she hung up on me. And it was weird. She called me back maybe fifteen minutes later and she was real quiet still, and she asked me to come again, and she said that she wanted me to talk about what happened. How she said that phrase made me understand without question what she was referring to. And then it was my turn to get quiet because not once has she ever asked me to. Not like this on some stage in front of strangers, not in more private settings with people to try and get them to open up, hell I think she and I have talked about these events maybe once or twice and otherwise we skirt the hell around it."

Angel walked back to the center of the stage and sat down on the edge, his legs hanging off the front. "I wound up coming out here, and I spent yesterday helping set up and doing random things for people, but I was still confused as to why she thought I wanted to this right here. And I made it clear I didn't want to and she still wouldn't answer me about why she had even asked me. Then, late yesterday evening I saw it on the news. I saw what brought my sister here, what tragedy happened in your little town. I saw the face of the young blonde woman who was attacked... and I began searching online for more information about what happened to her... and... I understood."

Angel let silence fall over the room for a moment. "Two years ago, I was in another part of this state. I went with my sister and her boyfriend at the time to this girls' house, I'd never met her, it was her birthday and there was some big party being set up for her at a club in town that somehow I wound up being invited to. They were stopping in to drag out some time while final decorations or whatever were being handled and then they were going to suggest she go to the club pretty much. We were there maybe five minutes when the young man my sister was dating got a phone call, and it was another few minutes before my sister was whispering harshly at me that she needed to go take care of a cake situation and I needed to stay here and distract this lady I didn't know."

Angel sighed. "This young woman reminds me a lot of the one your community lost. She was young and full of life, she was happy, she was blonde even, similar body types, big innocent eyes, the whole deal. I was left there alone with her at her house, it was awkward, I told her Happy Birthday and just tried to make small talk. I remember her saying she was going to the kitchen to grab something but for the life of me I don't remember what or why. I don't remember what I said that made her laugh. I remember smiling at the sound, I remember looking around to the other side of her house. I remember what that laughter sounded like as it died in her throat and the one that took it over. I remember the sound of her being punched - twice - and it was the two loudest hits I'd ever heard in my life. I ran as fast as my legs would carry me and I jumped on him. I had never seen this man in my life, all I knew was that he was here to hurt this girl. I grabbed the hand that held a gun with one of my hands and the other kept hitting him as I yelled at the young blonde to get out, to run, to go get help. With that small distraction a shot was fired, recklessly. It barely grazed me. He tried again before I could get control and it went even more wildly, the bullet hit the wall behind me. I got the gun away from him for awhile and we fought hard... he wound up with the gun once more."

Angel's hand moved to his abdomen on instinct. "We were both standing, I was trying to quickly come up with my next move, and while looking right at me another shot was fired, his final bullet he had on him at that, before I could do make my brain or my body do anything. I was hit mid abdomen, just below my sternum. Time seemed to slow down around me, I knew that I was going die in my head. He stared at me for a long moment before he took off running. I managed to get my shirt off and I tried to cover the wound as I laid myself down, trying to mentally prepare for death to overtake me. I wondered why this all even happened. I thought of my family, tried to make amends mentally for all the wrongs I know I had done in my life. It felt like an eternity but in reality I think it was close to ten minutes before the police arrived. I was in and out of it but I remember when I saw those flashing lights, how I tried to scream out for help but I couldn't because I was drowning in the blood filling my lungs. I barely made out the first officer coming inside... and it's still like random flashes of memories when I looked back. Words said, I remember him rushing toward me, I was asked how many times I had been shot and my hands shook as I held up two fingers. They told me they had someone in custody and asked if I knew the person who shot me. I tried shaking my head that I didn't, I'm not sure how well that came out. An ambulance came, oxygen was put on me. I was on a stretcher. I was taken to an airport and we waited for my transport. I don't remember when it arrived or the next many days of my life."

Angel pulled his feet up into a criss cross seating position and sighed once more. "I came out of the coma seven days later. The seventh day was still pretty much a blur, I could see shadows and hear muffled voices but I couldn't make anyone out really. That, at times, made me want to panic so I just tried to sleep and escape. The next day, the eighth day of being in the hospital, I woke up again and I could open my eyes more and I could see clearer. And the first thing that I saw... was that girl."

Fighting off the urge to shake, Angel moved his hands a little and tried to push down the anxiety building up right now. "That young woman was standing beside my bed.. and nearly her entire face was covered in bandages. Bloody bandages at that. And in that moment I realized that I hadn't even saved her, that she had not been able to get away from whoever in the hell that man was unhurt. And I never felt worse in my life. Later, I would learn more details about what happened. I would learn that the man who attacked us was an ex-boyfriend of hers who had been stalking her and threatening her for some time by that point. I would learn he had a history of violence, a history of drug use. I would learn that she tried three different houses before someone answered and she begged for help, and yet he tracked her down, dragged her out of the house. She would get away again and go into hiding, she was found yet again, that she fought with all she had and he still overpowered her. I would learn that he bashed her face in with the stock of the gun he shot me with, that he'd came there to kill her with. He hit her so hard the left side of her face had shattered bones, her teeth broke, the stock of the gun itself broke from the force he was attacking her with. Bits of the gun had to be removed from her. He attempted to use a large piece of the broken weapon to carve into her face. The police, when they found him, said he was laughing hysterically. He claimed he was going to carve his initials into her face so she knew who she belonged to, so everyone would always know. He laughed at her as he hit her telling her no one would ever care about her now. At the time I first saw her again, I didn't know any of this and I was in tears, I began to hyperventilate as she thanked me. She thanked me for saving her life, for being her hero. And I hated it. I was so glad she was alive, but I felt like I failed her. And it wasn't some make it all about me situation I promise, it was literally just me hating that someone had done this. Hating that I or someone else couldn't have stopped such a senseless act. I didn't feel like a hero, I wasn't trying to be a hero, I still hate that whole thing. I wasn't a hero. I'm not one. I had a fight or flight moment and I didn't want a young woman to die. I didn't want her to get hurt."

Continuing, "I was on life support for two more weeks. And it was frustrating. It was hard. I couldn't speak, I couldn't communicate really with anyone around me. The ventilator was a nightmare all in itself. I couldn't answer questions or ask them, I couldn't tell that girl I was sorry, I couldn't tell people that I would sometimes begin to drift off and be overtaken with nightmares of a large figure standing over my bed to finish the job of killing me, or, hell, I couldn't tell someone that my foot itched. I couldn't ask how bad I really was, what the extent of damage I had from that night. It wasn't until I could remain awake and coherent for a handful of hours at a time that people really began telling me anything. They told me bits at a time about all that had happened, about the guy, what happened to that girl, how bad off I was. I had one of my kidneys removed, my spleen, my gallbladder, and also a small section of my liver were all removed. My stomach had to have several surgeries done to attempt to repair it, same with my intestines and pancreas. I had forty six units of blood transferred to me, twenty six of plasma, and a long list of other fluids that made me swell up for about a week. Then, another week and a half later I lost that extra weight but also I lost another thirty pounds because of... well... being in bed, not being able to even roll over, not being able to eat besides my feeding tube which couldn't even give me a full meal at this point either, stress, the surgery... I looked kind of scary. It was weeks before someone wanted me to try and walk. And I couldn't. I was in pain, my muscles weren't working like they were supposed to now. They wanted me to use a walker and I refused, in my head I thought that is ridiculous, I'm a strong guy, I don't need a walker. And I collapsed on my first step."

Hearing Cordelia cough, his head turned to find her way off the side, off the stage, back where he was standing before he came out here. She looked like she was trying not to cry already. "I pretty much had to learn basic things all over again. I had to learn how to walk again, how to feed myself, how to sit up for long periods of time... just... so much. I spent a very long time in the hospital unit, I had to go through endless months of physical therapy, I had in home nursing set up to deal with the wound I was left with. I had to fight every day, I had to regain all my strength, I had to get my head right, too. I wasn't myself for awhile. It took seven months to be considered healed, recovered... but the head's a funny thing. There had been a fundraising page and dozens of events for that young lady and for me as well, she didn't have insurance so people gathered to try and help. I didn't take any of it. I saw her a handful of times while I was still in the hospital, she had many surgeries of her own she had to go through. I found myself distancing myself from her which I hope she didn't take in the wrong way. I was later told that she healed up nicely as well, she has scars just like me, she had teeth replaced, she had tried just... doing like me I guess and just taking life day to day. I think about her a lot. I think about how scared she must have been, I fear for what all would have happened if I hadn't been there by chance, I worry she's carrying it around and is afraid. I think about the idea of going to her sometimes, apologizing for... all of it. Telling her how sorry I am I couldn't keep her safe like I thought I had or how I tried to, that I am sorry she ever had to deal with something like that. Try and find someway to help I guess."

"It was six months and twenty days before he was officially sentenced. He plead guilty to attempted capital murder charges. He was sentenced to two thirty-five year terms, one for me, one for her. That was a huge relief to me, it made a lot of what happened kind of feel like it came to a close, like it was a good moment to start moving on toward the future. But I'm alive. That young woman is alive. Your community was sadly not spared this loss, the one of that young woman and of her friend... and my heart goes out to her wherever she landed after this life. My heart goes out to her family, to the family of her friend who lost his life as well to this unspeakable act. My heart goes out to friends, to... to everyone. Even if you didn't know this woman... you heard it maybe, you felt some connection some how or another... my thoughts are with you. I've heard the stories on the news, read comments online, so many people looking back and ignoring signs, keeping a distance, how she reached out for help and didn't seem to get any. A big part of me wants to be angry about that, but I'm not here for that, and it doesn't help for me to be up here preaching any of that. I just wanted to tell my story. I just wanted to be able to connect to you all maybe. And to reach out and say that there are men and women being killed and, or hurt daily because of situations like this. Because of domestic violence, abuse. If you are going through something like this and you need someone to talk to, please do. There are so many resources. If you are worried about someone, reach out the best you can, help them if you can. Keep yourself safe, please, but take care of one another. Do not become a statistic, do not let someone you love and care about become another one. You're more important than you realize. You are stronger than you realize. That young woman shouldn't have lost her life. The one from my story shouldn't have come so close to losing hers. Be the change, help change, something..."

Angel recited some organizations, phone numbers and websites, gave advice on how to reach out locally and nationwide, and decided he had enough of the spotlight so thanked everyone for their time.

OoOoO

It was much later in the evening when Buffy Summers found herself standing in front a large hotel room door. She thought about knocking, she thought about running back down the hall... but she looked down at the envelopes in her hands one more time. She swallowed, smoothed out the bright green post it note that was stuck to the top one before kneeling down lower to the floor.

Swallowing hard, she slipped the first envelope with the note attached through the small crack between the floor and the heavy door. One at a time, she eventually got all three enveloped to the other side before standing. She wiped at her pants, accepted those letters she'd been carrying around in her car were out of her hands now, waited another few seconds to see if anything happened... then turned to walk back down the large hallway.

Buffy found herself thankful for the downpour as once she returned back to her car she had a hard time keeping it together. Today had been long, the past several days had been long...

Her hand flew to her chest, toying with the necklace as she opened her glove box and for the first time in years found it without those letters she'd left for him, for Angel Chase. Part of her found it freeing, part of her wanted to panic.

Buffy could still feel the pen in her hand, shaking, hurting, bloody as she'd written that first letter. She had been told she could home and recovery didn't require her to be at the hospital any longer. And she had cried hysterically in that hospital bed trying to write words, to express how she felt, how sorry she was, how thankful she was to the stranger who'd saved her life. She had meant to give it to him before she left, but it hadn't felt right... he wasn't okay, he wasn't going home and wouldn't for weeks after she had, and he always seemed worse when she was even around. She didn't even know if he would want to hear anything from her.

So, she'd taken it home. She'd set it aside until he got released. She put it in an envelope, put it in her car and waited to be brave enough to send it. And then a year passed, and she found herself writing a second one and hiding it away in her car with the other. Then a second year passed... and another letter drove around with her. She'd managed into a post office with them this year, but she'd chickened out right before dropping them in.

She wasn't sure why she was so scared to send them, why it was making her want to panic right now, but it was there.

Buffy sat in the car until it passed and she managed to drive a few streets back over to the hotel she had been staying in the past several days. She too had found herself coming to this small Northern town after hearing the news one late evening. She had dropped a bowl of cereal walking from the kitchen to the living room as it played on the screen, striking her harder than a single other story she'd heard that resembled her own in any way.

Much like Angel had talked about in the speech he'd given while she hid in the very back row... she wasn't lost on the similarities, how close in age and looks they were, how she had an ex-fiance who couldn't just accept that she had enough of him and his behavior and wanted to move on with her life. It wasn't the first time she'd played the "what if" game... wondering what exactly would have happened if she'd made any other choice that day, if she hadn't been home, if she had been there alone... she'd wondered many times about what if what happened to this other girl would have been how her own story played out. What if Angel hadn't been able to fight him off, if he had been blindsided like the young man who lost his life had, if he hadn't been stronger... She'd had more than one nightmare since coming here of Angel and her in the place of those two, lying dead, gone...

Most people around her own small town of Sunnydale knew what happened to her, she'd talked about it, answered questions, hell people spread the truth and made up their own version enough times as well. She found she didn't really like talking about it with strangers, like too many people already knew so much of this event it felt nice to not always have everyone know. She still reached out to people in need in other ways, she just didn't like the spotlight.

She'd come here though and she'd talked with some of the family after privately reaching out. She'd tried to help out with the small community who were in a state of shock. And then... she heard about Cordelia being here, and not long after that he was here, too. It was like another one of those random works of fate that you either chalked up to nothing or you figured it had to mean something, somehow... and probably never understand why.

Her throat wanted to close up even seeing Cordelia, then when he came out it was like the room started to spin. Her lips curled into a smile at all the right times, her heart ached right along with him as together in their own way they relieved that night, she fought the urge to flee the room to make it stop.

OoOoO

Buffy was just about to fall asleep when her phone rang. Her head lifted up off the pillow and her arm shot out to the bright light filling the space around the bedside table and she quickly answered the call from the unfamiliar number. When no one answered she repeated her "hello?"

"Um... hi. Buffy. It's-"

"I know," she cut him off. Even if she hadn't sat in the back corner today she was sure she'd know his voice anywhere, it was forever etched into her memory.

"Right," he answered. "I know it's late and I'm sorry for that..."

"It's okay. I was awake." She was trying to drift off to sleep but it was true, she was awake. Still thinking about the past, of today, of the long gone letters, wondering if he would take up on her offer to call or come see her with the information she'd left on the neon sticky note. Not to mention she had trouble actually falling asleep no matter how tired she was most nights anyhow.

"It's late," he repeated and nervously asked if she might want to see him tomorrow for coffee or lunch or something.

Buffy glanced at the clock also on the little nightstand and knew with the adrenaline coursing through her now with even talking to him over a phone she wasn't going to be back down anytime soon. "Are you busy right now? I mean, if you're tired I understand... I just... I thought maybe we could talk now if you're up for it?"

He was silent and she started to feel nervous. She was about to say something when his voice came back on, nearly making her jump.


	2. Chapter Two

Angel wound up texting her before he arrived at her hotel, again seconds before she heard the knock, and he announced who it was after his hand finished tapping on the heavy door. Only for a split second did she feel that random bout of fear that would pop up and strike out of nowhere, then she reminded herself it was only him and she hurried to hop off the side of the bed and hurry over to let him in. 

The door opened and there he stood. 

Earlier, when she had sat in the shadows and watched him up on that stage, she couldn't help but notice how her memories of him did a pretty damn good job but they fell short all the same of painting the full picture of the man who's saved her life three years ago. And now, as he stood right in front of her that only rang more true. 

It wasn't as if they had spent much time together that tragic night but she remembered her heart racing when she'd first saw him and how it hadn't stopped until everything went to hell in a hand basket. He was unnaturally gorgeous back then, and it wasn't as if the past three years had done much to sway that. The last time she had actually seen him however was a very different man.

"Hi," he greeted. Then he held up a pizza box and shrugged. "I couldn't really eat earlier... and then I was starving... so I got a pizza. Is that okay? I am more than happy to share if you want some."

Buffy smiled a little, nodding her head before taking a few steps back to let him into the room. "That's fine," she rushed out. "I, uh, I have some extra plates and some stuff over here," she began and walked over to the little island in the room that held a space for the microwave and nervously opened the small cabinet door to pull out a bag of extra paper plates, napkins, and other related items. 

He thanked her as she handed the bag over and told him he could sit everything down, plus himself, anywhere he wanted. 

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

'Funny, I was thinking the same thing,' Buffy said in her head as she found herself staring more at the very tall man before her. "Anywhere's fine," she repeated and she swallowed as she watched him walk over to the small table in the corner and eased the pizza box onto it before making them both a plate. She told him he could grab something to drink out of the mini fridge as well after he brought hers over. 

He nodded, his dark eyes locking with hers or a few long seconds before he went back to the table and took a seat while she returned to the edge of the bed she'd been staying in since arriving in town. She started to comment on how she was sorry everything felt awkward but he cut her off. 

"I don't think there'd be much way around it," he responded.

Buffy nodded, taking a small bite of her pizza before briefly touching on how she'd come to town and mentioning that she had seen him today, on stage, as he gave that speech

"You were there? I thought maybe you were after I saw those letters but..."

"Yeah, I sat as far back as I could and just... listened. Relived it kind of along with you."

"I'm sorry. I would have handled everything different had I known..."

"It's fine. It's what happened, as much as I would like to forget it... and it felt oddly comforting at times because it wasn't just me, in my head, or trying to explain it to someone. I don't have to with you. I thought you were brave... I was just surprised you were even here. Plus it reminded me even more of how lucky I was to have survived that night... because of you."

Angel ran a hand down his face and she looked back down at her food. "I heard what you said about how you felt because you weren't able to keep me completely safe from being hurt and it broke my heart. You saved my life, you nearly died doing that... that's more than many people would have done. I just really felt the urge to reach out to you all the more after that. I wanted you to know that I was okay - more or less - and that I truly am thankful for you saving my life. I don't want you to carry that weight around."

He was silent for a long time then sighed. "I think a lot about things I could have done differently, should have done. I hate that you got hurt."

"You jumped in on a situation that no one was prepared for, that you weren't a part of. You fought a mad man with a gun all in order to protect someone you had literally just met, and were left bleeding to death because of it. You did plenty, you did more than enough. I can't tell you all the what could have beens. I think about them all the time, too... but I usually go in a darker direction and think of what could have gone worse. And that just makes me thankful that I lived at all."

They seemed to both know they could go around in circles on this all night so that part of the conversation seemed to drop off to the side after that point, with one more apology from him before he changed the subject to asking about various things she had done since that night of horrors.

OoOoO

Hours seemed to pass like they were nothing, while he'd been a nervous wreck coming over here and things had started off awkward and rocky, soon they were talking all night as if they'd known one another their whole lives. They talked about what happened some, but mostly they just got to really know one another outside of what had happened that night. They discussed music, movies, their favorite television shows and books, jobs, their childhoods, their families... 

They'd tried watching the news but when some family members of the man who killed the girl in town came on they both had no interest in watching. Buffy had gotten real quiet and asked him if he wanted to know anything about the man who's turned their lives upside down and he had shook his head, shutting that idea down. There wasn't some explanation he needed from her about who he was, who he was to her, why he was there, what had happened in their relationship. If she truly wanted to tell him he would sit and listen but he knew the basics and didn't need anything more. He'd had a mother reach out to him, begging him to listen and he just hadn't had it in him. He was sure it made her feel better to think of all the ways she loved him, all his good qualities, but for Angel none of that mattered. It didn't help him to remember this was a "human" who had made a long series of bad choices. He just didn't care.

He and Buffy sat on the bed together watching something else, they played silly songs and videos on their phones for one another, talked, shared photos, and just enjoyed their little bubble until he could see the first hints of sunlight peeking through her blinds. He couldn't believe he'd actually stayed here the entire night, that hadn't quite been the plan but he had to admit he'd enjoyed it.

She yawned for about the sixth time in recent moments and he smiled a little at her. "I should probably go," he told her and didn't miss that hint of sadness that clouded in her eyes. "I'm supposed to meet my sister for breakfast and then I'll probably need to catch at least a couple hours of sleep if I can."

"I think it's easier in the day. Especially when I'm alone... the light isn't as scary, doesn't bring the memories out to play as much."

He understood all too well. 

"Thank you for coming. I'm sure I'm not the first person you would have chosen to spend a couple hours with given how well mere minutes around me worked out before."

His lips turned up a little. "There's no where else I think I would have rather been." Angel found himself staring at her, he too thought of how alive she seemed right there in front of him as opposed to those flashes of memories from that fateful night. She looked just as beautiful, but weathered. Her cheek, her smile was different now... he'd left damage in an indention there. He was sure people didn't notice if they didn't know her and what happened but she would always have to see it in every picture since, every time she looked at her reflection. 

He had a scar taking up most of his midsection but he could avoid looking it at most of the time. No one had to know anything was wrong. 

His heart hurt as her green eyes started filling with tears and he didn't hesitate to pull her to him. "I'm sorry this ever happened." Her head shook and she hugged him tighter. "I wish you and I had met and gotten to know one another under different circumstances and I'm sorry I never reached out to you before. It crossed my mind a million times to..."

"For me, too, Angel. It's a little hard to find the right words for someone who saved your life, though. But with that first step taken it kind of feels like I can breathe, you know. And I kind of hope this isn't just for tonight... maybe we could talk again later, you know after we get some much needed sleep maybe we could go for that cup of coffee or something." 

Releasing his hold on her, he watched as she took a small step back. Looking back down into her mossy green eyes, he lost himself for just a second in their swirly depths, she was even more beautiful than he'd remembered. "Absolutely, I'm here for another couple of days anyway. Why don't you call me this evening after you've woken up?" 

Nodding her head, she couldn't believe it was really already daylight outside, "Goodnight," she joked, walking him the small distance to the hotel door. 

"Goodnight, Buffy," he'd whispered gently, stopping to face her one last time. They both chuckled at the unexpected awkwardness that had suddenly seemed to return between them, they embraced one more quick time, before he made her promise to keep her word about the coffee later. Watching him leave she waited until he stepped onto the elevator to shut her door. Biting her lip in an attempt to keep from smiling, she just knew there was no way she was going to be able to fall asleep, for the first time in almost longer than she could remember, she truly felt a sense of peace. 

OoOoO

There was a lightness within him as he made his way back to breakfast. He couldn't believe she had been there the entire time, he couldn't believe how truly grateful she seemed, it was strange hearing things from her perspective. For so long now he had beat himself up for not being able to do more to help the poor girl, yet all she ever seemed to be was thankful. After he had first read those letters, he'd been terrified to contact her, not having the first clue what he would say or what she might say. He'd debated with himself for the better part of an hour, punching in the phone number from her last letter, only to delete it and start all over again. Hell even after she had answered the phone, he'd contemplated just hanging up for a few seconds. 

Though he had to admit that he was glad he went. It was nice to meet the girl who had very much been a part of the worst night of his life, the girl who he had spent countless hours, days, hell possibly even weeks thinking of. Wondering where she was, how she was doing, it was nice to know despite his own grievances, she didn't hold any ill will towards him. In a lot of ways she seemed to be coping better than he had been all these years, and judging by his speech to all of those domestic violence victims earlier, it was a little more than ironic. 

There just seemed to be a brightness about Buffy Summers, despite her dark past, that shined through, seeping into all those around here. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd stayed up talking to someone all night, well unless you considered his multitude of one night stands… and they hadn't exactly spent their time talking. 

A part of him wanted to skip out on breakfast with Cordy, but he already knew that he would never hear the end of it. Pulling into the little cafe they were supposed to meet at, he quickly spotted his sister's car, he was only running a few minutes late, hopefully she wouldn't grill him too much about his absence from the hotel. Unfortunately they had conjoining rooms, and knowing Cordy she had burst in at the first light of dawn to wake him up. Not for the first time, he found himself wishing Lindsey had been able to get off work for this trip. At least when he was around, Cordy's attention stayed focused on him… well mostly anyway.

OoOoO

"So you mean to tell me she was there the whole time, and didn't even say anything?" Angel just nodded his head as he used his fork to slice through his eggs. 

Cordy's eyes were wide in disbelief, when she'd accused her brother of blowing off their breakfast date for one of his bimbos, the last thing she had expected was for him to say he'd spent the night with Buffy Summers. "And you didn't do  _ anything _ ??? Y'all just talked, all night, alone, in her hotel?"

Rolling his eyes, he wasn't sure what was so hard for her to comprehend, it wasn't like he had sex with every girl he met. "Nothing happened Cordelia, we talked, that's it. We went through a terrible experience together, I don't get what's so hard to understand." 

"Uh-huh. So let me get this straight, this  _ girl _ slips you letters under your hotel room door, you call her, show up to her hotel with pizza, and then y'all spend the entire night swapping life stories and laughing at tiger memes on facebook…  _ Who are you?"  _

Angel sighed again, he wished he could fault her for her train of thought, but she knew him better than anyone, and she was right this definitely wasn't his normal m.o.. "Look Cordy, she's not just some random girl that I met at a bar, or one of your flaky ass girlfriends that constantly throw themselves at me… She's, I don't know, she's just Buffy." 

She couldn't believe her ears, if she didn't know any better than she might dare to say that Angel liked this chick. Taking another sip of her mimosa, she tried to play it casual as she continued to grill him. "So do you have plans to see her again?"

Had he noticed the gleam in her eye then he probably would have known to deflect her question, but as it were he was too busy buttering his toast to notice. "Ya, were supposed to meet for coffee sometime tonight."

"OH MY GOD," she all but shrieked, causing Angel to jump so hard his knee banged up against the table it was under. "You like her! You really like her." 

Staring at her as though she'd grown two heads, he gently sat his coffee back down. This was not a thought that Cordy needed to have in her head, "Don't start okay, I don't like her, not like that. She's a beautiful girl, but I'm not exactly the relationship type of guy, and I would never, I could never just use her like that. Not with our past." 

Thankfully Cordy hadn't pushed the subject any further, eventually letting the matter go all together. Though he knew his sister, and he could already see the wheels spinning behind those dark brown eyes of hers. He was sure that before she could even make it out of the parking lot, she would have Lindsey on the phone reciting their entire conversation. Ever since they got together a couple years back they had both been on his ass to settle down, constantly cracking jokes about how they couldn't believe he hadn't already contracted syphilis or trying to guess how many little Angel's could be out there running around without their knowledge… which the answer to that was a big fat zero. He wasn't an idiot, he may sleep around but he prided himself on protection, in all of his years he'd never had sex without a condom. 

Angel was just finishing getting buckled into his car when suddenly Cordy was knocking on the window. He groaned as he rolled it down, afraid that perhaps she wasn't as over the conversation as he was hoping. 

"I'm glad that you saw Buffy."

Angel nodded. "Yeah, me, too. It felt like at least some of the weight of what happened lessened a little just talking to her. I like knowing she's okay, seeing it first hand."

"As okay as can be expected anyhow. Much like someone else I happen to know."

"Yeah."

"You two joined a club which neither of you asked to join... I think it's good for both of you to talk about it, and to talk about.. literally anything, just with one another. I really do. And, I mean, I didn't know her all that well but I did always kind of like Buffy."

Ha laughed at the little change in her voice there at the end. "Okay, Cordy. I'm about to be considered dead on my feet here, so I'm going to go back to the hotel and try and sleep now."

"Mmhmm. Well, I have a busy morning and afternoon ahead of me but I will be checking in."

"Yeah, yeah. I know." Cordelia might not have been at the house when everything went down, but she'd had her own demons from that night. She'd always feel guilty for having left those minutes before despite how many times he'd assured her that it was okay, she hadn't known, and how everything would have been worse had it been her who had stayed, or if she had stayed along with him that night. Cordy hated leaving him, even now, she'd get this fleeting look of panic every time so he was used to the endless text messages, calls, random pop ins when she wasn't working. His parents were almost as bad, too, though they'd all slightly eased up the more time went on. 

OoOoO

As he got back to his room, Angel headed to the bathroom to wash his face, brush his teeth and attempt to relax enough that when he laid down maybe it wouldn't take forever for sleep to come. Stripping down to nothing but his boxers, his shirt came off last and he stared at himself in the mirror, his eyes trailing the biggest of his battle wounds from that evening, the trail that ran from his sternum to the top of his pelvic bone. It wasn't pretty and it never was going to be, but he worked hard with surgeries, with physical therapists to try and get his body back to as normal as it was going to be. 

His fingers followed the trail, the slight turns it made, past where it pulled his belly button crooked, down the end. 

It looked like he'd been branded, and he figured he pretty much had been. 

With a loud sigh, he flicked the light off and went back out toward the bed. He plugged his phone into the charger, sent Cordy a text messages before sending one to Buffy as well just saying he hoped she was able to get some sleep in, before he crawled under the large comforter and tried to shut his mind off.


	3. Chapter Three

Buffy felt the edges of her brain starting to wake up and tried to push them all away. She started to drift back into an old memory of a summer past and days on the beach... 

There seemed to be a bout of nothingness after that, then... then she was in a panic, everything around her seemed too quiet, the blood pounding in her ears, the sound of her heavy breathing seemed deafening as she ran. She tripped, running through a yard of one of her neighbors, but not enough to actually fall down. She wanted to scream as she began frantically knocking, whispering pleas that someone would just answer the door, but she didn't want him to hear her. She didn't know if he was following, if he was looking for her, if he was still back at her house... No one answered and she darted off to the next house, feeling more panicked as no one seemed to be home here either. Her eyes scanned the street for any signs of life before she took off as fast as she could to one at the corner. 

Her hand hurt she pounded so hard. The porch light was on, she had just seen someone come inside with a dog... they had to answer, they had to help she'd thought. 

When the door open she basically bum rushed her way inside as she frantically began telling the elderly man that she needed help, she needed the police, that there was a man inside of her house. He'd gotten a few quick questions out as he'd called the police and when he assured her they were on the way she almost felt a sense of peace... but it didn't last long. She'd turned her head just in time to lock with his as he stood searching the street for any sign of her. She screamed as he came running toward the house, nearly ripping the screen door off and chasing her the short distance she'd made it deeper into the house. 

She screamed so loud her throat hurt as his hands held her, dragging her out of the man's house. The tiny dog came running after them, biting at his ankles and gave her enough distraction, along with a few blows she managed to throw in, to get away. She ran in zig-zags through yards, around people's houses, until ducking behind someone's garage. She'd prayed so hard he wouldn't find her, that the police would drive by now, now, now... But they didn't come in time, and he did find her again. 

His face was wild as he picked her up and slammed her back down to the ground before jumping on her. He screamed in her face. She had never been hit in her life before tonight but she wasn't some weakling either and she tried and tried to fight him off of her. She used everything she had but he was too much, he continued to scream, his head pounded into her, his fist connected time and time again, he started hitting her with the gun and all she could see was bright white lights as pain shot through her. 

She could feel as the bones shattered, as her teeth cracked and broke, as blood pooled in her mouth, oozed out of her. She coughed, sure she was going to choke to death of everything gathering in the back of her throat. She cried, pleaded with him to stop and it only enraged him more. 

Buffy shot up in the bed as the memories of that night started to fade and she gathered she wasn't in that night right now, she wasn't outside about to pray for death to just take her so the pain would stop. Her heart raced as she tried to remind herself that she was okay, she was safe, she was alive. He was in jail, he couldn't hurt her ever again. 

OoOoO

Angel shot up out of bed gasping, bullets of sweat rolling down his body. He didn't have the nightmares every night anymore, but they still plagued him from time to time. This one had been exceptionally bad, the vague images of the blonde named Buffy, now replaced with crisp, vivid images of the woman he'd spent the night with last night, who'd tried her best to persuade him that he had done all he could do that night… but apparently his subconscious had yet to get the memo. 

He'd showered, dressed, and ordered something small from room service all the while keeping a close eye on his phone. Ever since he shot out of bed, he'd been debating if she was really going to call, if he should call her, and if so what was the appropriate amount of time to wait before doing so. She hadn't responded to the text that he'd sent before passing out, but then again she could have already been asleep herself, he thought, attempting to reason with himself. Though if she had already been asleep then, she should be waking up soon. 

He'd just begun to contemplate whether or not he should surprise her with donuts at her hotel again, he saw a little shop on his way in this morning with a sign that read twenty-four hours, when the ringing from his phone shocked him so much that he'd nearly sent it flying through the air. 

"Hello," he answered, trying to sound as casual as possible. 

"Angel," he heard her question from the other side of the line. The thought of how much he liked the sound of his name coming from her lips flitted through his mind, but he quickly pushed it away, having no idea where it had come from.

"Were you expecting someone else," he chuckled, taking a seat on his hotel's bed. 

"I don't know, I mean it could of been your boyfriend," she joked on the other end of the line. 

"Boyfriend," he nearly choked on the word, surely he hadn't given her any indication that he was gay last night. It wasn't that he had a problem with any of that, he himself just definitely preferred women. 

"Angel breathe. I'm kidding," she assured him, still giggling from his reaction. "No, I just kind of didn't have the best night, or day, or, well you know what I mean. Anyways, I hope I didn't wake you or anything, I can definitely let you go, or call back later, or some-."

She was doing that cute ramble thing, he'd noticed her do last night whenever she was flustered. "You didn't wake me," he promised, interrupting her. "As a matter of fact, I was just thinking about calling you, but I wasn't sure if you'd still be sleeping." 

Sighing, she wished she'd been able to sleep that long. "Nope, like I said rough night."

"Ya, I know the feeling," he whispered into the phone, images of her broken and bleeding from his own nightmare, still fresh in his head. 

"I know we agreed on coffee, but I'm kind of starved, and since we're kind of doing this whole day backwards together, what with the staying up all night, and everything... well, I was kind of wondering if you wanted to have breakfast." There she finally gotten the words out, she'd only rehearsed that conversation in her head about a hundred times since she woke up. 

"Breakfast," he repeated. 

"Yep, IHOP… it's where the pancakes live."

Smiling, he couldn't help but chuckle at her use of language. He was quickly learning that Buffy Summers was definitely far from boring. "That sounds great, did you want me to pick you up or should we just meet there?" He had no idea why he'd offered to pick her up, though before he could even consider the question the words had already flown out of his mouth. Even stranger was the fact that he found himself hoping she would say yes. 

She really hated driving around cities that she wasn't familiar with, hell she didn't even like driving around Los Angeles, and being from Sunnydale, that was just impossible some of the time. "Are you sure you wouldn't mind, I wouldn't want you to have to go too far out of your or anything." Normally there was no way in hell she'd let some man she barely knew come pick her up for anything. But Angel wasn't just some guy, besides it wasn't like this was a date.

"It's not a problem Buffy, really." Glancing at his watch, he took note of the time, "How does seven o'clock sound?".

"Perfect," she exclaimed. 

An awkward silence fell between them as neither of them really wanted to be the first to say goodbye. "Seven it is then," Angel finally managed, not used to this anxious feeling in the pit of his stomach. 

"See you then," she'd barely whispered, before hanging up the phone. They were just going to eat, it wasn't a big deal, she had no idea what her feeling so damn flustered all of the sudden. 

OoOoO

As soon as she ended the call, Buffy had jumped from the bed, and headed straight to the shower. He would be here in just under an hour, which didn't leave her much time to shower and replace yesterday's makeup. She wasn't sure why she was looking forward to this so much, they were essentially strangers, but last night had been one of the best nights that she'd had in just about as long as she could remember, and the sad thing was they hadn't even done anything… not really. She'd enjoyed lounging about with him more than she had her last few spa dates with the girls, and that was saying something. 

Laughing to herself, she couldn't believe he had gotten so flustered earlier when she mentioned his boyfriend… she was going to have to remember to tease him about that later. 

It was nearly seven by the time she'd finished getting ready, she would have been done sooner, but she had tried on no less than six outfits. Just about everything that she had packed for this little trip, before deciding on her favorite jeans and a simple grey t-shirt from the last concert she went too. Taking one last look in the mirror, she quickly picked up all of her discarded clothes and stuffed them back into her suitcase. Pulling the comforter back up on her rented bed, she peered around the small hotel room, double checking that it looked at least a little presentable for when he arrived. 

OoOoO

Even though he had told her seven, he'd had little to keep him busy once they hung up the phone. Having already taken the time to get dressed earlier, he'd grabbed his keys and headed out the door without much thought. Yet when he pulled up to her Motel, he found himself second guessing his decision to just arrive so early unannounced. What if he knocked on her door, and she was in the shower, or in the middle of getting dressed. He certainly didn't want to create a situation that would make her uncomfortable, so he'd waited patiently in the parking lot, only half listening to the radio as he kept checking the time. Breathing out, he sent a quick text message checking in with his mom and dad, then answered Cordelia again who had been more than happy to tease him since he'd quickly knocked on her door to let her know he was heading out for awhile. 

When seven did finally roll around, he sent Buffy a message as well letting her know he was there. Angel knew he still had moments where someone showing up gave him a sudden sense of panic so he tried to give her enough reassurances that it would just be him when he did knock. 

"Hey," he greeted with a smile once the door opened. He couldn't help it, his eyes lingering over her cheek a little when she smiled back, then over the rest of her as he walked past her into the room. It felt like a sucker punch every time he even thought of someone wanting to do her harm. 

"You look nice and refreshed," she commented after saying she just needed to grab her bag real quick. 

"Sleep didn't help too much with that but the shower did at least," he told her with a shrug. 

"Same here," she said a little sadly. "I do really miss having a good nights' sleep. Even when I do manage to stay asleep all night, or even if I don't have nightmares about that night or, well, anything else, I still feel like I'm drained all the same come morning."

Angel nodded. He knew how that went all too damn well. 

OoOoO

The awkwardness seemed to fade away again as without warning, Buffy would just start pushing buttons on his radio as a commercial or a song she didn't seem to like would come on. He'd raised an eyebrow at her the first time and she'd blushed saying it was just habit. He told her it wasn't a big deal and she just continued the whole way, flipping through stations as she pleased, listening to a wide variety of genres across the board as she went. 

Sitting across from her in one of the booths, he politely ignored the young waitress all but oogling him each time she came back to the table. Buffy sure didn't and she seemed to find it quite amusing, hyper focusing on the whole situation. "I bet you have this happen all the time," she leaned across the table some to whisper. 

He blushed a little at her giddiness over the whole thing. "Would you just figure out what you want to eat please?" he asked with a laugh. 

"You're no fun."

OoOoO

After a flood of messages started coming through her phone, Buffy made a face as she turned the volume down a little. "Finally had the chance to let a few people know that I had seen you yesterday and we had spent a little time together. Pretty sure you can hear heads exploding."

"It's alright. I told Cordelia this morning and she's still wrapping her head around it." 

"How is Cordy by the way?"

"She's... pretty much the same as always. Busy most of the time."

"Yeah? She and Xander still keep in touch every now and then. She's sent cards and little things to me as well here and there over the past couple of years, too."

Angel got on to talking a little more about his little sister, Lindsey, and somehow wound up asking her if she had a boyfriend... regretting it as soon as the words flew out from between his lips. He wasn't so sure that was a subject he was to bridge with her, or if it would come out in all the wrong ways. 

Buffy shook her head, looking down at her food for a moment. "After... after everything that happened, I had my previous boyfriend before.. him... reach out and he was there, he helped with a lot, he helped me move back into my mom's for awhile and things like that. We tried the whole getting back together thing for awhile but it just didn't work out. He's a sweet guy but just not the person I see myself spending my life with, you know. So, it ended and nothing really serious has happened since then. Just random dates here and there." 

When she asked "What about you? Do you have a girlfriend waiting for you back home?" Angel felt quickly tired thinking of how to answer that. 

"No," he said slowly. "No girlfriend... kind of just date around... a lot. Less than date quite a lot too," he finished, trying hard not to wince. 

"Oh."

"Cordy likes to try and psycho analyze me a lot. She's always telling me it's some sort of panic response to that night, how I was pretty much laid up unable to do anything for months on end and didn't feel like myself so then when I started to again..." he trailed off. 

Buffy nodded. "Makes sense. I kind of went the opposite way, I guess. Going back to a previous relationship was kind of comforting. I knew it wouldn't probably work out in the end for pretty much the same reasons we broke up the first time, but it was still nice, you know? It was someone there, it was someone that I knew very well, and it felt safe."

"It makes sense."

"And then it didn't work... and that's fine, but it is overwhelming to think of starting over again. And not even really about the dating aspect that gets me... more along the lines of you have to get to know someone, you have to be comfortable enough to be around them, to be alone with them, to not freak out if they touch you... to not worry about what if things don't work things out with them and have to pray that they won't go crazy one night and come after you..."

Angel's fingers reached for hers. "That's way too much for someone to have to deal with. And I'm sorry."

"You need to stop apologizing to me so much." 

He shrugged. "I don't think I'd be much better if I did try and settle down with someone. Maybe I wouldn't be as worried as the same things but I'd still be looking at oh, someone has to deal with the endless string of nightmares, moodiness, the bouts of depression that come and go. You have the random panic attacks over the sound of fireworks sometimes or maybe over a scene in a movie, someone standing in another room doing absolutely nothing.... that list goes on and on. Seems easier to just keep the damage parts to myself."

OoOoO

Over the next few days, it seemed Buffy spent all of her free time either sleeping or doing something with Angel. He'd told her since he'd done the whole speech for her, Cordy hadn't asked him to do much else on their trip. She knew she had to get back to Sunnydale and her life but she couldn't help but feel a little dread over it. She'd enjoyed trying to help out here, especially all the things she'd helped Angel put together for the local domestic violence shelter, but unfortunately she couldn't escape reality forever. 

"You sure you have to leave in the morning," he asked, snatching a handful of popcorn from the bowl in her lap. 

They had decided to stay in tonight, Angel had shown up with chinese, and somehow they'd ended up in her bed binge watching Ninety day fiance. It was strange, there weren't very many people she was comfortable with in her personal space. Yet, with him, he fit right in, like that's where he was supposed to be. "Ya, I mean as much as I would love to stay another night… I just need to get back, I've already extended this trip by a whole day, and I could tell my boss wasn't exactly thrilled when I called to let her know I wouldn't be there today." 

He wasn't sure why, but even though they had only spent a couple days together, the thought of not being able to just pop over and see her bothered him for reasons he didn't dare dig into. He didn't have friends that were girls, never really had, well unless you counted his sister, but other than that, he steered clear. Not that he didn't believe girls and guys could be strictly friends, but he knew him, and when it came to women he had a tendency to demolish the potential relationship as soon as any rumblings of feelings began. 

He wasn't sure if it was because of their shared experience or not, but everything about Buffy Summers was different. He didn't even find himself comparing her to other girls, because to him there was no comparison. She was definitely one of a kind, she understood him in a way that he wasn't sure anyone else ever had or would be able too. Apart from his sister and Lindsey, she was quickly becoming one of the few people on this planet that he cared about more than himself. Which was exactly why he intended to try this friendship thing out, if for no reason other than the fact that he simply couldn't imagine his life without her in it. "Well you know, Sunnydales not too far from Los Angeles, we should plan for you to come out one weekend. I'm sure Cordy would love to see you, and you could meet Lindsey." 

"Mmm, I don't know, maybe," she laughed as he tried to grab another handful of popcorn, but failed because she'd snatched it away, having seen him coming. "It might be awhile before I can afford another weekend away though." 

"I thought we were going to  _ share _ the popcorn," he laughed, neither of them seeming to even realize how his arm had come to rest across her small waist. 

Rolling her eyes, she'd asked him if he wanted some and he'd said no, but she should of known to just make the second bag. He was always trying to steal her food, even when they were at a restaurant she would have to swat his hands away as he stole bites off her plate. Grabbing a single piece of the salty snack, she didn't even hesitate to pop it into his mouth. This man was something else. 

"You could just stay with me ya know, there's no reason for you to get a hotel in L.A." He hadn't even thought about the words before they left his mouth, he'd never invited anyone other than his sister or Lindsey to stay at his home. Not that he didn't have a parade of women, but he wasn't exactly the cuddle type. He was more of the mindset of get some, and get gone. Hell a lot of the local Uber drivers knew him by name at this point, as pathetic as that was. 

Sitting the bowl of popcorn onto the small nightstand beside her bed, she turned on her side to face him. Normally staying the night, much less the weekend with any male was absolutely out of the question, but she figured Angel was probably the one person on the entire planet that she really could trust with her life. Besides it's not like she had to worry about him making a move on her or anything, clearly he was way out of her league, and she already knew how he felt about relationships. "I don't know, I wouldn't want to disrupt your manwhore ways," she giggled as she slipped the last piece of popcorn she had in her hand between his lips. 

"Hmm, it would be touch and go, but I think I could control myself for a few days," he mumbled, chewing the kernel. 

Buffy playfully smacked him in the chest, "You sir, are ridiculous." 

"Come on Buffy, it will be fun," he pleaded. Only slightly thrown by the fact that he, Liam Angelus, was practically begging a woman to stay with him. 

"Mmm I don't know Angel, are you sure? What if I get there and it's all awkward, or you find yourself wanting to go out, or wishing you could call someone over. What if you decide if you decide that all these habits you find so intriguing about me right now, are actually really annoying? What if…"

"Buffy stop," he grabbed her shoulder, interrupting her rant sensing that she was about to slip into one of her endless rambles. Not that he didn't enjoy them, most of the time he found it adorable the way she would get lost in a tirade of words and anxiety. "We've literally spent nearly every waking moment together for three days, it's not going to be awkward," absentmindedly he brushed a stray strand of hair back behind her ear before continuing. "Besides, I don't think you could be annoying if you tried." 

Ignoring the slight stirring of the butterflies inside of her, not for the first time she found herself wishing that they had met under different circumstances, that the attack had never happened, that they weren't so fucking damaged. "Fine, but on one condition." 

"What," he asked, eyeing her wearily. 

"You let me be your wing woman one night." 

His eyes nearly bulged out of his head, before he let out a hearty laugh. " _ My wing woman?" _

"Yes, one night when we go out, I get to pick a girl, and then you have to ask said girl out for a date.  _ A real date. _ Not just some screw for the night or whatever."

"Buffy," he groaned as if in warning. "I already told you I don't do relationships." 

"I know. I'm not saying to go marry the girl, or whatever. I'm just saying that you deserve happiness, and despite what you think, not all women are whores. You just have to learn how to connect again, let me help you. It's literally the least I can do."

He wasn't sure how in the hell this girl actually had him contemplating this. It almost seemed as if he couldn't bare to tell her no. While Cordy had been saying and trying to do the same thing for years now, here Buffy was barely a part of his life for seventy two hours, and a part of him felt like there wasn't anything he wouldn't do to see her smile. "Fine," he grumbled, still not believing he'd agreed to this. He could already hear the field day Lindsey was going to have with this one. 

He was pretty sure he could also see Cordelia's head exploding once she caught wind as well, and the hell the two of them would give him when they ganged up on him as they seemed to do more and more often these days. 

"You'll really come out though?" Buffy nodded and his smile got a little brighter. "Just let me know when would work best for you, okay? And if you want to back out when the time comes or you aren't comfortable staying with me after all or whatever we can figure something else. I just think it'd be nice to see you again... and again... and again..."

She laughed a little. "Oh, so this is a recurring thing?"

"Maybe..."

"Mmm. Well that could work in my favor with this whole setting you up gig," she told him and he rolled back onto his back with a groan. 

He couldn't believe out of anything in this world she could have asked for... that is what she had to land on. "Cordy, Lindsey and I actually try and meet up for at least one night or a weekend each month - when possible - to do something together. Sometimes our parents come along or are involved in some way or another... but it's usually just us... and you if you wanted to come along sometime.. Most of the time we wind up just at my parents or my house doing a big movie camp out night but sometimes we will all go to an arcade or go skating or something like that."

"Sounds nice. I don't want to crash on your family time, though."

He shrugged. "You wouldn't be."

OoOoO

Buffy glanced over at the clock on her nightstand, she knew if she was going to make it all the way back home she was going to need to get some sleep soon but God, how she dreaded the idea of Angel leaving and being unsure of when exactly she would get to see him again. Of course they had exchanged information to keep in touch through all means they could possibly think of and had a feeling they'd be in contact all the time... but it wouldn't be the same and she knew it. 

As if reading her mind, he yawned and made a comment about he should probably head out of here so she could get some rest. 

Her stomach dropped a little at the idea, she planned on leaving early in the morning and so this would be goodbye... for now anyway. She did everything possible to keep it together as he slipped his shoes back on and stood, gathering a few random items of his from around the room. "Will you text me or call me when you leave in the morning?"

"And along the way. And when I get home," she lightly teased. She was used to the drill though, enough people worried about her daily and needed check ins. 

Angel leaned against the door, his head tilting slightly as he looked at her still sitting on the bed. "I'm glad you were here," he told her. "I'm glad I got to spend the last couple of days with you. It feels like maybe a piece of me got to heal just by being around you."

Buffy nodded, feeling tears threatening to form. Before she knew it, she was up off the bed, coming around it and all but throwing herself into his arms. It was crushing to think this man had literally taken two bullets for her when he didn't even know her, he'd saved her life, and then he was suddenly in it all these years later... and he was lovely, he made her feel safer than anyone else on this planet, he felt a puzzle piece that had finally fallen into place, and she'd had a little over two days of getting to be around him like this... and now she was going to have to go back home and in another day he would be back at his... and life would have to find a new normal to fit them.

"It's going to be okay," he whispered, pulling her even tighter. 

"I know. It just feels...  _ heavy _ ," she mumbled.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay? And the next day, and all the days until you've had enough of me," he joked. "And hopefully see you soon." 

She nodded, slowly pulling herself back away from him.


	4. Chapter Four

Buffy had to admit that once she actually got home she was rather happy to be there. The house she had been renting when the attack happened had long since been demolished, she'd lived with her mother for the longest time after everything, then a small duplex came up in town and she'd jumped at it. It wasn't big but it was hers. A former police officer rented the room next to her and was high school friends with her mom so it added a little extra security. 

When she had returned to town, Buffy had swung by to see Joyce first then quickly checked in with Willow, Xander and her small gang of favorite people. It was bittersweet to discuss the trip... all that she had done for that poor girls' family, all she'd learned about that whole situation while there... but getting to dish about Angel in proper form finally with each of them was exciting. She still had a hard time wrapping her own mind around the whole thing so didn't blame a single one of them for their reactions as she spoke about how everything happened, how they had been pretty much spent the entire time together since the other night, and how they had plans to keep in touch from now on. 

Willow had been the first to get a certain look in her eye as she listened to Buffy talk about her time with Angel, and obviously treading lightly, she had questioned if there was more to the story or to what was going on between them and Buffy laughed, waving her off. "It's not like that. I don't really know how to explain it though, it's just like we fell into an easy rhythm with one another. We have a connection no one else has and I guess it just comes through in weird ways. That's all. It was nice being around him, being able to really thank him for what he did, to talk to someone who really gets it about what happened, and just.. I don't know, have an easy going time with someone else I didn't have to be on edge around."

Finding some snacks, she sat down and had a quick conversation with Angel through a string of text messages before grabbing her bag and throwing her dirty clothes into the small washing machine. She held off on starting it up however until she had a chance for a proper shower.

OoOoO

"What?" Angel asked after Cordelia kept staring at him. 

"You smile every time your phone goes off."

He rolled his eyes. "I do not."

"And otherwise you just pout and mope. Ever since a certain someone left town."

"I do not," he repeated. 

"Uh-huh."

Clicking his phone off, he shoved it back in his pocket annoyed. Cordelia still had it in her damn head that there was something going on between him and Buffy. "We're just friends Cor," he insisted not for the first time. 

Glancing up at him from the pile of papers stacked in front of her, she nodded her head, "Riight, friends, got it.".

"I'm serious Cordy, you can't be popping off with this crap when she's at the house." 

The pen in her hand stilled as her brain caught up to what he'd just said, "I'm sorry, but I thought you just said Buffy was going to be at your house, I must be losing it because we both know you don't have girls at the house… well unless of course you're screwing them," she added, her face scrunched up. 

Rolling his eyes yet again, he was never happier to hear Cordy's phone go off, sometimes Lindsey's timing really was impeccable. Sliding his own phone back out, he resisted the temptation to smile at her name flashing across his screen. After getting stuck in traffic for a couple extra hours, she'd finally made it home, after stopping at her friends house for a little while. 

It was weird to think he couldn't just jump in the car and head over to her motel tonight. The thought of calling her had crossed his mind more than he cared to admit, but he figured she would probably be tired from the drive and didn't want to bother her. Standing from his chair, he quickly slipped out of his sisters room and back to his own while she was distracted with Lindsey. 

"Hello," he answered quietly, kicking off his shoes, before lying back on his bed for the night. 

"Hey you, what ya doin," she asked cheerily. 

Slipping under the blanket, he couldn't help but smile at the sound of her voice. "Well I was getting the third degree from Cordelia, but you seemed to have saved me from that terrible fate."

"Mmm, what was she grilling you over?" After her own friend's reactions, she had some ideas but she still wanted to hear it from him. 

"She's just not used to me having friends," not that he could blame her, he wasn't exactly known for deep relationships. "Well outside of her and Lindsey I mean." 

Sighing, she could understand that. Her friends hadn't exactly given her an easy time once she told them about her weekend with Angel. Especially Xander, he'd had more than a few things to say about how she'd spent her weekend. She wasn't sure what all had happened between them in the past but it was clear, he wasn't exactly Angel's biggest fan. 

As usual, they soon fell into an easy pattern of conversation. They talked about his plans for the week once he got back to Los Angeles, and he tried once again to convince her to come out the next weekend, already fed up with this whole hours away nonsense. She just laughed and told him she would think about it, which was better than a no. Not wanting to sound too desperate, he dropped it, for now. He asked her how Willow and Xander were, which eventually led to her telling him about some of Xander's remarks, which only earned her a grunt in response, the feelings between the two apparently mutual, but when she tried to press further and ask him about it, he brushed her off, telling her that he could think of a million things to talk about that were more interesting than Xander Harris. 

She let it go, and the next thing she knew it was nearly four in the morning. She voiced that she couldn't remember the last time she'd stayed on the phone so late, and he told her that he wasn't sure he ever had. 

"We should probably get off here soon," she managed between yawns, "You have a long drive tomorrow." 

He'd been watching the clock for the last hour knowing that he should probably tell her he needed to go, but for some reason he'd been unable to bring himself to say the words. "So you'll come on Friday?" 

"Angelll," she whined into the phone. "You're going to get sick of me." 

"Never. Now say you'll come, otherwise were just going to have to stay on the phone." 

Rolling her eyes, she sighed heavily into the receiver. "Okay, but don't think I've forgotten about our little deal either mister." 

Groaning, he still wasn't sure how she'd managed to get him to agree to this nonsense. "Buffy," he began. 

"Hey, you promised," she pouted playfully. 

"Fine," he grumbled, obviously not pleased that she had remembered that little part of the deal. 

"So you'll really come?"

Biting back a smile she sighed, "Well I don't see how you've left me with any choice." 

Suddenly heading home didn't leave him with such a sense of dread. It was technically already Monday, which meant that if she was coming on Friday, he only had to wait four more days. He could live with that.

OoOoO

He only thought he was excited to head home Monday, the drive had been absolutely atrocious, it had taken him twice as long to get home than it had to drive there. Then once he got home it was as though time seemed to come to a screeching fucking halt, crawling by so slowly he was sure that every minute held an extra hour within it, but of course as soon as he got her on the phone at night it was like someone would hit fast forward and before they knew it the sun would be rising. 

"Jeez you’re grumpy, have you not gotten laid this week or something?" 

It was late, and Cordy had called no less than five times today. They hadn't really spoken much since they got back a few days ago, since all of his free time had pretty much been spent talking to Buffy. 

"It's almost ten Cordelia, I've been at the office all damn day, you've been blowing up my phone since before lunch, and not that it's any of your business, but no, I have not."

She couldn't believe her ears, her brother hadn't been out all week. Buffy must really be working a number on him, "Oh my God, you really like her." 

"Damnt Cordy, I've already told you, it's not like that," he spat, annoyed with her already. 

"Angel, you haven't had sex in over a week, and as disgusting as it is that I know that, you're my brother, and I know you better than anyone. You can't honestly expect me to believe that you don't have feelings for this girl." She couldn't wait to tell Lindsey about this, he hadn't believed her at first when she told him that Angel had practically spent the entire weekend with the blonde and hadn't so much as kissed her. Then Angel had ditched out on dinner Tuesday, he'd used the excuse of catching up on sleep but she knew him better than that. She would bet money a certain girl in Sunnydale was keeping him occupied. 

He sighed. "There's feelings, Cordelia, just not the kind you're conjuring up in that twisted up brain of yours. I do like her, I like getting to know her - as a friend. Nothing more, we are just friends."

"You don't have friends. You have acquaintances, you have your family such as myself, and you now have Lindsey... and then there's your endless and random rolls in the hay. That's pretty much it."

"It's different, Cordy. I don't know what to tell you or how to explain it to you. I just like talking to her, I like getting to know her, I like knowing that she's okay out there in the world after wondering about that for years, alright?"

"And that's really all that it is?" she asked skeptically. 

"Yes. So would you please, for the love of all that is holy, would you please stop? The last thing I need is for you to run her off when she's visiting with this stupid nonsense."

"I make no promises," she said after a moment and he groaned. He was sure that was more than likely the best he was going to get when it came to her. "What are we even doing this weekend? Has that been decided? Does Mom and Dad know she's coming to see you?" 

"No, I planned on telling them after the fact. Otherwise I'm sure they'll come knocking and hounding her with a million questions and god knows what else, too. They're supposed to be going with those new neighbors somewhere this weekend anyway, and I don't want them cancelling just to come harass me and her."

"I'm sure they'd have a lot more fun watching this spectacle!" He groaned at her some more. "Well, I will think up some ideas and get back to you."

"Fine."

"Do you think she'd want to go out and about, though? Or more like we all hang out at your place or do something more lowkey?"

"I will ask, how about that?" 

"Usually when we go places you wind up ditching us and taking some bimbo home with you, though. I hope you don't intend on pulling any of that with your company."

Angel rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Obviously not, Cordelia." And after quickly debating it, and even though he knew he would regret it, he mentioned the whole stipulation Buffy had put out there for her to come out.

Cordelia got real silent and he could almost feel those gears turning in her head. "So. Basically everything all of us have been trying to do for, what, two years as a rough estimate? I've known you my entire life and she-" 

"I know, okay. And yes, it's weird an whatever else. It doesn't even mean anything, you know how I feel about dating and relationships. It's just something stupid to do one night and then move on with my life. Nothing to get all huffy about, Cor."

"I am not huffy, Angel. I just think the world is on fire!"

OoOoO

As she walked out of work on Friday, Buffy smiled as she pulled her phone out, ready to tell Angel she was on her way. However, she sighed as she opened the door to her car and rang her mother instead after the six text messages and missed call from eleven minutes ago. "Hey, Mom. What's up?" she asked, barely getting the words out before Joyce was asking her to come by and see her before she took off to LA. Buffy agreed though she had an idea of how the whole conversation was bound to go before she got there. 

"I don't like this," Joyce said quietly, ringing her hands in her lap. "I know it's not my place and you need to be independent and... and I know all of it. But I worry, Buffy. You just came back from that trip up North and now you're going to LA for a few days so soon?"

Buffy smiled, moving closer to her mother on the couch. "It is scary, and I love that you care enough to worry."

"Of course I care, you're my daughter, the only one I got. You're my world, Buffy."

Buffy hugged her, what had happened had put her and Angel in a club all of their own... but what happened effected so many people beyond just the two of them all at the same time. Joyce hadn't had an easy time the past three years by any means. 

"I understand... sort of... why it's important because it's Angel, but at the same time I can't help but think you hardly even know him or know anything about him."

"Maybe not, maybe I don't know him as well as, say, Xander or Willow but I know him better than I did after our few days together. And, I don't know mom, I want to get to know him, I want to spend time with him. Being around him is one of the few times I'm ever able to feel... almost normal. I feel safe, I feel free to be weird or silly or whatever else. "

"I just worry... I know he saved your life, I have a mountain of gratitude toward this man I don't even know... but you'll be-"

"I will be fine. And I will check in with you, and I will be home before you know it."

OoOoO

Angel let out a deep breath, looking around the spare bedroom. 

"Are you sure you're okay?" Cordelia asked. 

"What if she's not comfortable here? I mean, I am kind of a stranger right?"

"Then you can send her to my place, or mom, or get her a hotel," Cordy suggested. "It's not like she has any more psycho ex boyfriends I have to worry about trying to kill you does she?"

"That's not what I meant," he growled out. 

"If there's something that brings her comfort I am sure she will have it packed, Angel. And, I mean, you have the guy who saved your life once under the same roof... what more do you really need, ya know?"

"Maybe," he said with another sigh. The last person to actually stay here was his live in nurse, other than that it'd been his sister overnight, Lindsey, or once Andrew who worked with Cordy when he drank too much. 

"It's going to be fine. She will get there, you two will have your little alone time to do whatever in the hell it is you two do together," she said and Angel rolled his eyes and prayed for someone to invent a way to strangle someone through a phone line, "And tomorrow we can all spend the day together. I have that conference call in the morning but after that I will be free."

"Yeah, well, you and Lindsey worry me about this whole thing, too."

"I already promised to be on my best behavior."

"That's not saying a whole lot, Cor."

"Asshole!" 

"When is she supposed to be choosing this girlfriend of yours?"

"A date, not a girlfriend. And I don't know. I'm kind of winging most of this shit right now."

Cordy rolled her eyes on the other end of the line, her brother had never been one for planning, "Well listen, I'm pulling up to Lindsey's so why don't you talk to her, and after you figure out what she wants to do let me know. We could go bowling, or hang out at my community pool, I'm sure either of those would provide her with plenty of options to choose from for your quote unquote  _ date _ ." 

Rolling his eyes, he already knew that he was never going to live this down. "I'll talk to her tonight, why don't you and Linds just come over in the morning and we can figure it out from there?" 

After telling him that they would be there bright and early, she was quick to get off the phone, but not before assuring him one more time that everything was going to be fine and telling him that he just needed to  _ chill _ . 

Chill… Unfortunately that was a lot easier said than done. 


	5. Chapter Five

Ignoring the swarm of butterflies in the pit of her stomach, she wasn't even sure why she was so nervous. "It's just Angel," she kept trying to tell herself. There was absolutely no reason to be nervous, not only had they spent all weekend together, they'd spent countless hours on the phone since her return to Sunnydale. Taking one last deep breath, she reached up to knock on the oversized door. 

The next thing she knew she was staring back at those mahogany eyes that had haunted her dreams for far too long. Without even giving him time to speak, she dropped her duffel bag and practically jumped into his arms, wrapping her own tightly around his neck. "Miss me?" 

"Mm, maybe a little," he smirked down at her. The truth was, he wasn't sure he had ever missed anyone the way he had her these last few days. Cordelia was right, he didn't even remember what it was like to have a friend. "How was the drive," he asked, his arms still wrapped around her. 

"Eh, it was a drive. But it wasn't too bad, I missed most of the traffic due to me having to stop by Mom's," she paused to meet his eyes once again, "She was kind of freaking."

Seeing his look of confusion, she was quick to clarify. "Not freaking because of you, just freaking that I was leaving again for the weekend. Honestly, I'm pretty sure the fact that it was you, was the only thing that kept her from locking me up." 

Nodding, he kissed her forehead before forcing himself to release her. "Maybe she would feel better if I came out to Sunnydale sometime, I don't want her worrying about you every time you're here." 

Watching as he grabbed her bag, she couldn't help but smile up at him, "Planning our future already? You better hope your future girlfriend doesn't have any problems with this little arrangement.". 

Groaning, between her and Cordy he'd about had enough of all this girlfriend talk. The only girl he was worried about right now, was her. Walking passed her, he didn't even dignify her little comment with a response, instead he began giving her a quick tour of his house, pointing out the various rooms as they went along. He showed her the guest room, where he'd sat her bag, his office, quickly pointed out the restrooms, and then nervously gave her a tour of his own bedroom. He watched from the doorway as she trailed a finger across the slanted footboard of his four poster bed, "Who are you, Hugh Hefner," she giggled, taking in the sight of his red satin sheets.

Fighting back embarrassment, he'd told Cordy the silk was too much when she gave them to him last Christmas as a joke. But being Cordelia, she'd insisted, showing up one day and changing them herself while he was at work. "You can thank Cordy for those," he muttered, shrugging. 

He wasn't sure if it was because of all the shit Cordy had been giving him, or if it was simply that it had been a while since he saw another woman in his room, but suddenly he felt a little taken back by the beauty standing before him. The thought of what her honey roasted skin would look like pressed up against the sheets in question quickly flashed through his mind, before he forced the images away, not allowing himself to dwell on where exactly those thoughts had come from. "It's just Buffy," he repeated to himself, the lack of sex obviously catching up to him. 

After her thorough inspection of his room, she followed him back into the living room where they fell into easy conversation. He warned her about Cordy and Lindsey coming over tomorrow, and asked her if she had any idea what she wanted to do. She didn't really have any ideas of her own, but jumped on the suggestion of visiting the pool with them, luckily having thought to pack the new swimsuit she'd bought for the summer. 

OoOoO

Swatting his chopsticks away from her chinese container, she stuck her tongue out at him as he snagged a piece of her orange chicken. She wasn't sure why she'd been so nervous about this, she was right, it was just Angel. Somehow they had decided to abandon the couch and taken up place in his enormous bed, just like before the tv was basically just being used for background noise as they got lost in conversation about everything from work, to Cordy's new boyfriend. She showed him all of the new memes she'd run across during the week, and laughed when he squirmed as a picture of Xander flashed across her phone in the process. 

"You two are ridiculous," she sighed, abandoning her dinner on the nightstand so she could snuggle deeper into his bed.

"Please," he groaned. "Don't ever compare me to Harris," he begged, sitting his own food to the side to pull her closer. As usual, Cordelia didn't know what she was talking about. Him and Buffy were friends, he wasn't sure why he'd let her get to him earlier, he should have known there was no reason to get all worked up. Sure, having a platonic relationship with another female wasn't exactly normal for him, but Buffy wasn't just some random woman either, they'd been through the most traumatic experience of their lives together, they were bound to share a bond others couldn't easily understand. 

She laughed as he pulled her to rest up against him, breathing deeply, she'd missed the way he smelled so much. "So what about your parents, should I be preparing for an interrogation from them too?" 

Handing her the remote, he shook his head and explained how he had managed to avoid that, for now at least. He was sure come Monday he would get an earful though, especially after tomorrow with having Cordy and Lindsey over. There was no way his sister would be able to keep her mouth shut, no matter how badly he wanted to keep Buffy to himself, he knew eventually he would have to share her and whatever was going on with them with more people in each of their lives. 

He could already picture the awkwardness over and over again around everyone he could think of, but when it came to this particular blonde he figured it was well worth it in the end. Every time he thought about his mom or dad being around Buffy though he could almost already feel them both losing their minds, his mom probably crying and hugging the tiny girl to near death and tell her how sorry they were for what happened those few years ago... Meeting Buffy's mom or her friends that he'd never had the chance to before he really didn't know what to expect there, though.

Maybe, he thought, it wouldn't be so bad. Her being here, being around his family and him hers... maybe that would just bring them closer somehow and he'd find some little spot in her life to fit in besides that guy who just happened to be there at the wrong place at the wrong time alongside her that night.

"Oh, now, would you look at this?" Buffy's voice interrupted his thoughts. He looked at her then over at the tv. "An infomercial about a crack team of love doctors? Hmm!" Rolling his eyes, he wondered if there was any way out of this stupid portion of the deal they had made. "Maybe I can pick up some pointers," she joked with a teasing smile. "Hell, I don't even know what your type is yet, you know."

"I don't have a type," he grumbled out. 

"Oh, come on. Blondes? Brunettes? Fiery redheads?" Angel shrugged and she shook her hair a little. "So, what? You just jump off into bed with anyone who crosses your path?" she asked. 

He was never more sure that she and Cordelia would have plenty to bond over than in this moment. "I don't know. You see someone, you're attracted to them... there's not much to it."

"That's it?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"Basically."

She sighed dramatically. "You might need more work than I realized."

"More trouble than what it's worth I believe is what you're looking to say."

"Oh no, you are not getting out of this whole deal that easily, sir. That will not be happening."

OoOoO

After about the fifteenth time a yawn took her over and she nearly drifted off to sleep halfway through a sentence, Buffy mumbled that she had probably get up and go on to bed. 

Looking over at her, he couldn't help but smile as he took in how innocent she looked right then. His heart squeezed though a moment later as his mind drifted to wondering how in the hell someone could have ever hurt her, especially someone who she'd let into her life, trusted, someone who claimed they loved her. 

"You look worried over there," Buffy mumbled, one eye glancing at him half opened. "I'm getting up. Promise."

"No, I was just worried you might not be comfortable here," he covered smoothly. "Nights aren't exactly a walk in the park and you're in a strange house with someone you don't really know and all. I don't want you to wake up and be scared or something."

Her head barely moved, shaking to the side a little. "Not at a strange house. I'm with you."

Leaning down, his hand tangled up in those silky blonde locks for a moment as he kissed her forehead softly. "How about you sleep here so you don't have to worry about getting up? I can crash in there, I can bring your bag in here and put it on the dresser or something if you want."

Her head moved again. "Stay," was all she whispered and then she was off to dreamland. 

Angel watched over her for a few moments before slipping out of the bed to go use the restroom after grabbing something to change into. Getting ready for bed, he scratched at the back of his head contemplating what he was supposed to do. Slipping his pants off, he switched out into some loose drawstring plaid pajamas, sure that he didn't need to be half naked and making her uncomfortable. 

Between changing shirts, his hand lingered on his lower abdomen, thoughts the same. He didn't need the jarring image of the scar from the bullet that nearly took his life nor from the surgeries that saved him, his endless physical reminder of that night scaring her off either. 

He couldn't even remember the last time he'd even let anyone see that part of him outside of a doctor's office. He'd worked very hard to keep it under wraps since "healing" around family, friends, hell even the long list of women he'd paraded around with he had found countless ways around having to be exposed around any of them. 

Making sure to leave the bathroom light on, he cracked the door enough that usually made him feel a little more at ease, then slipped back into the way too inviting bed, making sure to keep a good distance between his body and hers. He wasn't sure he should be doing this, even though she had asked, and more concerning he didn't know the last time he had actually fallen asleep with someone in bed with him. 

OoOoO

Waking up, feeling as refreshed as she was going to at this point, Buffy was sure had she opened her eyes and seen anything other than Angel's face she might have panicked, even if just for a moment while she remembered where she was and why. But she blinked, and there he was, lightly snoring away at basically the edge of the bed. She popped her head up a little and hoped he didn't roll over to his back or something as he'd wind up flat in the floor if he did. 

Sitting up, she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and stretched a little, taking in the room much like she had last night. She wasn't sure what she had expected upon agreeing to come here, but just about everything seemed to fit the man she'd begun getting to know. Everywhere you looked it seemed like everything was bold and neat, all in its place, next to nothing that wasn't absolutely necessary, She didn't doubt what little decor he had came from Cordy or something. 

It was a far cry from her little duplex back in Sunnydale, that was for sure. 

Tip-toeing, she moved around the room, her fingers dancing across various items, taking it all in again. Going to the bathroom quickly, she got nosy, opening random drawers, peeking inside his impressive looking shower, looking inside his medicine cabinet. Her eyes quickly read over some of the prescriptions he had tucked away in there, several matching her own or at least ones she'd taken or at least was supposed to in the past. Sleep aids she knew he didn't take from previous conversations they'd had, medication for anxiety, depression, and a list of others. 

Closing the three mirrored doors to the medicine cabinet, she fixed her extremely messy ponytail a bit, washed her face and quietly crept back into the bed. Angel hadn't moved, and she was pretty sure if she so much as poked him, it would send him tumbling to the floor. Not wanting to startle him, she knew better than anyone what being jolted back to reality could do to your day, she scooted as close as she could possibly get without actually touching him. Lacing her fingers with his she gently tugged his outstretched arm around her, the movement must have woken him somewhat as he quickly closed the distance between them, rolling over, he pulled her until she was situated firmly beneath him, her thighs perfectly cradling his hips. 

He'd been nearly convinced that what he was experiencing was a dream until he felt her small hand tugging on his own. Without thought, he found himself drawn to the warm body, she smelled like daffodils, a warm summer night, he felt his manhood coming to life as her soft thighs clasped around his hips, pulling him further into her. 

She wasn't sure what was happening, but whatever it was, she didn't want to be the one to end it. Her fingers trailed over the broad expanse of his shoulders, stopping only when they came into contact with the short hairs of his nape. His face was buried in the crook of her neck, his warm breath sending chills down her spine as he began to place random open mouth kisses up the smooth curve. Hovering above her, he paused for a second while his eyes finally fluttered open, as he braced himself for the fantasy to disappear… except she didn't. 

"Buffy," he questioned, his voice barely a whisper. 

She could feel him, pulsing and hard against her, her entire body seemed to tingle as her eyes finally locked onto his. Time seemed to grind to a halt, everything felt as though it was happening in slow motion, their eyes locked, no more words were needed as he began to inch his lips closer to her own. His nose trailed against hers as he lightly grazed his lips over her subtle pout, teasing, tormenting. She couldn't remember a time when she had ever craved someone's lips before this, not like this. 

He wasn't sure what was happening, one minute he'd been asleep, and the next he felt her tugging him towards her. Sleep not allowing his brain to second guess anything, he went willingly, melting into her. His body was on fire, his cock throbbed painfully between them as he sank between her welcoming thighs. Kissing up the soft skin of her neck, he couldn't seem to get enough of the taste of her. His lips tingled with the unrestrained need to press up against her own. Forcing his eyes opened, he needed to be sure that this was real, that this wasn't some fantasy his mind had conjured up. She was fucking breathtaking lying there, her mouth barely parted against his pillow. 

He didn't think he had ever fit so perfectly up against another woman in his entire life, every bend, every curve of her body seemed to perfectly sculpt against his own. As consciousnesses began slowly reclaiming him, the thoughts that he should stop kept attempting to infiltrate his mind, but he ignored them, far too captivated with the beauty before him. 

Everything seemed to pause as she finally looked up to meet his gaze, neither one of them uttered a word as a silent conversation seemed to pass between them. Her hands circled around him, drawing him in even closer, he tried to grasp onto all the reasons why he shouldn't be doing this, why they shouldn't, but wrapped up in her arms like this he couldn't seem to remember a single one. All he could focus on, all he could think about was the taste of her on his tongue. 

His lips softly brushed across her own a few times in an effort to give her a chance to change her mind, but much to his delight instead of pushing him away, she only seemed to try and pull him closer. Unable to stand her tiny moans for a second longer, he'd just begun to fully press his lips to hers when a shrill scream had him startled, pulling back panicked, he hurried to yank the covers up in an effort to conceal them. 

"Damnt Cordelia," he practically growled, rolling off Buffy even though every fiber of his being seemed to shout out in protest. Gathering her in his arms, he pulled her against his chest where she seemed to bury her face, obviously embarrassed. 

"You are such a fucking liar! I knew it, I knew this whole we're just friends thing was an act. You and females do not equal friends… EVER!" She couldn't believe the asshole had lied to her, as if she cared that he boned the little damsel in distress. No, what she cared about was walking into his house and being nearly blinded by images of her fucking brother screwing the blonde vixen. 

"CORDY," he finally yelled loud enough to snap her out of her little fit. "We have clothes on," he stressed, lifting the covers for a second so that she could fully see them. 

"Oh… but you were on top of, you were kissing… I'm soo going to be scarred." 

Using his free hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, he sighed, beyond frustrated for more than one reason. "Cordelia, can you just shut the damn door please." 

She was absolutely positive she was going to be the first person to ever die of embarrassment. She wasn't even sure what the hell had happened, one second she was just trying to make sure he didn't go tumbling off of the bed, and the next he was on top of her, kissing her, she wasn't sure how she could be so stupid. They were friends, they were quickly becoming best friends, and not only that Angel didn't exactly do relationships, and she definitely wasn't one for one night stands. They both knew that this would never work between them, they'd just had a lapse in judgment, that's all it was. 

At least that's what she tried to convince herself of as she buried her face further into his chest, listening to him and Cordy go at it. Great, now Cordy was going to think she was just one of his whores too. What a great first impression. Maybe they could blame it on being asleep, her mind was beginning to spin as she listened to Cordelia finally relent and close the door, but not before making some quip to Angel about getting up. She wasn't moving, she wasn't talking, she just wanted to rewind time fifteen minutes and put an end to all this nonsense before it even started. 

Shifting them, he scooted down so that their faces were level, even though hers was still tucked into his arm. He could see the blush that had crept over her cheeks, and all he could hope was that he hadn't thoroughly just screwed things up between them. He was also having a hard time getting passed the memory of her body lying so perfectly beneath his, but for both their sakes he was trying not to dwell too much on that. As it usually was, his sister's timing was endlessly, utterly impeccable. 

“Sorry,” he finally mumbled out. “I’m not used to someone being in my bed unless.... Pretty sure I was half asleep and acting on instinct or something there,” he tried to lamely brush it all off. 

“It’s okay,” Buffy’s voice said softly. “You looked a little dazed so I kind of figured.” 

"I didn't mean to attack you like that."

Buffy's eyes drifted out from behind his arm. "You didn't attack me, Angel. I'm not hurt, I'm perfectly fine... And I know, it's okay," she repeated. "Just... embarrassing."

"I'll deal with Cordelia, don't worry about it." 

OoOoO

After trying again to make sure that he hadn't completely ruined whatever friendship he had growing with the blonde quickly, trying to make sure she didn't want to grab her things and run out of here like a bat out of hell and never look back, he hurried back out into the rest of the house, practically shielding Buffy as she walked behind him to run to the other room while he dealt with the two of these damn fools staring at him. 

Waiting until she closed the door, Angel rushed over to his sister and Lindsey who was just standing against the wall with a giant shit eating grin on his face. Before he even had a chance to say anything, Cordelia's mouth opened up, running a mile a minute. 

"Cordy!" he tried three times before she paused. 

"What?" she all but yelled. 

His head glanced back toward where the spare bedroom was before he laid his hands flat against the kitchen bar. "I just fucked up," he whispered. "I fucked up royally."

She stopped, her eyes narrowing as she looked at him. 

"I don't know what in the hell happened," he rushed out. "We were up talking and watching tv... then she was half asleep so I told her to just go ahead and sleep where she was. I slept on the edge, as far from her as I could get... and we just slept, Cor. Then... I don't know. She grabbed my hand and I just was... there. And I... reacted, like I normally would... pretty much either that or choking someone out-"

"Which I know about all too well-"

"And I am pretty sure that the damn girl who has been through more than anyone should have ever had to go through... I'm pretty sure I just managed to make her life worse. I like her as I keep telling you, telling both of you, I like being around her, I like her being here, and I just fucked all of that up."

Cordelia stared at him for a moment before sighing and rolling her eyes. "All you did was kiss her?"

"Yes. I mean I was on top of her-"

"Yeah, I am horrified to have that to remember, thank you," she cut him off. "But, also, breaking my brain forever... it wasn't like she was complaining, Angel. She looked like a more than willing participant in whatever was going on in there."

"Maybe she was in shock," Lindsey threw out and earned a glare in the process. "What? Maybe she was, or maybe she was afraid to react... girl went through a lot."

Angel's shoulders slumped a little. "See? I fucking scared her, that's what you saw."

As he started rambling on his worries about how his massive slip up must have destroyed everything, Cordelia looked annoyed. "You're so stupid, Angel."

"I know that! That is what I'm saying!" 

Lindsey coughed a minute later and darted his eyes behind them, turning to see Buffy shyly standing behind him he felt his stomach tighten back up. "Hi there, darlin'," Lindsey drawled out. "You are a tiny little thing, aren't you?" he asked, taking her in before stepping closer and extending a hand. "I'm Lindsey, nice to meet you."

Buffy smiled a little, shaking his hand quickly. "Buffy."

"I have heard quite a bit about you... but I don't know how you like your eggs. I brought donuts and now that things have hopefully settled down from all this excitement... maybe I could get breakfast goin'? And we can go over our plans for the day ahead, alright?"

OoOoO

Buffy nodded at whatever Lindsey had said, glancing at him adding salt and pepper to the hot pan before looking back to Angel and feeling her heart sink a little with how tense he continued to look. She still couldn't believe what had happened earlier, still remembering how he felt on top of her, his body pressed against hers, and tried to shake off the craving for him to do all of it all over again. 

She was so lost in that little daydream that she hadn't even noticed Cordelia coming back over until she was standing right beside her. 

"My brother's a big whore and he lacks social skills on any and all levels so please forgive him for acting like a horny buffoon. He's still learning how to not sleep with every female who crosses his path."

Buffy blushed. "We're just friends, it's not like that at all. Despite what it must have looked like..."

Cordelia waved her off. "I think there's a lot more going on than either of you want to admit."

Buffy just shrugged. She wasn't up for arguing with Cordelia, nor did she want to let her mind go down those roads of thought any more than they had. This morning was a slip, a mistake, nothing more than that. 

Cordelia stared at Buffy. She couldn't help but notice the slight differences in her smile, how she handled herself even felt different than how she remembered the small blonde. She was the complete opposite from Angel though it seemed, she was still bubbly and warm, inviting. 

She didn't know why out of everyone on this planet she was the one Angel had to decide he wanted to know outside of being naked and gyrating against them, but she didn't hate the idea. She didn't want to walk in on them in any more compromising positions or anything, but she couldn't help but hope he could make something work with the girl who'd turned everyone's lives upside down once upon a time. 

They could claim to be "just friends" all that they wanted but she knew her brother, and she damn well knew what she had seen this morning. There was something going on beyond the two of them just connecting and moving forward from that night, there was more than friendly feelings and vibes brewing between them. 

The biggest part of her wanted to be ecstatic about it, but she couldn't help but worry, too. Angel was so damaged after that night and from his long road to recovery, Buffy couldn't be much better off. It made sense to her, hell it read like a damn fairytale even, but it could also be one hell of a mess if things went sideways.


	6. Chapter Six

Hopping up on the sink counter, Buffy let her head fall to Angel's shoulder. "Can we just, like, pretend nothing  _ weird  _ happened between us and go back to having fun and being normal?"

Angel kissed her forehead. "Yes, please. I wasn't sure how much more of this awkwardness I could take." 

Twining her fingers with his, she giggled, "Well good, cause the way Cordy and Lindsey talk this community pool of hers is all the rage." 

Leaning down to kiss the top of her head, he groaned,"Ya, well Cordy has a way of making everything sound better than it is."

"So, we're good," she asked, squeezing his hand in hers. "I just don't want things to get all wonky between us because I kissed you." 

"Wonky," he repeated. "And for the record, you never kissed me." 

"Ya wonky, you know like weird, crazy." Popping her head up off his shoulder she looked up at him grinning, "And ya okay, so maybe I let you kiss me." 

He just shook his head, "Trust me, you would know if I kissed you Buffy."

Her eyes went wide at his little confession as she shrugged, "Ya well, you wouldn't have cared when your sister walked in if I kissed you back." 

He couldn't help but laugh at her sudden burst of boldness, bringing her hand to his lips he pressed a kiss to the back of her palm, before releasing her so that he could slide his arm around her. He'd never met anyone like her, and the last thing he ever wanted to do was put their relationship in jeopardy, he cared about her far too much to throw it all away over some tumble in the sheets. 

The sound of someone clearing their throat had them both hoping off the counter and spinning around. Lindsey stood in the doorway, that trademark shit eating grin plastered across his face. Angel knew there was no telling what all he'd heard, but judging from that smile on his face, he figured he'd been there for most of it. "Are you two lovebirds done pussy footing around yet? 'Cause I got a girl in there that keeps complaining about how we're going to lose the sun." 

Angel slapped a hand over his face, he knew having them over was a terrible idea, and so far the two of them had done nothing but prove him right. "Well now we can't have that," chirped Buffy as she excused herself to go get changed real quick. 

"What?" Lindsey hissed when Angel wouldn't stop staring at him. Cordelia was right, her brother was definitely feeling somethin' for the little blonde. 

"Love birds, really?" 

He just shrugged, "Man, lighten up. She knows I'm joking." Walking over to the fridge he made sure to grab the twelve pack he'd stashed when they first arrived. "Besides you act like everyone can't see what's going on between the two of you." 

Angel sighed, "There's nothing going on between us."

"Riiight," he laughed, unloading his beer into the small cooler they'd brought.

"Damnt Linds, I'm serious. We're just friends." 

Just then Buffy came prancing back into the kitchen to ask the boys if they were ready to go. She'd traded her t-shirt and shorts for her swimsuit, and some little sheer number that she swore was supposed to be a cover up. Needless to say, it didn't leave much to the imagination. Lindsey laughed as he watched Angel's face when she walked out of the room. 

He liked this girl already, "Just friends, huh." 

OoOoO

He only thought Cordelia's swimsuits were out of hand, he'd damn near choked on his burger when Buffy had pulled the thin fabric she was masquerading as a dress over her head. Discarding it over the back of one of the chairs, he was almost positive he lost the ability to form words as he took in the sight of her in the smallest amount of fabric imaginable.

"Come on," she told him, tugging his hand towards the pool. 

"I wish I had a friend like that!" Lindsey shouted, before promptly being smacked in the stomach by Cordelia. 

"Ow," he pretended to grumble as he spun around and lifted her clear off the ground. 

"Lindsey Mcdonald, put me down, or I swear to God." 

Buffy and Angel watched the couple from the other side of the pool, "He's an  _ interesting _ character," she whispered, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Lindsey?" he questioned, " Eh, he's okay once you get used to him." 

"He seems nice," she whispered, wrapping her legs around his waist. 

Trying to focus on anything except for the toned thighs wrapped around his waist, he shrugged, "Sometimes." 

"See anything you like?" 

His mind was nowhere near the place it should be, "Huh?". 

"The girls Angel, what about that one," she asked, pointing some brunette across the way. 

Holding her with one hand, he used the other to shield the sun from his eyes, "I'm pretty sure that's her kid," he groaned, not in the least bit interested in any of them women here. 

"Do we really have to do this," he asked, pulling her into deeper water. Unable to keep his hands to himself, they kept moving from her thighs, to her waist, and back all over again. Even if there was someone here who peaked his interest, he highly doubted they would give him the time of day after seeing the way the two of them were all wrapped up together. 

"Yes," she giggled. Even though the last thing she wanted to do was watch him go hit on some other woman, she figured that was the only way to get all of these lusty thoughts out of her system. Then they could go back to being strictly friends, like they were supposed to be.

"And why are you still wearing this," she asked, slipping her hands beneath his wife beater. Almost instantly, her fingers came into contact with the jagged flesh, his permanent reminder from that night. 

"Ohh," she whispered as her fingers continued to lightly trace its shape. "I don't-I wasn't, I'm sorry," she finally rushed out. 

Had she been anyone else he would have already tossed her off him, normally anyone even attempting to invade his space in that way would immediately send him into a panic. He braced himself, preparing for that wave of fear to rush through him, but it never came. Instead he found himself telling her that it was okay, even as her fingers slid higher up his side, searching for the scars end. 

Cordy kept a close eye on the two of them, watching carefully as they floated around the pool together. She still wasn't sure what to think, not only did both of them seem to be in complete denial, but after witnessing what she had this morning, she couldn't help but think about how this whole "let's set Angel up on a date" thing was only going to blow up in their faces. She knew her brother damnt, better than anyone, and for some reason he was completely fucking smitten, whether or not he was ready to admit it. 

"Why do I have to do everything," she mumbled, getting up from her lawn chair. 

"What are you going on about," Lindsey asked, popping the top off another beer. 

"I think he likes her," she sighed, gesturing towards her brother in the pool.

"Well no shit princess." 

"No, I mean likes her likes her. As in more than a friend and more than he simply just wants to jump her bones... all of which is entirely un-Angel like."

"Again, no shit. I have eyes, Cordelia. I can see what's happening. Angel's acting all out of sorts, they seem to always be hanging off on one another, hell you caught them in one hell of a situation together apparently just this morning... it ain't hard to put the pieces together."

"Except, obviously, for the two of them."

Lindsey glanced over at them again. "Well, I don't know what to tell you there. I wanna say that I think both of them know there's some feelings goin' on rather than they are just completely oblivious. Like they know somewhere inside of them but they don't want to know."

Cordy sighed. "Do you know how long I have waited for him to get his head out of his ass? How much time and energy I have spent trying to talk sense into that thick skull of his, to try and find him someone who he could maybe settle down with, even to just spend a little time around without just taking their clothes off? And she just showed up out of the blue and life got all flipped around."

"Isn't that exactly what you wanted?"

"But why does it have to be  _ her _ ?"

Lindsey looked confused. "I thought you liked Buffy."

"I do, I don't know her very well but I like her, Lindsey. I like that she's filling some hole inside of Angel and that she makes him happy but I'm worried, too. Look at how much of a basket case he can be, can you imagine what she must go through, too? I keep picturing a perfect storm as I look over there, their deep, hidden issues colliding. I understand being around one another helps but I can also see how it could be too much, being around someone who's always a reminder of the worst thing that ever happened to you? The last thing I want is either of them to wind up making daily life harder than it already is on each other."

Shrugging, Lindsey told her she was overthinking everything, that they seemed fine. 

"Maybe. But even this whole song and dance show they have going on is going to wind up a disaster and probably ruin things before they could even get to that point. When does the best friend pinning after the boy while he goes after someone else ever go over well? I mean, they write stories and novels and movies about this."

OoOoO

As Buffy's fingers lingered, her thoughts went from being concerned that she had crossed some line of privacy with him to her heart beating faster, suddenly flooded with mental images of him undressed, under her, her lips following the trail her fingers were currently following along. 

The man had literally taken a bullet for her. Ninety nine percent of the time she could feel her heart sink with guilt over that, but right now everything was heading in a complete opposite direction. 

"Sorry," she breathed out once more, still not pulling her hands away from him. Her pulse seemed to race as her eyes met his, everything feeling as though it was starting to mirror this morning as he looked back at her. Suddenly she was hyper aware of their bodies tangled together under the surface of the cool water, his fingertips digging slightly into her flesh, how easily it would be to just lean forward and taste him all over again.

"So, you two find the lucky future Mrs. Liam Angelus Chase yet?"

Buffy blinked hard a couple of times before turning toward Lindsey, her hand quickly sliding back out from the tank top. "No," she answered a little breathlessly. "He keeps turning everyone down."

"Well, I can't imagine why," Lindsey smirked. "Though you might have to wait until our next stop to find Mrs. Right given I'm pretty sure every woman in here has their eyes trained on the two of you."

Buffy started to blush a little, trying to stealthily glance around, not surprised to find more than a few pairs of jealous eyes burning holes into her. "Whoops," she giggled. Maybe they did give off the wrong impression carrying on like they were she suddenly thought. 

Though it didn't stop her from basically keeping herself attached to him the entire time either. 

OoOoO

Grabbing back a hold of the handle on her floating ring, Angel groaned as she again brought up this whole dating idea and asking him where he was planning on taking this mystery girl she'd yet to settle on. "I don't know," he grumbled. 

"You could do dinner and a movie? It's classic."

"I can't do movie theaters."

Buffy looked over at him and nodded a little. "Me either actually. But you could do dinner and a drive in or watch a movie anywhere really."

He groaned. 

"You could take her to mini golf?"

"I wanna go mini golfing with you," he said with a hint of a smile. 

"A zoo or an aquarium?"

"That's a lot of time to be spending with someone," he muttered, flipping over to his back and grabbing for her handle again so she wouldn't float away from him. 

"But animals are fun!"

"I could go with you," he threw out. "We could go see these fun animals and walk around and do all the things."

Buffy laughed and lightly slapped at his arm. "You're not helping."

"I'd rather be doing shit with you than someone I don't even want to be around."

"Well, you're supposed to be finding someone you do in fact like doing things like that with, that's the point here, Angel!"

"And I did, I found you!" 

"Well, technically I found you and that doesn't count," she told him, making him grumble some more at her. "Oooh, what about her?"

Angel sighed, lifting his head up. "Who?" 

Buffy nodded her head toward a curly haired brunette who was just setting her things down. 

"I've already slept with her."

Buffy's eyes widened, looking behind her. "Really?" He shrugged, letting his head fall back down. "What's her name?" 

Shrugging again, he tried to think. "Jen? Gwen? Lynn? Something like that... I think." 

"She's pretty."

"I guess," he muttered, keeping his eyes closed. 

Buffy seemed to keep staring at the other woman before shaking her head and forcing her eyes back toward him. "Well, maybe you start with dinner."

"Fine."

"You get through a dinner and maybe you'll be more open to some of the other ideas for your second date."

Popping his eyes opened he glared over at the pretty blonde. "What? There is no second date. This is a one time only deal."

Buffy shook her head. "Nope! Every time I come out we can try to set you up with someone until maybe one of them stick and you'll want to go on multiple dates with someone and wind up finally building a real, grown up relationship."

"There was no agreement about that!" he argued. 

"Well one random date isn't going to help you any, that's the whole point," she huffed, using his arm to pull him closer. 

He shook his head, "No, that's just less time I get to spend with you." 

She could definitely see how so many women fell for him. 

OoOoO

As they were all beginning to prune, and the sun was starting to set, they decided to head back to Angel's for pizza and movies. They were just into their second film, some romantic comedy that Cordelia had picked out when he pulled her down on the couch, curling his body around hers. 

From their spot across the room, Cordelia elbowed Lindsey to get his attention, tilting her head in the direction of her brother and Buffy. "I gotta say Angel, I know we're friends and all, but if you ever try to an' spoon me like that we're gonna have some issues." 

Angel flipped him off as he held her tighter, her head tucked beneath his chin he closed his eyes and let himself get lost in her scent. He wasn't sure what was going with him, he'd never felt like this before. Not once in his entire life had he ever been content to just hold someone like this, any other time he would have already come up with some excuse to drag her back to the bedroom. It wasn't due to lack of attraction either, she was breathtaking, sometimes her smile really felt like it made the room light up. His life seemed lighter when she was in it, even today, he couldn't remember the last time he'd felt that happy, that carefree. Even when she discovered his scar, she didn't look at him with pity or disgust, she looked at him like he was the bravest person in the world, and that fucking terrified him. It had barely been a week since she tracked him down, and already the thought of letting her go home tomorrow cut him up inside. He hated the distance between them, he couldn't stand the thought of something happening to her and him being so far away. 

She was struggling to keep her eyes open when she felt his hand begin tracing small lines up and down her stomach beneath the quilt they were sharing. Snuggling deeper into his arms, she held her breath as he slid his hand beneath her oversized shirt to run along her bare skin. She'd never felt like this before, even with her ex-boyfriends, her skin had never tingled at their touch. Every time she touched him a spark of electricity shot between them, even something as simple as touching her the way he was now had her aching to rub back against him. Not able to concentrate on anything that was happening on the television, her eyes fell closed as she focused on the body behind her. 

Itching to roll her tiny frame back underneath him, he was never more glad that his sister and Lindsey sat mere feet away. No matter how many times he kept repeating that they were just friends, he couldn't seem to stop his body's response. Maybe it was lack of sex, maybe it was something else, but he wanted her, and the only thing that was keeping him from telling her that, was the fact that, for once in his life he cared more about the girl than himself. 

"I put my bag in your room," she murmured quietly, "Just in case Cordy and Lindsey wanted to stay the night."

Dear lord he was going to need a fucking miracle to make it through tonight with her next to him, but no matter how torturous it was, he would rather have her next to him than down the hall in some guest room. "I might be starting to like you there," he mumbled, his lips pressed to the top of her hair. 

She wasn't sure what to say to that, so instead she turned to face him, forcing him to his back, she curled back against him, pillowing her head against his chest. Slipping her hand beneath his shirt, her fingers returned to the same spot she'd discovered at the pool. Tracing the permanent reminder of the night that would follow them forever, she drifted off listening to the sound of his heart beat.

OoOoO

She woke up to Angel shaking like a damn leaf next to her, sitting up, she knew with one glance at him what was wrong. The nightmares were her least favorite reminder of that night, she knew exactly what it was like to jolt awake, the images from that night fresh in your mind. "I-I'm sorry," he stuttered. "I didn't want to wake you." 

Her heart broke, "It's okay," she stroked his brow, whispering softly. "I'm glad I woke up, I wouldn't want you to feel like this alone." 

"Do you want to talk about it," she asked, her fingers running through his hair. 

His eyes squeezed shut, he shook his head, tightening his arms around her. "It was just a nightmare, I'm right here," she told him as though she already knew the origin of his fears. He was back there, that night, except this time he wasn't able to save her. No one really knew the extent of his problem with sleeping, when a grown man told you he had nightmares, well most people tended just to nod their head a lot. Plus whenever something like this happened, he would usually excuse himself to the confines of his own room, but he couldn't stand the thought of leaving her alone. 

She had never been the person comforting someone after a nightmare before. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do exactly, but she tried to make sure he knew she was there. Held firmly against him, she continued to play with his hair, and trail her fingers over the stubble on his jaw until eventually he seemed to calm some. She could still feel the slightest tremble coursing through him even as his breath began to even out. As hard as it was, sometimes the best thing to get rid of the nightmarish images was to fall back into that dark abyss. Of course sometimes it only made the next dream that much worse, but when you were like them you just had to roll the dice and choose the option that sucked less. 

Trying to make sure that she was there if he woke up again, she stayed awake for as long as she could, but eventually sleep won out, and the next thing she knew her eyes were fluttering open as the first rays of sunlight danced across her face. Angel's arms still held her firmly against him, their limbs a tangled mess, she could feel his warm breath tickling her cheek. She wasn't sure what happened to Lindsey and Cordelia, they were either in the guestroom or they cut out after her and Angel fell asleep, but they weren't there when she woke up in the middle of the night either. 

Shifting in his arms, she stretched around him as best she could. Watching him sleep, she found herself lost in thought, venturing down that forbidden path of what ifs. She couldn't seem to help herself as she laid there beside him, her heart already starting to beat a little faster inside of her chest as she remembered about how the previous morning had gone between them, right here in this very bed, as she began thinking about how warm and perfect it felt to be wrapped up in his arms like this. She wondered what it would be to let herself get lost in him, to be one more notch on his impressive bedpost. She was certain this budding friendship they had going on couldn't withstand something of that nature but it didn't stop her from fantasizing about it all the same. Or from letting her mind try to imagine some universe in which there could be more to them than being strictly friends and how it would put an ache inside of her chest. 

While Angel may not have have a good history with having friends of the opposite sex, at least not in these past several years, she was all too aware that how they were with one another was outside of the norm. Nothing anywhere close to this would be happening with someone such as Xander or with Oz, she wouldn't be falling asleep in just a friends' arms, making out with them in their bed, or any of the other things that had come so naturally with him. Of course everything was destined to be different with Angel than anyone else in her life... but she hadn't been prepared for any of this. Even their previous weekend together felt like leaps and bounds from what this one had turned out to be. 

It felt too natural to be here, in his space, in his life... Her insides would swirl around every time he would groan and grumble about her bringing up this whole idea that he needed to find someone to go out on a date with, how he would always turn it back around to her, that he didn't want to spend time with someone else because it would only interrupt and take away from them being able to hang out, or how every time she thought of something that sounded fun and would throw it out there he'd easily turn it down and tell her she was the one he wanted to go to those activities with. She couldn't seem to help those bubbles of hopefulness that maybe somehow they would fall into something more. 

She also couldn't help that other side of her that screamed at her to stop, to shove them away as fast and as hard as she possibly could. 

As Angel's eyes began fluttering open, she smiled back at him, one hand sliding up to his cheek. Angel pulled her even closer, his nose burying in the crook of her neck and Buffy had to bite back a small moan as he pressed his lips against her flesh and whispered a tired sounding "Good morning." 

"Hi," she whispered back to him. 

"I like waking up next to you," he whispered and she felt a tight squeeze in her chest. 

"Mmm," she swallowed hard, "Well you better soak it up because I have to leave later this afternoon," she tried to joke. 

He shook his head against her. "We're going to pretend you're not mmk?"

Buffy laughed a little and rested her head against him. "Did you have any more nightmares?" she asked and Angel shook his head again. 

"What do you think you wanna do today?"

Buffy closed her eyes and thought about that for a moment. "I don't know, we still have to find you a girl you know. Maybe we could go out for breakfast and decide on something with some food in our bellies?" 

"I'm okay with almost all of that," he mumbled and she laughed again. 

"Is it okay if I borrow your bathtub first though to get ready?"

Angel pulled back to look at her funny. "Well, yeah. You're free to use or do whatever you want." 

"That does include me having to get up though."

His eyes narrowed. "Maybe I take that back." 

OoOoO

After a quick rinse then soaking in his large garden tub for nearly an hour, Buffy finished getting dressed and untangled her wet hair before going to find Angel again. She stopped breathing for a moment when he slid a cup of coffee in front of her as one arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her body back against his. He just breathed her in before softly telling her he'd be right back. 

Swallowing, she glanced over her shoulder as he started walking away and earned a wink from him before he disappeared off toward the bedroom. 

Grabbing her phone, she bit her bottom lip as she answered a quick text message from her mom and then began scrolling through restaurants close to Angel's house. 

She finished about half of her cup before they were both ready to head out, Angel's fingers reaching for hers as they headed out the door and back toward his car. 

OoOoO

Buffy blushed a little as Angel pulled her onto his lap as they waited for a table or booth to open up for them. "I think we're about to have a repeat situation of the pool if you keep that up," she giggled as he planted random kisses on the back of her shoulder and the back of her head. 

"What?" 

"Well, it might be a little hard for someone to wrap their head around agreeing to going out to dinner with you after seeing you all flirty over here with me."

"Mmm, and that is a bad thing how?" he asked, starting to spin the wobbly chair a little. "And just what do you think is going to happen with you sleeping in my bed when you come out and..."

"Well obviously that's not going to happen when you're off being with someone, dumbass."

"Mmm, nope, don't like that," he barely got out before their waitresses came over to get them settled in the booth that opened up in the back. "What are you getting?" he asked, opening his menu. 

"We just got here!" 

"Oh, don't act like you didn't look at their menu online and already settled on what you want. You're just looking through that to do it." 

Buffy felt her cheeks staining a little red again. "Stop picking up on my habits!" 

Angel smirked. "Never! So what are you getting so I can figure out what I want and we can mix and match," he told her and she rolled her eyes up to the ceiling. He was impossible. "And then I'm going to send you over to that wall with all those brochures so you can figure out what the hell you want to do after we're done here." 

Buffy glanced over seeing advertisements for all sorts of attractions... various shows they could go see, theme parks in the area, different zoos and aquariums, adventure quests... LA was always harder to decide on than Sunnydale when she would come out for a day trip or something. There were just so many choices but always so little time.


	7. Chapter Seven

"Oh my gosh, look at that one," she exclaimed, peering through the thick glass of the gorilla exhibit. 

His arms wrapped firmly around her, his chin rested on top of her head as he looked across the enclosure to the silverback pounding on his chest. He had definitely been right, she'd had way more fun here with him than she would of, had she been with Xander or Willow. Still, it seemed like every minute that passed they were venturing further and further away from those friends they claimed to be. Not that she was complaining, but the stirring she felt inside her only seemed to be growing stronger as the day wore on, and Angel certainly wasn't helping matters. She hadn't even been able to bring herself to point out any of the dozens of girls they'd passed today, the thought of him with someone else simply too much to bare after the last couple of days. 

He knew that he was pushing boundaries and crossing lines with damn near every move he made, but ever since he woke up with her in his arms again this morning, he'd felt a shift between them. In the few days he'd known her she had managed to wedge herself into a part of him he wasn't sure still existed. It was no secret he had a way with women, but whenever he was around her, he didn't even have to try. It felt like there was some invisible force drawing him to her, without even realizing what he was doing he would find himself pressed back up against her. There were a few times he'd even caught himself leaning in to kiss her, but luckily he'd managed to get ahold of himself at the last second. She wasn't exactly pushing him off of her, but he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable either. 

Twisting in his arms, she took a piece of the blue cotton candy she was holding and popped it in his mouth, "What are you doing next weekend," he asked, taking another bite of the candied sugar from her fingers.

Rolling her eyes she smiled up at him, "Smooth," she teased. "I think I may send my mother into a coronary, if she found out I was going to be gone for another weekend." Sighing, she draped her arms around his neck, "Besides, like I said, you're bound to get tired of me sooner or later." 

He wasn't sure that was possible, "I doubt it," he told her, lifting her off the ground just enough to spin them around. 

"You really can't come out next weekend," he asked as they began to make their way through to another part of the zoo. 

Squeezing his hand, she shook her head. "Like I said Mom would freak, and Saturday is Willow's birthday, Oz has this whole thing planned for her at the Bronze." 

"The Bronze?" 

She nodded, "It's this club, it's nothing like the ones out here though. It's got more of a everybody knows everybody vibe."

"It sounds nice." 

"Then I'm explaining it wrong," she grimaced. She had been dreading this conversation all day, she knew the wheels were already spinning that head of his, trying to figure out a way to get her back out here. 

"Two weeks is a long time," he muttered as they walked up to look at the penguins. Their keeper was out throwing fish causing them to do all sorts of flips and dives into their little pond. 

She wasn't anymore excited about it herself, but she knew it wasn't realistic to think she could run off to Los Angeles every weekend either. "Two week huh," she asked, biting back a grin. 

"Well ya," he paused."I mean unless you don't want too," he hurried, his face wrinkling with lines of worry. 

Wrapping her arms around him, she smiled, "Relax, I want too." 

She wasn't sure what he said next, suddenly too transfixed on their close proximity, the sound of her own heartbeat drumming in her ears. The animals, the people, the noise, it all seemed to fade away when her eyes locked with his. She didn't even know which one of them were moving as she watched, her eyes flickering down to his lips as they slowly drew closer.

Her eyes had barely drifted close when a splash of freezing water had them both pulling apart. Looking around they saw the animal trainer laughing as she pointed to the red line painted on the ground, indicating the splash zone. 

Blushing, she tugged on his arm, laughing as she pulled him away from their new audience. She couldn't believe that almost happened again, but then again, she couldn't believe it didn't happen either. 

Everything in him was screaming at him to grab her in his arms and finish what he started. "We should probably stop doing that," she sighed, as they stepped off to the side of the little pathway they were on. 

That was the last fucking thing he wanted to do, "Stop doing what," he asked, his arms circling her to pull her back against him. 

She turned her head to glare at him. "Friends aren't supposed to kiss," she whispered, her voice far lower than she'd intended. 

Leaning his forehead down to rest on hers, he closed his eyes as he touched his lips to the corner of her cheek. "Maybe I like you." 

She swallowed hard, "Maybe." 

OoOoO

They spent the next few hours trekking from one side of the zoo to the other. She had insisted that they get to every animal before closing time, one thing was for certain, she did not like snakes. She'd basically walked through the entire reptile exhibit with her face buried against him, not that he was complaining. When she picked up the little pamphlet about the zoo this morning, he couldn't say he was exactly thrilled with the idea of roaming around to look at various animals, but to his surprise the day had turned out to be rather fun. Although he was fairly certain if given the opportunity she could make anything more enjoyable. 

Trying to ignore the fact that she had to go back to Sunnydale tonight, she dragged him to every single exhibit that the zoo offered. She had even pushed back her fear of creepy crawlies and ventured into the damn reptile exhibit, knowing once they parted ways later she'd want those moments back. In all reality it hadn't ended up being that bad, snuggled up against his hard chest, and he definitely didn't seem to mind. She knew that they needed to address what was going on between them, but she did not want to be the one to bring that up. Nor did she even know how to go about it. She knew any thought of them outside of being just friends was preposterous, but the more time she spent with him, the harder it was to get that message across. Angel didn't get involved with women like that, and it would be dumb of her to think that she was any sort of exception. Letting herself go there would only result in heart ache. They were friends, he was a flirt, and that was just something she was going to have to learn to get used too. 

Somehow.

Right now nothing on the planet sounded harder though. 

OoOoO

Even though she hated driving when it was dark outside, Buffy found herself lingering to actually leave Angel's side. They eventually made it out of the zoo and after insisting she needed several of the items from the gift shop, and her convincing him into getting a matching t-shirt, she'd easily agreed to grabbing milkshakes at a drive thru before going back to his place for dinner. 

Angel warned her he wasn't the best cook in the world but there were a handful of meals he could manage alright, and while he was busy whipping their final meal for this little weekend getaway, she had busied herself up by making sure she had all of her things together, everything packed back away, all of her clothes collected from his washer and dryer, the souvenirs all stacked up beside her bag. 

Buffy's eyes lingered on his bed, dreading the idea of not being able to fall asleep with him tonight much more than a person should. 

"Hey." Buffy nearly jumped, then a blush crept up her cheeks as she knew she'd just been caught looking quite longingly at his bed. "You could stay," he told her next, a cheeky grin forming on that too handsome face of his. 

"I absolutely could not," she argued back playfully. "I have work and a life to get back to."

"Mmm, but that's not nearly as much fun as hanging around with me."

"Maybe you have me there, but it's still where I need to be."

He grumbled a little before wrapping his arms around her and swaying back and forth for a moment. "I will miss you, though," he whispered in her ear, making goosebumps raise up on her arms. 

"It's not like we won't talk. There's phone calls and text messages and e-mails and all of that fun stuff."

"Yeah, but it's not the same," he told her and she knew how true those words happened to be. Two weeks until she was around him again felt like it would be a miracle to get through. "I better go check on the food, I was just seeing what you were up to," he told her next, kissing the top of her head before pulling away. 

Buffy gave herself an extra moment to get herself together before following him back out. She put the television on for some background noise and asked if there was anything she could do to help only to be told to sit down and relax. Unable to help herself, though, she set the table as he was almost finished and started getting them drinks together while they just continued to chat about their day at the zoo, what they had planned for their weeks ahead. 

"Cordelia told me I should give you her number again in case you no longer had it, and Lindsey's. Not that I suggest opening up conversation with either one of them as I am sure you know how that will go," he said with a slight shake of his head. 

"That's sweet of them though."

"That's how it starts," he grumbled before announcing dinner was done and it wasn't long until they were eating, both complaining about a storyline on the show that started to play almost as soon as they sat down. 

OoOoO

Buffy rolled her eyes, quickly wiping away the trace of tears starting to form as Angel finished putting her things in the back of the trunk and closed it shut. She let out a shaky breath and told herself to get it together, it wasn't like she was saying goodbye to him forever, and it wasn't worth embarrassing herself with the sudden onset of emotions over, she silently reminded herself. 

Checking her reflection real quick, she roamed around to the back of the car and was soon wrapped up in him again, his body hugging her tightly to his. Jumping up, she wrapped her legs around his waist and he helped settle her on the edge of the trunk. "Thank you for coming and spending the weekend with me," Angel told her, his head still buried against her. 

"There's nowhere else I would have rather been."

She could feel him smile against her as he just silently continued to hold her for a few minutes more. When he pulled back he sighed, looking over at the front of his house. "That club... is that the same one? The one your birthday was supposed to be set up at?"

Buffy swallowed hard and nodded her head. "Yeah," she breathed out. "Part of me keeps biting my tongue about wanting to say you could come to Sunnydale for next weekend. Obviously we can't just go back and forth spending every single weekend with one another, and I am sure you will be happy for the break from me no matter what you want to go around saying, but yeah... I could see the issue with inviting you to town, for a birthday party, for a girl you don't even know..."

He made a noise and kept staring off for a bit. When he did look back at her, Buffy found herself holding her breath. "I hate that we met how we did," he told her. "Well, not the meeting itself because that was fine," he told her with a hint of a smile, "Those whole ten? Fifteen minutes there? Those were fine but... I hate how everything wound up going for an endless amount of reasons. And yet only when I'm around you do I find any silver lining to that night."

Buffy felt tears swelling up again and Angel suddenly looked panicked which made her choke up a laugh. "I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to end this on a down note or make you upset."

Buffy wiped her face again and shook her head, pulling him back to her. "You're not," she told him, hugging his neck tightly. "I'm just really going to miss you and all of this."

OoOoO

Buffy's fingers brushed up against his as he finished walking her back to the driver's side door, her phone going off from its place on the charger. "I'm sure that is my mother again asking me if I'm on the road yet."

"I guess I gotta let you go before she follows through on that search party and police escort back to your house threat," he said, even as he pulled her closer, telling himself one last hug and one final goodbye then he'd make sure she got in the car. 

When he went to force himself into pulling away from her and was just starting to open his mouth to tell her to be careful and let him know when she got back home safe and sound, Buffy's fingers that were flirting with the top of the waistband of his shorts, just under his shirt, pulled at him tighter, back to her. 

Looking down at her just as her eyes fluttered to meet his, he felt the world starting to spin. He didn't know what was happening as he pinned her body between his and the vehicle, as she placed her fingers around him, or as she closed the distance between them. 

But the second he felt her lips brush up against his own, everything around them seem to disappeat as he absolutely melted into her. The world seemed to right itself again, the feeling of spinning finally stopped as he finally slipped his tongue out to taste hers. He tried to push every single thought from his mind, tried to commit every detail to memory, already knowing this moment would be over far too soon. All the blood that previously occupied his head seemed to rush in a different direction as he moved his arms around her, pulling her closer. He'd kissed dozens of girls, hundreds maybe, and not once had he ever experienced anything close to this. His entire being pulsed with need, he had half the mind to drag her right back inside his place and let her Mom call the damn police. 

She hadn't intended to kiss him, but when he went to pull away from her, it was just a natural reaction to pull him back. She wasn't sure why she was having such an issue with this goodbye, she'd been just about to laugh or crack some joke about her lame ass inability to let him go when something between them seemed to snap. 

Panicked at her mistake, she went to pull away but he simply groaned, pulling her in closer. Not having the strength to try again, she surrendered, letting herself get lost in the moment. 

Damn near panting, he forced himself to pull back away, before the thin grips he had on self control completely vanished. "You have to go," he panted before pressing his lips to hers one more time. 

"I could stay," she broke away moaning, but he quickly shook his head. "I want you Buffy, and if you stay here I can't be held accountable for my actions," he groaned, working his way down the slope of her neck. 

It took him feeling her tiny hands work their way back under his shirt for him to finally break away. He wanted her more than he remembered ever wanting anyone in his life, but he couldn't do that, not to her. He couldn't add her to that endless list of girls he'd taken to bed. 

She deserved more than that, so fucking much more. 

Her senses returning, her mind began to race as Angel all but guided her into the driver's seat. Fastening her seatbelt, she looked up at him not sure what in the hell she was supposed to say. He still looked stunned, and that definitely didn’t do anything to calm her nerves. 

"Call me when you get home," he asked, his arms braced on either side of her window. 

She nodded her head, "Promise." 

"Be careful."

She nodded again, "Always."

She watched as he stood there, gripping the top of her car, obviously conflicted. She would never admit it, but a part of her desperately wanted to hear him ask her to stay. Eventually though, he seemed to come to some sort of decision, pushing off her car, he took a couple of steps back and watched her silently until she pulled off.

OoOoO

She didn't even begin to pull herself together until she was almost half way home. Her mind spinning, she didn't even know what to think. One second she would get lost in some fantasy, in the memory of kissing him, and the next she would be panicking berating herself for being so fucking stupid. Grabbing her phone from the console, she quickly went to her contact, dialing the only person she could think of. Not even realizing the time until after she hit call, she had almost decided to hang up when she heard someone's voice on the other end of the line. 

"I just kissed your brother, please don't think I'm some big hoe," she rushed out before promptly slapping a hand over her own mouth. 

Then she thought she was going to die when the sound of Lindsey's laughter filled her car. "Buffy," Cordelia asked, confused. 

She groaned, "Is it too late for me to tell you no?" 

She heard some sort of scuffle then Lindsey's voice came on the line. "Trust me gorgeous, you got to do a lot more to Angel before you gain that title." 

Making some strangled noise in the back of her throat, she sighed. "I just screwed everything up didn't I?"

The last fucking place he wanted to be was standing was in the middle of Angel and any of his conquests, especially this one. Still, much to his surprise he found that he really liked this girl, and it was clear Angel had some sort of feelings for the chick. "Well I don't know sweetheart, did he kiss you back?" 

Chewing her bottom lip, she nodded her head before realizing that they couldn't in fact see her. "Ya, I mean, I think so," she added. 

Lindsey laughed again, "You think so?" 

"Uh-huh." 

Lindsey wrapped his arms back around his girlfriend who looked like she was about ready to hurl. "Well then I dunno know what you've got yourself all worked up about darlin', I mean didn't Cordy walk in on the same thing happening just yesterday?"

Hand on her forehead, she sighed, "That was different," she whined. 

"How?" 

"Because, we weren't even really kissing then, we were about to kiss," she stressed. 

He wasn't sure he had ever met a girl more adorable, Angel better be glad he was already involved with Cordy, otherwise he would give him a run for his money. "Uh-huh." 

"Lindsey you are not helping." 

He couldn't help but chuckle again, "What exactly is it you want me to say? You kissed him, so what? If I were you I wouldn't be worried about some kiss the two of you shared, 'cause we all know that man has had his fair share of those. Now what you should be worried about is the fact that Liam Angelus Chase has had you in his bed for two nights, and somehow managed to keep it in his pants," he sighed again, "He likes you Buffy." 

She was back to shaking her head, "What am I supposed to do?" 

"Hell I don't know, what the hell are you asking me for, what do you want to do?"

That was the question of the hour, she had no idea. "I don't know," she yelped. "That's why I'm calling you." Ya she was insanely attracted to him, but who wouldn't be. Just because they kissed didn't mean that anything had changed between them, not really. He was still the same man who went through more women than socks, and she was still Buffy, the girl that avoided any sort attention from the opposite sex. They were friends, they needed to stay friends, and in order for them to do that she had to get the memory of kissing him out of her damn mind. 

Lindsey rolled his eyes, never in his wildest dreams did he imagine he would be talking one of Angel's flings off the cliff. "You're overreacting, it's just Angel and a kiss isn't some death sentence. But I'm tellin' ya this... maybe you should eventually sit down and really think about this whole what should I do, what do I want to do business. That's just my advice."

"None of this was even supposed to happen," she groaned. 

"You can't help fate, Sweetheart. You don't get all that much control in deciding who you find yourself liking or not."

Buffy felt a little stabbing pain go through her chest. "Yeah, well, my history record on guys I've liked isn't exactly great. And I don't see how developing a schoolgirl crush on the unattainable is going much in the right direction."

"Buffy?" she heard Cordelia's voice come through. 

"Yeah?" Buffy all but squeaked out. 

The other end of the line was silent for a long time, Buffy growing more and more nervous with every passing second. "As Lindsey pointed out, and as we both mentioned countless times before just right now, Angel likes you. He may not want to admit that he does and he is probably freaking out in his own right, right about now, and he's not going to know what to do with that information. He hasn't given more thought to anyone beyond how do I get this girl in my bed and then right back out in a very long time. Obviously everything is different with you, he likes actually being around you and doing things with you... beyond things that involve naked bodies."

"Maybe. But that doesn't mean-"

"Yes it does!" both Lindsey and Cordelia said in unison. 

"I'm pretty sure he's not opposed to some of those naked body activities though," Lindsey chuckled and Buffy started to blush. 

"Ew!" Cordy shouted and Buffy could hear the sound of her smacking him. 

"But what I am getting at!" Lindsey continued, "Is that he wants more than just those unspeakable activities with you."

"And that is unheard of at this point," Cordelia joined back in. "He likes you," she stressed again. 

OoOoO

Buffy was just getting off the phone with the two of them as she pulled into the driveway of her duplex, unsure of how she even made it home through all of the craziness of them, her own head, not even worrying once since being in the car about how late or dark it was as she made it from LA back to Sunnydale. 

She breathed out as she grabbed her phone to text Angel and tell him she had made it home. Catching a glimpse of herself in the rearview mirror, Buffy blushed at the face looking back at her. Cordelia and Lindsey had her burning up nearly the entire time, her heart racing as Cordelia went on and on about how she knew they both had feelings growing for one another in spite of or because of what had happened that night three years ago, her take on how she saw everything. Cordelia had touched on her concerns about him and her if they decide to own up to what everyone else saw happening but she and Lindsey both advised her to figure out what she wanted before anything got too out of hand. 

It was all a lot to take in. 

Her heart raced as she even thought of the idea of what they were saying being true, of what if no matter how many times she tried repeating that she was nothing special to change his mind about giving up any woman he could possibly want to settle down for just one.. what that might look like. It wasn't as though he had made his attraction to her hidden, nor anytime she mentioned about him going on a date with someone he would turn it around to he wanted to go with her... but still... 

It was Angel.

Buffy nearly jumped out of her skin as her phone started to ring, she closed her eyes as she answered it, trying to keep her voice from shaking. 

"You made it home?" Angel asked for confirmation. 

"Yeah, just a minute ago. Still sitting in my driveway."

"You okay?" 

Buffy swallowed, deciding she could let either Lindsey or Cordy fill him in on her little freak out phone call. "Yeah, I was just letting everyone know I was back in town," she covered. "I still need to call my Mom though but I'll grab my bags and get to her."

"Okay," he told her. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright." Chewing on her bottom lip, she shook her head at the smiling reflection in the mirror. "I'll let you get settled back at your place but if you want in case you miss me too much and can't fall asleep or something you can call me, okay?"

Buffy chuckled at him. "Okay, I appreciate the offer." 

"Alright," he said slowly before wishing her a good night in case she didn't wind up calling him. 

"I do miss you," she whispered out and her heart swelled as he told her he was laying in bed trying to sleep and having trouble drifting off without her there, and also with waiting to make sure she got back alright. 

Sending a few more quick messages, she opened the door and stood up, hating the sudden fear that rushed over her. "You're fine," she whispered as her eyes took in the shadows. Grabbing her keys tighter, she decided the bags could wait until daylight and hurried to go unlock her front door, get inside, and let herself calm down a little before assuring Joyce that she was perfectly fine and promising to swing by and see her as soon as possible. 

"Did you have a nice time, though?" Joyce asked. 

It took all she had not to squeal. "It was perfect," Buffy told her. "I can't wait to show you more of the pictures and gossip about it all."


	8. Chapter Eight

As she finally started to drift off to sleep, Buffy filled her mind with memories of what it was like to be next to Angel, how he felt, how he tasted when they had kissed. 

She knew she had more than enough baggage to spare her own self, not being able to be with anyone outside of Riley since what had happened, being too afraid to even really want to be. She had gotten used to being alone, even the idea that she might possibly always be. But she could look at Angel and all those fears and worries that she normally had just weren't there with him. In many ways she knew he would understand her better than anyone else ever could. He would be better equipped to deal with her fallout problems from what happened that night. She didn't have to worry about being afraid of him either, of logically knowing it wasn't like everyone she dated were going to turn out crazy but it didn't stop her from panicking over the idea anyway with others. 

She didn't think everything would be one hundred percent smooth sailing with Angel either but it was so different around him. He felt like home. She felt happier, safer, more like herself than she'd been in years, she didn't have to pretend with him, he made her feel normal. 

OoOoO

Angel sat across from Lindsey and Cordelia in his living room, they were both coming at him like this was some sort of interrogation. He had no idea why she was so worked up over this, and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why Lindsey was going along with it. 

"I just don't feel like going out," he repeated for the third time. Cordy had been on his case all week to get off the phone and "join them in the land of the living" for a night, but the last thing he wanted to do was go out to some sleazy ass bar where he was bound to be around at least one girl he'd slept with. Especially not when the only girl he cared about was ninety miles away, driving home from work. 

"Angel, she lives in Sunnydale. You've kissed her once, it is not healthy for the two of you to be this attached."

He snorted, she'd been riding his ass for years to change his ways, and here he was actually fucking trying and she still found something to nag him about. He loved her but damn there were sometimes he really couldn't stand her. "We're not too attached," he sighed. 

"Oh Please, you're not attached?"Her eyes widened in disbelief. "You look like you haven't slept in a week." 

"Look I understand where you're coming from - sort of- but I am telling you, there's nothing to worry about. This isn't just some random girl I picked up, it's Buffy. We're just trying to figure things out." He sighed, "Which speaking of, I should probably tell you that I won’t be here this weekend." 

That got Lindsey's attention, he didn't much care what the hell Angel chose to do in his free time, but that little blonde of his had somehow managed to tap into his protective side, he just wanted to make sure she wasn't going to get hurt. He cocked a grin, "You goin' to Sunnydale?"

"I am."

Cordy grimaced. "Eww, why?"

"It's Willow's birthday, I didn't want her to go alone." 

"Uh-huh." The mere thought of that town made her sick to her stomach, that was probably her least favorite thing about her brothers new little love interest, her ties to Xander Harries. 

"Well I personally think it's a great idea." Lindsey leaned back on the sofa, hell the more time those two spent together the better. He couldn't wait to see her turn his life upside down, Angel had no idea what he was in for, and he couldn't wait to see the show. 

That man didn't stand a chance. 

OoOoO

Checking her watch for the tenth time in the last hour, she couldn't wait for this day to be over. Well she didn't necessarily want it to be over, but knowing Angel was coming today made it that much harder to focus on anything work related. Add to it all the sleep she missed, and she was basically worthless, but she wouldn't change a thing. When Angel first started hinting around about coming to visit, she hadn't payed it much attention, not wanting to force him into a situation he wasn't comfortable with. 

Though they had barely made it through half the week before he called her one morning before work. He wouldn't stop going on about how he didn't feel comfortable knowing she was going to Willow's party by herself. Which normally, with any other guy that would have been a huge red flag, but he wasn't just  _ some guy _ . He was Angel, plus she was pretty sure he'd had some sort of nightmare, she could hear it in his voice. 

Still, she had a hard time processing the fact that he had actually agreed. A party, the bronze, it was all too familiar. 

Even she felt that familiar rush of anxiety when she let herself start comparing all the similarities to that night. She couldn't go there though, not today. The last thing she wanted to do was turn into some emotional basket case hours before he arrived. 

OoOoO

Cordelia huffed, "You do realize what happened the last time he had plans to go to some girls birthday party at the Bronze right??" 

"Babe, you can't really believe any of that's going to happen again. History’s not going to repeat itself, Angel's going to be fine, he's not going to get shot again, no one is going to attack them. Hell knowing your brother, I'll be surprised if they even make it to the party." 

She shoved at his arm from the passenger seat, "Gross." 

He chuckled, "I'm just sayin', they could barely keep their hands off each other last weekend and that was while they were "just friends". Now that they've both admitted that there might be something more goin' on, well let's just say I won’t be walking into the house unannounced anymore." 

Cordelia sighed, looking out the window she said a quick prayer that all of this worked out. That whatever was brewing between the two of them didn't send him spiraling back down that hole he'd worked so hard to claw his way out of. He liked to put on this whole big, stuff guy exterior, but underneath it all he was nothing but a freaking big cuddly teddy bear. 

"He still hasn't told Mom and Dad." 

Lindsey slammed on the breaks, having not gotten used to the new stop sign that had been put in by their house. "Sheesh woman, give the man some time. What's he supposed to do? Call up Mommy and Daddy every time he likes someone?" 

"Well no," she rolled her eyes. "But I'm sure they wouldn't exactly be thrilled to hear about his little weekend adventure either. At least not the Sunnydale bits." 

"You can't tell me that your Dad's not going to fall in love with that girl the moment he sees the way she has Angel wrapped around her finger." 

Of course her parents were going to love Buffy, they would love anyone that he brought home. Their Mom had been waiting for that moment ever since he broke it off with that weird cop chick he dated after college. Buffy was definitely better than her. "Ya, I guess," she yawned. Not having fully recovered from her own unmentionable activities. 

OoOoO

Angel walked through his house one last time as he tried to make sure that he hadn't forgotten anything. He'd mostly packed everything last night, knowing that once he got home from work, he would have to hurry and get back on the road if he had any hope at beating traffic. Though judging how the roads were when he left the office, he wasn't holding out much hope. Already the app on his phone was telling him to expect no less than two thirty minute delays. At this point he would be lucky to make it to her place by dark. It may be only ninety miles, but that could easily turn into four hours drive time around Los Angeles. 

Grabbing the bag he packed, he made sure all the lights were off throughout the house before heading for the front door. Making sure the door was locked next, he paused to pull out his phone to let both Cordelia then Buffy know that he was just heading out before making his way back to the car.

OoOoO

Getting closer and closer to Sunnydale, Angel found it harder to try and keep his mind off of the events from three years ago. Back when he was still trying to get out of LA he could be fed up with traffic and worried he was going to be late if not miss the majority of Buffy's friends' party but the further he got out of the city the less distraction he seemed to be able to cling on to. 

He tried focusing on his breathing, turning the music up louder, even calling Cordelia at one point but he quickly found that only brought him more into the past by having her voice in the car with him again. It didn't help with her trying to talk him out of going through with any of this one last time either so that conversation hadn't lasted long. 

Next he tried talking to himself out loud in the car, telling himself a few times over that everything was going to be okay, reminding himself that this was three years later, the asshole who'd ruined his life was locked up and wasn't going to making any surprise appearances. He pointed out that he was very much not in the back seat of Xander Harris' car right now, he wasn't half listening to him and Cordelia talk about nonsense as he just looked out the window and tried to remember why he had agreed to crash some girls' birthday. Angel told himself that he was going to be fine, that Buffy was fine... but as the city limits sign came into view it didn't seem to help any longer. 

After about fifteen minutes of trying to get it back together, Angel pulled his phone out to call Buffy, trying his best to keep his voice even as she answered. "Hey," he breathed out. "Uh, I know you said you didn't mind waiting for me to get there but I don't want you to be late for the whole thing."

"It's fine, Angel. There's still time, you're fine. Did you get stuck in traffic again? Or behind a tractor or something like I was the other day?"

"No, I'm just... just having a moment," he told her. Sighing, he pushed off from the front of the car to walk around a little again. The fresh air was helping a little at least. 

"Oh," she replied softly before asking him what all was going on. He debated about it quickly, not wanting her to start worrying about comparisons with that night any more or make her feel bad about him coming out or anything, but finally he breathed out the words about the urge to panic and fighting this mental block about crossing into her small town here. "Where are you?" she asked when he was done. 

"Uhh, less than a mile from the Welcome To Sunnydale sign. I'll figure it out," he promised. 

Buffy was silent for a moment, "Just stay on the phone with me," she offered. "Get past the sign and to that first light and you're going to go the complete opposite way, maybe that'll help?"

Breathing out again, he listened to her start to jump into small talk, telling him about her day, more about the friends he was going to be meeting tonight while he got back in the driver's seat and slowly started to ease back onto the road. His mind started shooting through random memories of that night, almost in a series of bright flashes, but he managed to keep going. 

OoOoO

Angel was sure he didn't really breathe again until he was standing in the driveway, Buffy all but throwing herself into his arms again. Buffy's legs wrapped around his waist, her arms circling around his neck, and he spun them both until her back was pushed against the side of his car, mimicking many of their last moments together from the previous weekend. 

Buffy's chest heaved up and down against him, their eyes locking before she pulled him closer. Angel's eyelids lowered slowly, all of his focus going to the taste of her as she pressed her lips to his. His hands slid up her thighs, daring to venture under the hem of the tiny excuse of a dress she was wearing, fingertips greedily taking in all of her that he could. His body pressed harder into her, and he ate up the sound of her moaning, taking the opportunity to slip his tongue into her mouth. 

In the past several days he'd almost convinced himself he was imagining it all as he thought back to their weekend together, how well she fit against him, how close to heaven she felt, how he was sure he could get drunk off the taste of her... but right now proved all of those memories true. 

And that was both thrilling and terrifying. 

As was the idea of trying to address all of this at some point. He couldn't think of a single reason why this seemingly perfect woman in his arms would want him in all the ways he couldn't help but want her... and he was pretty sure he would wind up talking her out of any of it more than anything else by the end of that conversation. She was endlessly better than anything he could give her and he knew it, didn't stop the feelings growing inside of him any despite that knowledge though.

Hearing her phone go off from the railing to the porch where she'd left it to come out here to greet him, Buffy looked around a little dazed as they pulled away from one another. "D-do you want to put your bag inside before we go?" she finally asked as he began lowering her back to the ground. 

"I can do that," he nodded. 

Buffy ran to see who had called and was only on there for what felt like a few seconds while he grabbed his duffel bag from the back and followed her up. 

"I, um, I don't have a spare bedroom here actually," she told him nervously as they entered the duplex. She hadn't said anything exact about their sleeping arrangements when they had decided on him coming out to see her this weekend and he hadn't let his mind wander too far on that trail of thoughts either. 

"I can take a few nights on a couch," he told her, not wanting to make her uncomfortable. "I think I have a rolled up sleeping bag in the corner of my trunk, too, so I mean, I can take a floor... or a spot in the backyard," he joked and she rolled her eyes at him. 

"I can just imagine the phone call I would get from your sister if I allowed that to happen."

Setting it down on the floor in front of the couch, he decided that could wait, too. 

OoOoO 

Buffy had offered to drive, but now that he was here, his mind wasn't as occupied with thoughts of that terrible night. Finding her hand in the darkness of the car, he twined their fingers together across the console as he listened to her go on about who all was supposed to be there, no doubt in an effort to distract him further. Though he had to admit, he already felt better driving around this town with her next to him, at least when his thoughts began to race he could look up and know that she was okay. 

She pointed out the cinema, the high school she had attended, and a few other little shops along the way. It was strange having him back here, in her world. It definitely made her feel like their friendship, or whatever it was they were doing, was being cemented somehow. She knew being here, in this town couldn't be easy on him, and that fact was only proven on his drive out. Still, it made her heart flutter a bit to know that he had come, that he'd done it all for her, even if she wasn't sure what to make of it. 

"What's wrong," he glanced over, noticing she'd gone quiet. 

She sighed, "I was just thinking about how strange it feels having you back here." 

A look of concern crossed his features. 

"Not-Not strange in a bad way," she quickly added. "I like it, I missed you... it's just never in a million years did I ever think you would want to come back here. This town, my friends, heck even the Bronze, it's basically all one giant trigger in our world," she paused, "I guess I'm just having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that you even wanted to come in the first place. Let alone that you actually showed up." 

Arriving at their destination, well according to his phone anyway, he finished easing into one of the parking spots next to the warehouses."You know, I never really imagined I would come back here either, and as you witnessed, up until the moment I stepped onto your driveway I wasn't sure that I wouldn't turn around. I'll admit, being here, it's not the easiest thing to do, but it's what I've got to get used to if we're going to ," he swallowed, "Be friends." 

Biting her cheek she tried to keep from smiling, leaning across the console, she slowly urged him toward her, waiting until she could nearly taste him to whisper, "Friends huh?" 

Grinning, he pulled her back, "Kiss me." 

OoOoO

Xander's eyes nearly popped from his head when she walked through the door with Angel behind her. Any other time she would have made some joke about it, but she knew Angel was already on edge with this whole situation, and she didn't want to be the one who called any attention to the rift between the two of them. 

Of course it was Xander who chose to approach them first, "Angel," he stated rather surprised. 

Angel nodded, "Harris." 

Buffy threw her arms around him, even though she'd stopped on her way back from L.A she felt like she hadn't seen her friends in weeks. "You know I'm actually just going by Xander these days." 

Angel nodded again, "I'll keep that in mind." 

Smiling nervously between the two of them, Buffy reached for Angel's arm, tugging him away from the stare down he was having with her best friend. "You promised to be nice," she chastised as his arms came to rest around her. 

He smirked, "I was." 

The lights, the people, the pounding from the music, it all seemed to fade away. All she could focus on was the two of them in the middle of the dance floor, she knew she was supposed to say something but for the life of her she couldn't remember what it was. 

"Uh-sorry," she whispered, her fingers scratching at his nape. 

"No," he breathed, shaking his head, slipping his tongue between her parted lips. 

"Buffy!?" Willow gasped running up to them, more than a little curious to see the guy her bestie was making out with. 

Dazed Buffy pulled back, though with the way the room seemed to be spinning, she was glad Angel held onto her. 

She blushed,"Surprise." 

OoOoO

Thankfully everyone quickly got over the fact that they'd caught her and Angel kissing, well they had pretended to at least. But judging from the looks she'd been getting from Willow all night, she could tell she would have some explaining to do the next time she got her alone. Xander, unusual as it was, seemed to completely ignore the fact that Angel was there at all, not that he seemed to mind.

She smiled as he pulled her down on his lap, when everyone disappeared in search of drinks. "Is there something going on between the two of you that I should know about?" 

His brows rose, "With Harris? In his dreams." 

She laughed, "Should I be jealous?" 

He pulled her closer, brushing his lips against her, "I know that he should be." 

"Mine and Xanders friendship is not the same as ours," she giggled, touching her lips to his again. 

There was that word again, friend, for as much as he'd shoved that word down Cordy and Lindsey's throat in regards to Buffy, he was really starting to despise it. Like she said their relationship wasn't the same, and calling her his friend just wasn't sitting right. He didn't want to be lumped into some group with fucking Xander Harris, though any further thoughts as to what their title could be had him breaking out in a cold sweat. 

"You okay," she asked, noticing that he was even paler than usual. 

He nodded, "Ya, I think so." 

OoOoO

She finally managed to break them away from the party once Dingoes Ate My Baby got off the stage. Oz's arrival provided the perfect distraction for her intoxicated red headed friend. Normally she would feel guilty for not closing the place down, but they had almost made it, plus she doubted Will would even remember them leaving after the shots Xander fed her. 

She was no stranger to the way Angel's hands always seemed to find her, but the way that his fingers were biting into the bare flesh of her thigh from the driver's seat nearly had her melting into a puddle. One thing was for certain, he'd managed to quell any doubts she had about whether or not he was really attracted to her. He made no secret about holding her, or kissing her in front of her friends. Not that she thought he would, but they were treading in unchartered waters, so she hadn't been too sure what to expect until he showed up. 

He glanced over at her, "Penny for your thoughts?" 

She smirked, "Are you ever going to tell me what the deal between you and Xander is?" 

He winced, "You were really thinking about him?" 

"No," she blushed. "But I'm not sure my thoughts are very friend appropriate right now," she told him, feeling a fluttering inside of her chest, one she was getting quite familiar with since Angel had become part of her life in this new light, as his eyes glinted and he glanced over at her. 

"Is that so?" he questioned. "Well, that sounds way more interesting to hear about than any more discussion surrounding Harris."

"Oh, they most certainly are," she teased. As the car came to a stop at the light Angel leaned over, pressing his lips to hers for the countless time tonight. As her eyes slowly re-opened, she tried to gauge the emotions she saw staring back at her in his dark pools before the car behind them honked, tired of waiting on them to go as the light had changed during their little make out session. 

Hooking her arm into his, she scooted as close to him as she could. "Did you have a good time?" 

"I always have a good time when I am with you. I will admit it was a little strange, though at times. My mind would drift to some what ifs."

"Like what?" 

He shrugged. "I don't know, just picturing what that night could have been like instead. While we were dancing a few times I wondered if that would have happened that night. Or, would we have hit it off given more time to get to know one another and been friends. Or more."

There was that damn fluttering again. 

"It's also a little strange I guess that in a small town like this everyone obviously knows what happens and I'm sure you are more or less used to everyone knowing and remembering and all that but people recognized me too, I guess from the newspapers and police reports and everything, and that is a little out of my element."

You didn't have to convince her of that, she'd seen his face when a couple of people had dared to come over or one just simply called out having recognized him and put it together that oh, Buffy and Angel were right here together. 

"You might have more of that the more you are here," she warned and he just made a face about it. "I am glad you came," she said softly as they just turned down her road. "I missed you, and the idea of having to wait twice as long until we could hang out again seemed like too much to deal with."

As they pulled into the driveway, Angel undid his seat belt, then hers and told her to stay put. Her eyes were big and confused as he walked around the front of the vehicle, opening her door just to reach for her, he pulled her up against him enough to be able to slide back down into the passenger seat with her straddling over his lap. 

She only grew more confused as he continued to stare at her, looking like he wanted to say something but couldn't figure out the right words. 

His hands came up under the bottom of her dress again, her breath stilling as his fingertips toyed with the small line of her panties at either side. "I have a bit of a problem," he finally said. 

"Oh?" she breathed. 

"Yeah," he nodded. "You ever have a moment that you imagine, picture in your head, and it winds up almost on a loop? You think of basically the same thing but in a million different scenarios?" he asked and she nodded her head. "Well, I keep picturing you and me and I lean closer to you and tilt my head, and kiss, nip, and tease my way up the side of your neck," he told her as he also demonstrated. Buffy's hands grasped harder into his shoulders as her head tilted back to give him better access. "And then, I whisper in your ear that I want you to be with me," he also showed along with his tell. 

Buffy felt a shiver go down her back as those words fell over her. 

Angel pulled back a little, his eyes locking with hers. "And in the same breath, I want to tell you that is absolutely not what you want." 

"I-it's not?" 

His head shook. "You are perfect in every damn way I can think of. You went through hell and you're still some damn ray of sunshine, you make the world feel better, brighter when you're around. You deserve better than any damn thing I could give you and I know that. I don't like it, but I know it."

"That's not true, Angel."

I'm a fucking mess and I don't want you to have to deal with that, I don't want to put some dark cloud over all that good inside of you. All of what I have told you about why I don't date rings true, always, but it's a thousand times worse when I think about you because you already went through more than fucking enough. I have lifelong issues bound to follow me after that night and I don't always handle them well my own self. I can't get my head around having to put that on someone else, too."

"I have plenty of my own mental scars and problems carried on, too, you know."

"I do know, and I don't want to make them worse for you. I also... I don't know how to... do any of this. I don't know how to be with someone and that shouldn't be falling on you to fix either. I would fuck that up somehow or another. You deserve so much more than the guy who went around sleeping with everyone in his path."

"Lots of guys sleep around."

He shrugged. "Maybe. But you don't need that."

"I mean, it may not be ideal... I'm nothing special, I mean... I can count on one hand how many guys I have been with, and it wasn't exactly anything worth writing home about as you might say... I might worry I'm not enough for you, or you want someone else, you might be imagining someone else or-"

"That would absolutely never happen," he cut her off, his head shaking again. "And you absolutely are everything special compared to anyone I have ever fucking met. I haven't been able to think about much else besides you since you flipped my world upside down by coming back into it. I want you... in ways I didn't think I would ever want anyone. And I don't know what I'm supposed to do about that. Because my mind is pretty much all consumed with all these things I want to do or be with you... from wanting to know exactly what every inch of you feels like under my hands, against my body, how every inch of you tastes, figuring out exactly how you want to be touched, every little noise I could draw from those perfect lips of yours.." he told her, his voice husky and low,. "to... anything. To what it would be like to feel like to spend time with you as... as more... for these little adventures of ours to have that extra meaning to them, to what it would feel like to wake up next to you every morning…"

Tilting her own head, she began mimicking his actions, nibbling her way up his neck, effectively silencing him. "You think too much," she whispered, her lips brushing up against him as she spoke. "I want you too Angel, in a way that scares me beyond explanation. Ever since that night, I kinda just assumed that was it for me, especially after the way things fizzled with Riley. Dating, sex, it all just became something that didn't feel important anymore, and I'm sure there's a whole gang of explanations out there on why that is, but the reality was I just couldn't bring myself to trust anyone enough to let them get that close. After that night it was like every guy I met instantly got categorized as my enemy."

Swallowing passed the lump in her throat she continued, "How was I supposed to have sex with someone, when the slightest brush of a man's hand in line at the bank sent me into a full blown panic attack?" She sighed, blinking as the first stream of tears fell from her eyes. "I couldn't…" she whispered, raising her gaze back to his. "But I had to find a way to make myself believe I could be normal again, so eventually, and after a lot of coaxing from my mom and friends, it got a little better. I learned how to push past that rush of fear I felt every time someone touched me, but I still knew my limits, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle anything like this," she arched against him. "But when I found you again, those thoughts, those fears…" she stumbled, "They fade when I'm with you. Instead of being worried about if you were going to touch me, I found myself absolutely terrified that you wouldn't. I know we're a mess, but I don't think it's possible to forget what you taste like, not anymore." 

His eyes gleamed, his breath was heavy, he knew that he should put an end to this now, before either of them fell deeper than they already were, but he just couldn't seem to find the words. "I don't want to hurt you Buffy," he sighed, one of his hands daring to follow the trail of her panties around the curve of her hip. 

Those familiar shivers returning, she shook her head as she watched him lean further back into the seat, "You wont," she nearly gasped, silently wishing he would continue his exploration. 

Catching her off guard his hands bunched in the fabric of her dress as he pulled her back to him. He still didn't know if this was the right decision or not, but with her on top of him like this he wasn't sure there was ever a choice to begin with. Sliding his lips back across hers, his hands once again slipped beneath her dress, his fingertips digging into her flesh. 

She felt like she was in a dream, living out some random fantasy in her head. She didn't dare believe this was really happening, but the sound of her neighbors car horn had her quickly bouncing back to reality. Each of them jumped so hard, she wasn't sure how she hadn't hit her head. 

She really couldn't stand the old couple, but the last thing she needed was them complaining to her landlord. "W-we should probably get inside," she groaned, her face buried against his neck. 


	9. Chapter Nine

After a quick apology and wave to her neighbor, Angel followed her into the house, smirking when he saw her carrying his bag down the hall. 'I guess that's settled' he thought to himself as he stepped inside her bedroom. Wrapping his arms back around her, he walked them both back to the bed, gently collapsing on top of her. "This is the part where I usually fail," he sighed, settling above her. 

Bending her knees, she cradled him between her thighs, "I don't think that's possible," she breathed, her head still spinning from the thought that he was hers. Sliding her hands between them, she pushed on his shirt until he finally got the hint, leaning back a bit so he could take it off. 

Once again he nearly got lost in the feel of her surrounding him, he hadn't known it was possible for two people to fit so perfectly together. "So how does this work," he asked, bracing himself back over her. 

She didn't think she would ever get tired of looking at him from this angle, "Um," she spaced. "What do you mean?" 

He smiled against her, positive she was the most adorable person in the entire world. "I mean," he kissed her again. "I don't know how I'm supposed to hold you in my arms all night without burying myself inside of you." 

She blushed, the images he created burning through her mind. She was supposed to be the level headed one here, she was the one with all the big hang ups, but here she was a part of her wishing he'd make those words a reality. She swallowed, "Easy. We don't take our clothes off." 

He grinned, "Never stopped me before." 

She rolled her eyes, this was already proving harder than she ever imagined. She'd spent basically every night this week fantasizing about this exact moment. She knew they shouldn't rush, they had enough issues to deal with, and she didn't care what anyone said, all sex ever did was complicate matters, still didn't stop her from wanting him though. 

He rolled to the side of her, needing to put at least a little distance between them before he really made an ass of himself. "I need to know what you're comfortable with, I don't want to pressure you into anything." 

She brought her hand up to trace the ridge of his brow, "There's no wrong way to touch me Angel," she grinned, guiding his hand back to the inside of her thigh. "I'll tell you if it's too much," she whispered, letting go of his wrist. 

With an achingly slow pace he inched his hand up the soft curve of her thigh, slipping his thumb beneath the seam of her panties, brushing it across her wet slit. Her chest heaved as the tiniest moan slipped from her lips, he smirked, knowing that he'd just discovered his new favorite sound. 

Gasping, she pulled his mouth back down to her, slipping her tongue between his lips, she wasted no time deepening their kiss. That low tingle she'd been feeling whenever he was around suddenly felt like an explosion igniting within her. Rocking her hips she silently pleaded with him for more. 

Finding her swollen bundle of nerves, he rolled it between his fingers, she was giving him way more credit than he deserved here. He wasn't sure he could make it through watching her fall over that brink of ecstasy, but he was quickly learning that he lacked the ability to deny her anything.

Making quick work of her panties, he swiftly pulled them down her hips, before returning to her aching center, teasing her entrance with his long fingers that were dying to be inside of her. She moaned his name as he slipped one, then two, digits inside of her wet heat, slowly moving in and out of her, imagining what she would feel like with her inner walls clenching around his cock which was twitching and jerking with a need he was pretty sure he'd never known in his entire life. 

Buffy's whole body seemed to shiver as his fingers would press back into her, her hips bowing toward him and her breathing becoming more and more uneven. He tested out different angles, rhythms, and patterns to see how she would react, committing everything to memory as he went along, craving as much knowledge of her as he could grab onto.

Buffy's eyes grew wide - to near comical levels - as he whispered he wanted to taste her. "Y-you w-want what?  _ W-why _ ?" 

Angel raised an eyebrow at, doing all he could not to smirk at her flushed face, those lust filled green orbs trying to make sense of all that was happening here. Looking down, he took in the way her chest rose and fell, how her nipples were pebbling out from the thin material of her dress, how perfect it laid against her thin frame... "Is that okay?" he finally asked. 

"I-I don't know," she breathed out. "I-is it?" she stammered.

Angel couldn't help but chuckle and mutter how fucking cute she was. Those glossy, innocent eyes were going to be his undoing one of these days, he wished he could bottle her up just like this. 

"Oh," fell from her lips as he touched her again, her whole body seeming to tense up and relax at the same time when his tongue began exploring her. Just as he promised her earlier, he craved knowing every single sound he could draw out of her, he loved that she had tried to bite back every moan and remain quiet and the fact that she just couldn't so finally let go. He took quick note of every single shudder, how her thighs would either spread to give him more room or when they would start to clamp shut around him, the lower half of her body trying to lift off the bed. 

OoOoO

"A-Angel?" 

"Hmm?" he hummed against her. 

Her fingernails scratched at his scalp, pulling him closer to her. When she didn't get anything out except "I..." and a number of gasps and moans, he reluctantly pulled away from her a little. 

"Do you want me to stop?" 

Buffy shook her head, unable to put into words what in the hell she was even getting at, just before she found herself being repositioned. Angel rolled, pulling her with him, and with no effort at all seemed to have her floating above his head with her weight cast on her knees. She shivered again as she felt his fingers unzipping the back of her dress and attempting to guide it off her, her hands moved on their own accord to peel it away and discard off to the side of the bed. 

Angel's hands guided her own to her breasts and she squeezed the soft flesh as his thumbs brushed her aching nipples. His hands traveled down her body, one hand coming to rest against her ass as he eased her back to him. "I'm going to suffocate you," she panicked and Angel only laughed heartily. 

"It might have been quite some time since I have done this but I think I'm going to survive," he told her, still chuckling. 

She didn't have time to deconstruct what that was supposed to mean as her mind blanked on everything else around her as his hands squeezed her ass, his tongue slipping inside of her body again. This right here was so far out of her comfort zone she couldn't even see it and she was sure everything they were doing right now was skipping a whole lot of steps but that seemed to be a theme with what was to be their relationship. 

Distracted by movement from behind her, her head turned and she nearly fell over as she watched Angel's hand snake around his very angry looking manhood and begin stroking his hand up and down his length. "Oh, God," she moaned before having to look away, afraid she was going to completely lose it with the scene he was creating.

As Angel's hand left the comfort of her backside, she felt his far too talented fingers slip into her center again, pumping in and out in rhythm to match his other hand, she fell forward and used her arms to try and keep herself from completely collapsing on top of him as his lips wrapped around her clit and began teasing her until she was clawing at the sheets, the pillows, anything she could get her hands on as stars began dancing in front of her eyes. 

"Oh, God," she moaned out, her hips moving uncontrollably against him until she felt the pressure inside of her finally tip over and she couldn't do anything but let it wash over her.

OoOoO

After throwing his discarded t-shirt back on, Buffy curled up against Angel's warm body, her thigh thrown over his lap, her hand toying at the very small space between the top of his boxers and the tail end of his scar. "It's red."

"Hmm?" he asked before looking down and seeming to remember he was exposed here. "It's supposed to fade over time," he told her, his shoulders shrugging a little. 

"Does it hurt?" she questioned.

"No. I mean, at times I might feel a weird pulling sensation or get a stabbing, like a needle prick, feeling, in various spots. Other areas are completely numb. The whole extra line there that curves to the right I can't feel anything over there."

Buffy's fingers lightly continued their way upward and he stared hard at the ceiling. When he heard her sniffle though, his head quickly turned back to her and he pulled her closer. "I would do it all over again, a million times over," he whispered, "so please stop whatever thoughts are swirling in there."

She knew how much he pulled away from any talk of saving her life or being a hero so she bit her tongue on what she wanted to say and just pushed up closer to him, her lips capturing his. 

OoOoO

Yawning, Buffy asked Angel what he wanted to do the following day. "I think you mean later today at this point," he mumbled. 

"True." She winced a little as she mentioned she had agreed to bring him by her mother's and he surprised her by not even flinching at the idea. "We could do something fun afterward? I mean, Sunnydale isn't exactly overflowing with activities or attractions or anything... but I'm sure we could figure something out." 

"If you don't, I'm sure that I could come up with some way or another to spend the day," he teased. 

"You're horrible," she told him, her face burning pink as she imagined just what that could entail. 

"Mmm, well, you're sexy. I can't help it," he mumbled. 

Buffy blushed curling further into his side. "Angel?"

He leaned his head toward her a little, "Hmm?" 

"I'm glad you're here," she mumbled against him, her eyes finally drifting shut. 

He didn't respond, opting instead to brush his lips up against her forehead. Truth was despite, this place, this town and all the horrible memories it held, there was no place he would rather be. Not wanting to dwell on what all that may mean, he held her a little tighter as he too let himself drift off. 

OoOoO

Sometime later he woke to the feeling of someone shifting against him. It took him a few seconds to get his bearings and remember where he was, and who exactly he was pressed so intimately behind. Reality floating back, his arm slipped underneath his shirt that she'd thrown on to hold her closer. 

"Good morning," he murmured, kissing his way down the side of her neck, his hand crawling up her lean stomach to brush against the perfect curve of her beast, his thumb daring to run across her pebbled nipple. 

Coming too, she arched into his touch, "Mmm, I missed waking up next to you," she mumbled, her voice heavy with sleep, turning a bit, she easily slipped beneath him. Her thighs spreading, she let out the smallest gasp as he fully settled above her. 

He wasn't sure he had ever seen a woman more beautiful, much less woken up next to one. "Not nearly as much as I missed you," he groaned, capturing her lips. Growing bolder, she rolled her hips against the hardness she felt pressed so closely against her. She'd been with a handful of guys before, but she'd never felt anything like this. She never really understood everyone's big hang up when it came to sex, it was okay, but she'd never really been one to crave it, or initiate things. Mostly she had just participated because she felt like it was what she was supposed to do, it was more of a chore than anything else, but lying here like this, feeling him up against her, it was awakening parts of her she didn't even know existed. 

Loosening her hold on his neck, she slid her hands between them, trailing her down his smooth chest, her fingertips danced around the top of his boxers. Ever since she caught that glimpse of him last night, she couldn't seem to shake the thought that she wanted to be the one who touched him.

Still poised above her, he watched those big innocent eyes look up at him as she came to a decision, surprising him as she slipped her hand inside his waistband, her tiny fingers gripping him as best she could. "Is this okay," she whispered, her palm lightly grazing against him as she softly stroked his length. 

He pressed his lips to hers again, "You don't have to…" he began. 

She shook her head, "But I want too," she promised him, tightening her grip around him a little more. His eyes darkened as he twitched in her palm, it was hard enough letting her drive away last weekend, he wasn't sure how he was supposed to leave her now. Pushing those thoughts out of his mind, he slowly rolled off her, pushing down his boxers as he went. 

Sitting up, her eyes went wide as she watched his very large, very swollen, extremely angry looking manhood come into view. Working her bottom lip between her teeth, she glanced at him, her eyes wide. "How is that ever supposed to fit?" 

He chuckled, "I'm sure we'll make it work." Had he any doubts before, he was now absolutely positive that she was the most adorable creature he'd ever laid eyes on. Gripping his cock, he laced his fingers with her own, guiding her hand up and down his length a few times. "I think-I think it's getting bigger," she whispered, though he wasn't sure if she was talking more to herself or him. 

OoOoO

He had never been teased before, not like this. He felt like he'd been shoved back in time, back to his younger teenage self, back when he had to actually worry about losing control and embarrassing himself. He couldn't even remember the last time someone had worked him with their hands like this, not to this point at least. Wanting to let her explore, he'd tried to keep himself calm, to let her have this, but somewhere along the line her soft caresses had turned bolder, and now he was having a very hard time not thrusting his hips to meet her smooth strokes. 

She'd never felt like this before, she didn't even know how to describe it, knowing that she was capable of turning him into this, made her feel more powerful than she ever had before. Seeing him like this was also doing all kinds of crazy things to her insides, but she was trying her best to push those thoughts away. Alternating her pace, she would go from gripping him firm to lightly running her fingers up and down the rigid flesh. She watched in amazement as small beads of moisture began to fall from his tip, clenching her thighs together she'd barely ignored the urge to lean over and taste him for herself. 

"Come here," he commanded, his voice husky and full of need. Grabbing her waist, he mimicked his movements from the previous night, except this time she found herself lying across him upside down, her thighs once again spread across his face. 

Having no time for any more barriers between them, he quickly tore one of the straps to her silky thong, and pushed it out of the way. Gripping her ass, he guided her dripping entrance back over his mouth just as she brought her second hand around to aid in gripping him. 

Once again she was miles away from her comfort zone, but she couldn't seem to bring herself to care at the moment. She was quickly learning that there was absolutely no better feeling than the way she felt when he put his mouth on her. Maybe it was because of the heights he'd taken her to, or maybe it was because it was right there in her face, but without much thought she found herself swirling her tongue over his purple head. 

His hips nearly rose off the bed, and his eyes crossed as he pulled back from her wet heat to catch the breath that had just been forcefully expelled. He couldn't get over how fucking perfect she was, how despite her lack of experience she seemed to know just how to touch him, almost as if she could read his mind. 

Without warning there was a pounding on her front door so loud it caused both of them to jump. "Ignore it," she moaned, nearly out of her mind with need for this man. She figured it was probably just Xander anyway, stopping by to put his nose where it didn't belong since he knew Angel was staying here. 

"BUFFY," she heard her mother's voice yell, just as she made out the sound of someone coming into the house. Panicked she looked up to see her bedroom door wide open and nearly pulled a muscle or two as she moved faster than she figured she had in years. Her mouth opened nearly as wide as her eyes trying to think of something to say to Angel but nothing came. She could have swore she heard him chuckling as she threw on a pair of shorts in lightening speed and rushed out the bedroom door. 

"Mother," Buffy greeted, finding Joyce not far from her room. "What are you doing here?" she breathed out. Her heart still felt as though it was hammers inside of her chest, she could still taste Angel on her tongue and her body still tingled as if she were still laid out on top of him. 

Joyce's eyes narrowed and she reached out to place the back of her hand to Buffy's forehead. "You look flushed, are you feeling alright?"

"I'm fine," she hurried out. "I just woke up a bit ago and... I was surprised by you showing up," Buffy covered. "I thought I was supposed to come see you later this morning though?"

Joyce waved a hand in the air. "What can I say? I was a little worried and a little curious about Angel being in town. Besides, I saw the special at a certain diner in town for breakfast this morning was your favorite so I went ahead and got some to-go boxes for everyone. And... speaking of everyone... where is your guest anyway?"

Buffy tried hard not to blush. "Um, he wanted to get changed and ready for the day so, um, he's borrowing my room for a moment."

"Okay, well, how was Willow's party last night?" Joyce questioned, turning back around to walk toward Buffy's small kitchen-slash-dining room. 

OoOoO

Buffy felt her heart rate pick up speed again when Angel emerged, a playful smirk on his face for just a moment shared between the two of them before Joyce caught sight of him out of the corner of her eye. Angel's face broke out into a welcoming smile, taking a step forward. and extending a hand. "Mrs. Summers," he greeted, "It's a pleasure to meet you."

Joyce seemed to hesitate for a moment before accepting his hand then quickly lifting out of her seat to pull him into a hug. Buffy felt her heart squeeze a little as she knew how emotional it was for her to see him. 

"You saved my baby girl," Joyce told him, holding him to her. Angel looked uncomfortable as she knew he would when her mother got the chance to fall apart at him. 

"I... I just tried to help in a situation, th-that's all," he muttered back to her. 

Joyce shook her head, pulling away from him and her hands held onto his arms. "You saved my daughter, you did something not many would actually have the guts to do faced with that kind of decision. There is no way to ever express my gratitude to you for that, it's a debt that can never be paid."

Angel nearly winced. "I just reacted," he tried again. 

OoOoO

Joyce swallowed hard. She didn't want to make a scene but it felt like there was so much she wanted to say to this young man and she had practiced it for years but as he stood here she just seemed to go mostly blank. She had seen Angel before but that was a lifetime ago, when he was still in a coma, all bandages and tubes. 

The first thing Buffy had screamed and cried about when she'd been able was to had been asking "Is he dead?" 

No one had understood at first, "N-no, Buffy. The police took him into custody-"

Her head had shook violent. "No, not him," Buffy had cried and something in the air had shifted as it dawned on them that Buffy was worried the stranger who saved her life had been killed through all of this. Joyce had rushed to tell her she didn't have much information but knew he was alive, at least he was the last she had heard. She couldn't imagine the grief that must have flooded her daughter as she worried she'd caused someone harm, possibly their life. 

She had met his parents, had been granted a few short moments to look him over, whispering and crying over him, she had been informed of any changes while the two of them had remained in the hospital. She, along with Buffy, had often wanted to figure out a way to reach out to him after everything but nothing ever felt right. 

She couldn't believe it when Buffy had told her she had "ran in" to him all this time later, then there was having gone to see him last weekend and now here he was again...

OoOoO

Buffy found once her mother stopped harping on the hero aspect of him, he seemed to relax and they fell into easy conversation over breakfast. Angel asked her about work, some of the artists she was featuring at the gallery, her life here in Sunnydale while Joyce dived into a wide array of topics that he went right along with each time. 

Then, "Buffy mentioned you didn't have a girlfriend back home," came out of her mouth and Angel nearly choked there for a moment. 

"Um, well, I-I didn't," he said slowly, his eyes meeting hers, practically screaming for help as he stumbled more. "I mean there's no one back in LA..."

Buffy blushed a little. "Um, yeah... actually Angel and I are kind of... together now."

Her heart melted as she watched how such a simple collection of words seemed to make him light up, but she smiled a little nervously as her eyes glanced over to her mother next. 

"You two are... dating?" Joyce questioned, clearly surprised by that revelation. 

"Yes..." She looked like she was going to start crying again as she was back on her feet and leaning over to hug Angel. "That is the best news I could have imagined."

OoOoO

Buffy's face turned bright red, her hands coming up to cup over her nose and mouth as she found herself alone with Angel again, her mother's visit slipping away and memories of this morning flooding back to her. She was pretty sure she was mere moments away from having to pack and move away, change her name and never show her face ever again had her mother would have actually caught them in the predicament they'd tangled themselves into this morning. 

As if reading her mind, Angel got one of those teasing smirks back on his lips, closing in on her. 

"I'm sorry," she laughed out. "I didn't know she was going to show up like that and I kind of panicked."

"You're fine," he promised, easing her hands out of the way so he could drop a quick kiss to her mouth. But when he went to pull away, Buffy's arms reached for him, drawing him closer, deepening the kiss. "I suggest you go get changed and figure out what you want to do today before I decide to take you back to that bed and we finish what we started," he threatened. 

Her mouth opened like she wanted to say something before it closed and she opened it once more, "And what if I said I wasn't opposed to that idea," she asked her fingers scratching at his hair. 

Angel backed her further against the wall, "Oh ya?" 

There she went, working her lip back between her teeth again, her emerald eyes seeming as though they were trying to peer into his soul. "Mmhmm. Like I said Sunnydale is kind of lacking in the fun department," her fingers walked down his chest until they were bunched in the bottom of his shirt. "And I'm kind of feeling this overwhelming urge to keep you all to myself...especially since you have to leave tomorrow," she added sadly. 

"I know the feeling," he breathed, brushing his lips up against hers. "Speaking of," he broke away, "My parents, they- I mean  _ we _ go camping every year, and with next week being a holiday they kind of planned this whole weekend for all of us…" 

She blushed a little again, "Hey it's no big," she promised, though she now understood how he felt when she'd told him she wouldn't be able to make it back to LA last time. Two weeks kind of felt like a lifetime right now when it came to him. 

"Come with me?" 

Her eyes went wide as she paused breaking out into a grin, "You really want me to meet your family?"

He chuckled, pulling her with him back to the couch, tugging her down to straddle his waist. "Well you've already met half of them, all that's really left is mom and dad," he told her, tucking a couple stray hairs behind her ear. 

Her smile grew a bit. "What," he groaned. 

"Look at you," she teased. "Mister anit-relationship himself wanting to meet all the parents…" she grazed her lips against his cheek. "I'm impressed."

He shook his head, letting it drop back against the sofa, "It's all you beautiful," he sighed, "I didn't get a choice." 

There went that weird flutter inside of her again, she'd never understood why he'd chosen someone like her when there was probably dozens of girls wishing they were in her shoes. "I'd love that," she whispered, nipping her way up his throat. 

"Mmm," he groaned, "Well you might change your mind after we get there, Cordy's not the easiest person to deal with when you're sleeping in tents." 

"Tents," she mumbled, raising her head to peek at him. 

He nodded, a bit distracted by what she was doing with her hands. "Mom refuses to buy a camper, it's not too bad this time of year though, he grinned, "Plus you'll get to share a tent with me." He still hadn't told his parents that she'd found him, or that they'd basically spent every possible moment together since. He would definitely need to fill them in some before Friday, that was if Cordy hadn't already taken it upon herself. 

"Well that doesn't sound like the worst thing in the world," she teased. 

He shifted them, pulling her down so she was lying beside him on the couch, her legs still tangled around him. "You really want to hang out here with me today," he asked, his fingers slipping beneath the hem of her shirt. 

She nodded, there was little else she'd of all week if she were being honest. She was quickly learning that weekends were nowhere near long enough. Those five days without him were torture. "I missed you," she nearly moaned as his thumb brushed across her sensitive nipple.

He wasn't sure what he ever did to deserve her, or why the fates had forced them to meet under the circumstances that they had, but lying here, wrapped up in her arms like this, it sure made him question that old saying about everything happening for a reason. Thoughts swirling in his mind, he couldn't help but think that she was put on this Earth just for him. "You're perfect," he murmured, half to himself as he captured her lips another time. 

It was weird nothing had changed since this morning, but for some reason, seeing him with her mom, seeing the way his face lit up when she'd told her that they were together made everything between them seem more real. Like, what was going between them was more than just some last filled whispers in the dark. They were really doing this, they were officially a couple, and as much as that thought exhilarated her, on some level it terrified her just the same. She'd never felt this way about anyone before, and it was more than just being some slave to passion - not that she was complaining about those parts - but what she felt when she was with him she didn't even know how to begin to describe… he felt like home.


	10. Chapter Ten

Just as things had really begun to heat up between them on the couch his phone had rang, at first they'd ignored it, but when it went off for the third time he muttered something about people and family members and their damn timing, before reluctantly crawling off her to go find the damn device. 

"What," he groaned into the receiver, lifting her legs to lay across him as he took a seat back on the couch. 

Buffy listened as him and Cordy went back and forth, apparently he'd forgotten to call her after he finally made it here last night and she was not happy about it. Especially not after the way he'd called her in a panic and then hung up on her mid sentence when her voice just became too much. 

"For the last time Cordy, I'm sorry." Angel winced holding the phone away from his ear a bit as her voice rose again. He'd barely even been able to get a word in between her yelling at him, and what sounded like Lindsey yelling at her, telling her she was overreacting, and that he was probably just distracted by that fine ass  _ friend _ of his. 

Hearing her name, Buffy blushed as she crawled back into his lap. She hadn't even thought to have him check in with his sister once he got here last night, which sure to most people that might sound a little weird, but with everything they had been through - in this town no less - she understood where she was coming from. 

She took the phone from his hand and hit the little button to turn it into a video call. Angel's brows rose, but he let her take it, he smirked though not sure she knew what she was asking for. Especially since they were basically still in the clothes they'd slept in last night, his grey shirt still pooling around her tiny waist. 

Buffy waited for Cordy to accept the video call, and then waited again until the video came into focus. Cordy's eyes went wide at their rumpled appearance, but Lindsey just started laughing, snatching the phone from his girlfriend's hand. 

"Well hello there gorgeous," he drawled, lifting the phone from Cordy's reach. "You takin' good care of our boy out there," he smirked noticing Angel's familiar shirt hanging off the thin frame of the blonde, how Angel's head tilted to whisper in her ear and the way she blushed, waved him off before trying to focus more on the phone in her hand. "Hi, Lindsey," she greeted. "And yes, Angel has been being looked after just fine. We had some touch and go moments last night getting him into town but everything was fine after that... we just kind of got caught up in everything going on."

"Well, I figured. I tried telling Cordelia here that was all it was but she wasn't having any of it. You know how she gets," he half whispered, earning another annoyed look from his girlfriend.

"I'm sorry," Angel said again, despite his earlier declaration. 

"I'm sorry, too," Buffy chimed in. "I really wasn't even thinking about anything like that once Angel got here, I was just excited to see him and we were already a little late to my best friends' party... then we just kind of got caught up."

"Uh huh," Lindsey smirked once more. 

"I swear I intended to call you back, hell I even had the thought run through my mind as we were leaving that club to come back to Buffy's and I got distracted," he told her and then Buffy tried not to laugh as he tried to figure out the best way to tell them how things had obviously progressed into something more overnight between them. Both Cordelia's and Lindsey's eyes widened once he strangled the words out about them deciding to be a couple now, his eyes glancing her way to make sure she was okay with telling him and that he wasn't fucking things up somehow or another. 

"You..." Cordelia spoke for the first time since the call switched over to video. "You two are actually, like, together... together? Like, you're going to date and all those things?"

"Yes," Angel answered slowly. 

She seemed to be rendered speechless again but Lindsey laughed so hard he almost started choking. "Well, it's about damn time!"

OoOoO

After over an hour passed on their phone call, finally Buffy tossed his phone over to the far side of the couch and snuggled up closer to him. She was pretty sure her face was going to hurt the rest of the day from blushing under Lindsey's comments and she was fairly certain Cordelia was going to pull her aside next weekend at some point and have plenty of things to say that she didn't want to over the phone, that Angel would have an earful waiting for him once he got back into town. 

"Are you sure you really want me coming along next weekend?" she questioned, feeling a little uneasy about the idea now. 

"Don't let Cordelia get to you," Angel whispered, his arms closing tighter around her. "She has repeatedly told me how much she likes you and has teased endlessly about you and me. She might be worried, that's really all it is. Well, that and she's protective... and crazy."

"I don't want to ruin your trip or something, though."

His head shook against her. "I want you there. Don't worry about Cor, she's going to get over whatever hang ups she has," he promised.

"And your parents? They really going to want a stranger tagging along on their family vacation?"

"They've already met Lindsey, they tolerate him," he teased. "It'll be alright."

"Angel."

"They will love you being there and they will absolutely love you," he told her. He went on to warn her that she might be the one wanting to get away from them with all their outpouring of that love and happiness rather than anything else, then trying to ease her mind a bit more he leaned both of them over so he could grab his phone and looked up the campground they'd be going to as well as some old photos from previous trips. 

Camping had never been way up on her normal activities but had it been anyone else suggesting she go sleep outside in the woods in the dark she probably would have laughed in their face with a hard no. 

"They have a little grocery shop in the main building, firewood and shit like that too is sold there," he told her. "There's a few large building with showers and bathrooms, a pool, some playground areas scattered at the different sites for cabins and campers or the tent sites, a basketball court... so there's stuff to do out there, and we usually find some attraction or another to go to at least one day when we're out there, go out to eat when we don't feel like grilling something," he told her after she asked more about the actual plans for when they got there. 

"I don't really have much in the way of wilderness supplies," she warned. "And I don't know what exactly I might even need to have, or to go get."

"It's not the wilderness," he laughed, "I got you covered," Angel promised. "You just pack whatever clothes you want, chargers for your phone and whatever you would normally bring overnight. I'll take care of the rest of it."

"Okay," she agreed slowly. 

"Mmm, I'm much more worried about how I'm supposed to leave tomorrow then spend the entire week away from you."

That made her smile a little. "Friday's do seem impossibly far away each Sunday," she admitted. "I only have to put in a couple of hours though Friday morning so I will actually be able to, hopefully, leave Sunnydale earlier than I normally would. That coupled with the long weekend means more time with you and I have no complaints about that."

"If it is too much you decide that's okay, though. I'll figure out proper dating stuff. I hope. Eventually."

"Proper dating?"

"Yeah... I mean taking you out to places on proper dates and whatever."

Buffy laughed, kissing his cheek. "You've taken me places. Remember the zoo, the pool, we went to many different places to eat the past couple of weekends..."

"But those weren't dates..."

"They weren't?" Buffy raised her eyebrows. In hindsight they certainly had that feeling like they were dating without realizing it... or, more maybe along the lines of pretending not to. "Besides, I like the 'just come hang out with me times', too. The 'I'm going to invite you to a birthday party that'll incite panic inside both of us'. Going out to different, new places with you is absolutely a best time, but so is simply being with you... doing that movie night in a living room, camping sounds like it'll be on that list come next weekend, hell just laying beside you in a bed just talking about... literally anything like we've known one another our whole lives, or, you know, up and deciding to stay home and make out on the couch instead of trying to find something to go and do with the day..." she trailed off with a smirk.

"Oh, so we're supposed to making out, are we?" 

"Absolutely," she breathed out. "At least it's a good starting place."

He chuckled, "You're making it very hard to behave here."

Leaning closer she pressed her lips against his, she had been so close to tumbling over that edge this morning she hadn't even known it was possible to come back. Ever since her mom's interruption all her mind seemed to think about was the taste of him on her tongue, and no matter how hard she tried she couldn't get the image to go away. It definitely made for some awkward moments this morning when one of them would catch her zoning out, and it hadn't helped matters any, when Angel gave her one of those all knowing smirks and pulled her into his arms over by the kitchen. 

She broke away, her chest once again heaving as she tried to refill her lungs. "Wanna go back to bed," she panted with the cutest fucking grin he'd ever seen spread across her face. 

Instead of answering her, he tightened his grip around her ass as he lifted them both up from the couch. They barely reached the hallway before he was backing her against the wall, slamming his mouth back to hers. He now knew that he'd never experienced anything close to what he felt when he was with her. 

It was as if her body never stopped calling out to him, now that he'd got a small taste, the need within him was becoming more and more impossible to ignore. Unlike every other female that he'd come across in his years on this earth, he didn't want to fuck her. No, he wanted so much more. He wanted to hear the way she gasped when he filled her, he wanted to feel the way her body tensed just before she rolled over that cliff, he wanted to know what it was like to be inside someone that you really couldn't imagine living without. 

Stumbling to the bedroom, he pulled his shirt from her head tossing it behind him as he fell over top of her on the bed. Given the opportunity he sunk lower, his lips leaving a trail all the way to the sensitive peaks that had been taunting him all morning. 

Her fingers bunched in the back of his shirt as she tried to pull it off, there were still so many layers between them, but the last thing she wanted to do was pull him off her, not for even a second. Deciding for her, he quickly lifted up and helped her shuck the shirt off him before continuing on his journey to her other breast. 

There wasn't a single thing about her that he didn't want to know, every line, every freckle, he planned to commit every single inch of her to memory. Slipping her pajamas down, he raked a hand back up her thigh, spreading her legs a bit as he slid his thumb beneath the seam of her dampened panties to slide between her warm folds. 

"Let me know if it gets to be too much," he whispered, coming back against her lips. 

She was starting to think that wasn't possible when it came to him but she nodded her head, in no way wanting to halt what they were doing to have that conversation. She held her breath as he ventured lower again, this time working her panties off before returning to her center. She tensed again for just a split second before his mouth was on her but as soon as his lips circled her clit all she could think about was how she wanted more. More of what he was doing, more of what they were doing, more of him. She could barely even remember how she got through her life without him in it and it had only been a number of weeks, she'd never felt like this about anyone before. 

She felt her knees tremble as he inserted one of his skilled digits inside her. She tried so hard to stay quiet but soon she found herself panting, tiny moans escaping her as her hips rolled to meet his lazy thrust. 

Using his tongue to tease her, he waited until she was scratching and clawing at him to flip them over into the same position from the night before. All but collapsed on top of him, she fought to keep from totally smothering him as a tidal wave of pure pleasure washed through her. 

Sliding his fingers from her warm depths, he quickly went to work forcing his own sweats off while his other arm continued to hold her squirming form to him. She struggled to sit back up, her legs were shaking in a way she'd never felt before, and he still hadn't given up. 

Glancing behind her she pouted at the sight of him once again working his swollen manhood. "I wanted to do that," she tried to whine but it came out much more of a breathy whisper than she'd intended. 

She was fucking perfection, he thought as he pulled back from her a little to help get her spun around. She was so sensitive and trembling so badly he couldn't help but chuckle as she tried to get settled. "Sorry," she gasped just as her fingers found him. "I think you might of broken me." 

He'd been about to tell her that he was just getting warmed up but his voice squeezed in his throat as he felt her soft lips caressing him. Hell, at this point he wasn't sure whether or not he himself was broken. He laid there for a moment as she seemed to get accustomed to him, but when she tried to take him into the back of her throat he grabbed her ass and pulled her wetness back down to his skilled mouth. 

Lifting her head for a second she gasped as she tried to remain in control of herself, but her body was in complete overdrive and he didn't seem to care as he slid two fingers back inside of her while he threaded his other hand with hers to work his throbbing cock. 

It was too much, but more than anything she wanted him to reach the same heights as her. Her hips once again moving all on their own, she carefully took him back inside her mouth as she worked to move in rhythm with their hands. 

He wasn't sure he'd ever experienced something so erotic, and he'd been in some pretty precarious situations in his time, though he was now absolutely certain there wasn't a woman out there who could ever compare to this goddess he held in his arms. His chest squeezed as he thought about how she didn't even have a clue as to how truly perfect she was. 

Yet again she was amazed at the indescribable feelings within her. She was so wrapped up in that buzz inside of her that she was having trouble forming a complete thought, nothing even seemed to exist outside of them and this room. 

Feeling his own orgasm building, and knowing there was absolutely nothing he could do to stop it after the abuse he'd put himself through, he pulled back some to try and warn her but that only made her shove his hand away as she took over full control of the situation. Grounding out her name in one last attempt, Buffy still paid no mind to him warning her to pull away from him if she so chose, and he gave up trying. His now freed hand came to rest of the curve of her hip, not that it did much good, she was moving every which way as he teased her, flipping side to side, circling about, unsure if she wanted to push more into his touch or if she had absolutely handled all that she could for now. 

Buffy's thighs practically locked around him as her body started to stiffen, her mouth being otherwise occupied started to make a humming vibration around him that had his eyes rolling back in his head, and it took all the willpower he had inside of him not to thrust his hips up against her mouth as he finally found his own bout of release. 

Buffy's eyes squeezed shut as her body trembled uncontrollably again and she felt like she could taste the rainbow of stars dancing in front of her pupils. Quickly remembering anything she'd ever overheard about sexual gossip she did everything possible to try and not embarrass herself when she felt Angel fall into bliss just a few seconds behind her. 

"Fuck," Angel groaned out a few moments later. 

Buffy half panted, half chuckled, though the simple body movements that caused made her want to squirm. Anything touching her felt like way too much, like she couldn't handle anything more, but she also had legs made of jelly that couldn't even begin to lift her away from any point of contact if she tried. 

OoOoO

Tucked back against him, not even bothering with putting on a stitch of clothing, Buffy's hand slid across Angel's midsection as she continued to find her regular breathing pattern. 

"Where in the fuck have you been my whole life?" Angel breathed, slowly closing his eyes as his head turned to kiss the middle of her forehead.

The corners of Buffy's lips turned upward as she hugged him closer. She was about to make some smart ass quip back to him but the words seemed like too much work to make fall from her mouth, instead in just a matter of moments she closed her eyes and while breathing him in she drifted off. 

OoOoO

Waking up just a little over an hour later, Buffy frowned as she found herself alone in the small bed. She was entirely certain that it had never looked emptier than it did without Angel's large frame beside her. Pulling herself out of the cozy pile of blankets, she picked up Angel's latest discarded shirt and a quick pair of panties before running to the bathroom. When finished, she padded toward whatever sounds she could make out, her whole body seeming to warm at the first glance of him. 

"Well, hello there, Beautiful," Angel greeted, a large smile spreading across his face, his eyes looking her head to toe. 

"I was lonely," she pouted, stepping closer and easily falling into his arms, pressing her body to his warmth. 

"I'm sorry," he teased, bending his head to pop a small kiss on the tip of her nose. "I didn't exactly trust myself laying there naked in bed with you... you also being in one hell of a lovely state of undress I might add. So I got my peeps in," he joked, "then I decided to come make us something to eat. Of course then I felt awkward going through your kitchen... so I wound up ordering a pizza... which should be here in five minutes or so."

Buffy chuckled, her arms wrapping around him. "I am pretty sure I told you to make yourself at home," she reminded. 

Angel shrugged. "Yeah, well... "

Still amused by him, Buffy just shook her head. "I am perfectly fine with pizza," she promised. "Do you want to wanna do a whole picnic at home type thing? I could set something up real quick, maybe we could watch a movie and just be lazy?"

"I am one hundred percent on board with that," he told her, just as there was a knock at the door. Kissing her quickly, he stepped around her to head toward the door, Buffy admired the view of him walking away before he caught her. Blushing she hurried to go grab an extra sheet from her closet and some extra fluffy pillows to throw down on the floor with them. 

Soon they were wrapped up together, backs to the couch as Buffy found them something to get at least mildly interested in. Somewhere along the way, as per usual, their conversation took over, flowing easily from one topic to the other, laughing, and getting more insights into the others' lives. 

For someone who was not exactly used to being in a relationship or even dating, Buffy felt like her world would spin with the fact of Angel's seeming to know exactly how to touch her, even if it was brush against the back of her hand or pushing a fly away piece of hair out of her face, he knew just the right things to say to make her stomach start doing gymnastics. Here he was excited that he'd seen her mother today, other than the details about how close they were to being found in a non parental friendly situation and he seemed completely relaxed about the whole idea of her not only meeting his parents but spending a whole weekend with them, while camping, on a holiday no less. Hell, he'd even brought up discussing what she usually did and went for the next six months worth of holidays and she could see his mind trying to work out how they could make the most of each of those little extra breaks away from work and to be together. 

A tiny little voice inside of her wanted to tell her not to get too caught up in what was happening here with Angel, afraid of what the future might not turn out like... and maybe a little nervous about all that actually could be... but she quickly squashed it back away. She couldn't imagine life without him at this point and that was a lot to take in, but so was any line of thought of them continuing on through this like they were, like everything was just falling right into place. 

This was, without any doubt, the last thing she had ever expected when she reached out to him just a couple of weeks ago but she couldn't imagine her life any different now that she had gotten to know him. He was unlike anyone she'd ever known, he made her feel unlike anyone else, it was like he was part of her soul she'd walked around missing all this time.

OoOoO

As the night wore on, Buffy couldn't seem to shake the reminder going off inside of her that come tomorrow she was going to have to deal with sleeping alone all over again, and wouldn't get to see him for another several days. Looking forward to their trip was easy, getting through until it was time seemed impossible. 

"Hey pretty girl, why the frown," Angel asked, coming up beside her in the bed, water droplets still falling from his hair. He seemed intent to make memories of them in every single room and she had no objections. 

She turned, coming up underneath him some, after the shower they'd basically foregone clothes. She'd snatched up his newly discarded shirt and much to her enjoyment he'd stuck with just his boxers, normally she'd never be so comfortable with someone but with him it just felt natural. "I was just thinking about tomorrow," she sighed, "And how hard it's going to be when you leave."

He smiled softly, she was so fucking beautiful even lying there fresh out the shower, sometimes he found himself having to remember how to breathe when she was around. "I know what you mean," he whispered, pulling her fully beneath him.

"You know I hear there's this flu going around," he teased, settling above her. "You could always play hookie and come home with me for the week." 

She smirked, "Mmm, don't tempt me." 

Honestly the exact same thoughts had been plaguing his mind, for someone who refused to sleep beside another person for years, he sure was dreading his big empty bed come tomorrow. He was sure that first time he rolled over and she wasn't there would send him into a panic, and that knowledge of how many miles apart they truly were didn't help matters either. Nothing else in his life seemed to matter, not like she did. 

She whispered his name, pulling him back from his thoughts, "I don't know that I've ever felt this way."

There wasn't a statement out there that he understood more, "Come here," he told her, flipping them around so that she was pillowed up against him. No, he wasn't the best at the whole dating thing, but he was no stranger to women, and logically knew that things between them were progressing at a rapid pace, but for the life of him he couldn't remember why that was such a bad thing. "It's getting pretty hard to imagine a future without you," he confessed, resting his lips against her forehead. 

A heavy silence hung around them as they laid there just enjoying the feel of one another. Despite all the crazy positions he'd had her in all over the last twenty-four hours, she couldn't help but think that she'd never before experienced a moment so intimate. She was exhausted, but the last thing she wanted to do was fall asleep. Doing that meant welcoming tomorrow and that was not something she was ready to do, not for the first time since he came into her life she found herself wishing that there was a way to freeze time, to lock them in a bubble just like this, wrapped in each other's arms with no worries about what the future may hold. 

OoOoO 

Long after she'd succumb to sleep Angel continued to lie there watching her. After he finally recovered from the incident he built a wall so high around himself that he was sure it was impenetrable. He purposely kept the circle of those close to him small, now knowing first hand the dangers of the world. The less people he cared about, the less they could be hurt, the less they could hurt him. Outside of his family and Lindsey's dumbass there hadn't been anyone out in the world that could be used to hurt him, but now, somehow without him even realizing it she'd come in and blown every single thing in his life to bits,  _ again _ . 

He wasn't sure if there was anything he wouldn't do for her, he wanted to give her everything, he wanted to experience everything with her. He wanted to drag her back to Los Angeles with him tomorrow and beg her not to leave. She was right about one thing, for as tough as it was for him to come to Sunnydale, leaving tomorrow was going to be ten times harder. 

He hated being that far away from her, though he wasn't sure that if she herself lived in L.A. he would feel any different. It seemed any amount of distance between them was quickly becoming too much. He had half the mind to just say fuck it and make the commute back and forth to work everyday but he was trying not to come off as a total stalker. He kept telling himself that he only had to make it through four nights without her, but with her pressed up against him the way she was the thought of sleeping without her for even one night seemed like an eternity. 

He couldn't wait for her to meet his parents though, well really meet them. He was pretty sure their paths had crossed back when he was still in the hospital, but he wanted her to meet them as his girl, not as the one he took a bullet for. Of course next weekend was going to come with it's own set of challenges, mainly having to do with privacy and his inability to keep his damn hands off the woman but he was fairly certain they could make it work. The campground was fairly large, he'd already been trying to work out this place to pitch their tent in his mind, one thing was for sure, he needed to make sure they were as far from his parents as possible, especially with first impressions and all. 

Not that it would matter, he already knew that they were going to fall in love with her. Both his parents, but his mom especially had been harping on him about settling down for nearly as long as he could remember, and whenever Cordy brought Lindsey home, those opinions only got stronger. Lately it seemed like everytime his mother got him on the phone she would spin things around to talks of weddings and grandbabies. He may not be anywhere near ready for all that, but those ideas didn't necessarily send him into a panic the way they once had either, and honestly he wasn't quite sure what to make of that. 


	11. Chapter Eleven

She could feel consciousness trying to seep in and claim her, she fought back, snuggling deeper into the strong arms wrapped around her. She didn't want to wake up, she didn't want it to be Sunday, she didn't want to face the reality that they only had a few measly hours left together. 

More than anything she wanted to take him up on his offer last night, she wanted to call her boss, cash in her pto, and run off with him for the week, but she knew there was no way she could. Not right now during their busiest season, her boss legally may not be able to stop her from using her vacation days, but he sure could make her life a living hell once she went back to work. She'd seen the way he treated some of the other girls who tried to pull the same thing, and she wanted no part of it, she'd worked hard to get in Snyder's good graces and that's where she planned to stay.

"Good morning," she heard Angel rumble from behind her, his arm holding her tighter and she moaned out a little when she felt his cock twitch against her ass when he pressed against her. She was pretty sure nothing beat waking up next to this man. He made her feel wanted in ways she would have never dreamed before.

"Not morning," she mumbled back to him. 

"No? Mmm, well I must have been mistaken.... confused by the sunshine and everything."

"Still sleeping time," she muttered halfway into her pillow. "Morning just means you're closer to leaving and I'm not ready to deal with that. I want to just keep you here like this."

Angel chuckled, kissing her shoulder. "So, you're going to lay here, close your eyes, and pretend the day isn't happening?" he teased. 

Buffy nodded, a smile tugging at her lips. 

"Mmm, well I'm sorry, Sweetheart, but that just isn't going to fly today," he announced, his voice getting a little more energy behind it with every word, before rolling away a bit and gently smacking at her ass. "Come on, get that sexy ass of yours up."

She pouted, turning over to watch him pull himself out of the bed and up to his feet. "We could just stay in bed..." she told him as her body stretched and arched against the mattress. 

"That's not quite the get your ass up meaning I was going for there, woman."

OoOoO

After mock arguing with one another about how he needed to do something a little more boyfriend-y and something that would fall beyond trying to get into her pants, Buffy finally agreed to get up, get dressed, and let him take her out for breakfast at her favorite diner in town. 

Sunnydale was a small, everyone knows everyone else's business kind of town, so she wasn't too surprised by the amount of attention she and Angel seemed to get as soon as they walked in together or how much it increased the longer they sat there together, just laughing and being silly together at the table, doing their best to ignore the looks and whispers coming from every which way. Only one of the onlookers dared confronting them head on, asking Buffy if she were alright and who her friend was. Her insides had wanted to burst as she got to tell yet another person, or rather an entire dining room of people since everyone was eavesdropping, that Angel was her boyfriend. Something about that simple fact just made her want to blush and feel absolutely giddy inside. 

What she had with Angel was exactly what she had given up on so very long ago, she'd done her best to come to terms she'd never have some great love, hell not even an average relationship ever again. The fact that it was him of all people on this damn planet just made it more unbelievable. 

It felt like this was what was always meant to be. Somehow. 

After their meal, Angel sat with her in the car trying to decide what else they could do in the small, nowhere town. Buffy thought for a moment before rambling off everything she could think of that even existed in town for them to do or go to. Soon they were closer to the outskirts of town at a small arcade that was barely surviving at this point, pretty much enjoying the whole building to themselves until the last ten minutes or so, before a couple of teenagers came rolling in. Buffy was pretty sure she hadn't been inside of here since she was a teenager herself so it was a little crazy but she had to admit she had a lot of fun. She also didn't mind the fact that Angel had cashed out his tickets won for a giant stuffed animal for her, which about took up the whole backseat.

Angel took her shopping in the two little shops next to the arcade, making sure she picked out at least one thing from each, before they decided that was simply enough socializing and headed back to her place. Buffy couldn't seem to shake the feeling of dread as they pulled in, even though they still had a couple of hours before he was due to leave... it was just looming there and making her nervous. 

OoOoO

As soon as Buffy stepped in behind him, Angel spun, dropping the bags and large stuffed unicorn out of both of his hands and replacing them with Buffy's body. His arms shot out, pinning her between him and the door, his hands easily finding a resting spot on top of her hips. 

As soon as he leaned down to kiss her though, Buffy's arms wrapped around his neck and she used him as leverage to hop upward against him, his hands moving quickly to catch her as her legs circled around his waist. "I don't like the idea of having to miss you this week," she pouted. 

"I'm not exactly jumping for joy over it either, Pretty Girl," he told her, easily carrying her tiny body through the small duplex until they were back in her bedroom, falling gently with her onto the bed. "I think before long you and I might have to figure out some other arrangement, you know, something beyond this whole I only get a couple of days with you on the weekends bit of business. Getting through the week is downright torture anymore and I can't even imagine what this one will be like."

Buffy's eyes widened. "What exactly did you have in mind about mending that issue?" she asked, nudging him on to his back. She lifted one thigh across his lap and straddled him, her hands toying with the fabric of his shirt. 

"I'm not exactly sure yet," he admitted. "But sooner rather than later I'm not going to handle this whole one of us drives away all the time nonsense, and this whole not seeing each other through the week, the whole not getting to sleep or wake up next to you... Hell, I'm pretty sure I'm already there. Going home is the fucking last thing my ass wants to do. I mean, I know have work waiting for me, I have packing for the trip to do over the next few days, I probably need to give my parents some sort of heads up about what's going on here... but I'd be a lot happier just to stay here with you like this, or drag you back to LA with me," he told her with a smirk. 

Buffy swallowed hard. "Are you sure you don't just want to run out of here as fast as you can? Leave me behind and go back to being Mister Hot Shot Playboy who could have any woman he wanted?" 

Angel's head rolled back and forth across the bed. "You're all I want," he told her in a thick voice. 

Buffy shivered as she met his dark gaze. "You're all I want, too, Angel," she whispered back to him. 

Angel's hand lifted to the back of her head, tangling in the messy locks, pulling her back down to him. 

OoOoO

Nestled firmly against his side, she watched as the light filtering in through her curtains slowly dimmed until the darkness fully took over. Neither of them dared to move, both choosing to ignore the minutes ticking by, each one a silent reminder that it was time to say goodbye. She knew that he should have left hours ago as it was already nearing midnight. He'd attempted to a bit earlier, but somehow those farewell kisses turned into them all tangled up together back in bed. 

They still hadn't made love, which a part of her was grateful that he wasn't the type to push, but the more time she spent wrapped up in his arms, the more she seemed to think about what it might feel like to have him inside her. Technically they had only been together a few days and she didn't want to rush, but their relationship seemed to be running on its own timeline regardless. She leaned up a bit to glance at the illuminated number on her alarm clock, before tightening her arm around him squeezing her eyes closed as though those simple actions could prolong the inevitable. 

"It's getting late," she mumbled against his smooth skin, her head coming back to rest against his chest, everything in her screaming to beg him to stay. 

His head tilted to lay back against hers, "Just a few more minutes," he whispered his lips barely grazing her forehead. 

His sister had already called twice, and the last time he hadn't even answered, his mouth too busy with other things. Everytime he looked at the damn time he would tell himself thirty more minutes, and every single time those minutes passed, he would promise himself only thirty more. It was a never ending cycle, that he, in all honesty wasn't sure he was strong enough to break. 

He had somehow managed to pull himself together earlier, to get his things all packed away-save for a couple of his shirts that she had now claimed as her own- and get dressed, but he hadn't even made it to the front door before he was carrying her back through the small duplex to get lost in her all over again. He was relatively new to this whole boyfriend thing, and the last thing he ever wanted to do was make her uncomfortable but he was finding it increasingly difficult not to claim her as his own. 

The more time they spent together, the more time they spent getting to know each other on those deeper levels, the more he felt that need growing inside of him. It was different than anything he had ever felt though, he didn't want to fuck her for his own pleasure, he wanted feel her silky walls around him as he took her to heights she couldn't even imagine. He wanted to be the one who showed her that sex could be so much more than anything she had ever experienced. He wanted to bury himself so deep that she wouldn't even remember anyone had ever been there before him, and then he never wanted to walk away or watch her leave again. 

His parents, Cordelia, Lindsey, they were all in for one hell of a surprise because as far as he was concerned he was done searching, he'd found the one he wanted to spend forever with, he was never more sure of anything in his life. 

Even though they glossed over some of the heavier topics, such as how hard this whole weekend only business was, at some point they were going to have an actual conversation about it. He couldn't keep doing this, there were too many miles between them. He wanted her in his bed and his arms, every single day. He wanted to wake up with her next to him, and fall asleep with her pressed tightly against him, just as she was right now. He wanted the lazy weekends, the exhaustingly long work days, the dinners, the breakfast, the fighting and making up, he wanted to see her filling every inch of his home and making it theirs, he wanted it all. 

OoOoO

For the second time in one night he found himself holding her to him at the front door. Cordelia calling a third time had finally given them the shove they needed to roll out of bed and find some clothes, though he wasn't sure what was more tempting Buffy nude or Buffy clothed only in one of his shirts. Cordy had made him promise to call when he made it back to the house even though he tried to tell her that she shouldn't wait up for him. At this rate he wasn't going to make it back to L.A. until well after midnight, and he knew she had to work in the morning, but being her stubborn self she absolutely refused, telling him that it didn't matter she wouldn't be able to sleep until she knew he made it back safely from the hell hole. 

He really did have half the mind to just say screw it and make the drive in the morning, but L.A. traffic on a Monday no less was sure to be a beast. He would of had to leave early enough to stop by the house to get changed, and figuring all that in, realistically it only would have bought them a couple more hours. None of which they would probably spend sleeping, and the last thing he wanted to do was leave her exhausted and facing an entire days worth of work. 

"I should probably go," he whispered for the third time. He had her pinned against the door again, his hands holding her to him as closely as he could possibly manage. 

She was desperately trying to keep it together, she hated crying, most especially in front of other people, and the last thing she wanted to do was come across as some needy ass girlfriend that he felt he couldn't even say goodbye too, but she was fucking failing miserably. 

Swallowing past the lump in her throat, she buried her face against him as the first stream of tears fell. "Shh," he tried to soothe her, "Please don't cry beautiful." 

She shook her head against him, "I'm not," she managed, but they both knew it was a lie. 

He forced her eyes back to his, "It's only a few days, even less than last time with you coming earlier on Friday." 

He wasn't going to bring it up just yet, but he already knew that as soon as he walked into the office tomorrow he was going to have a talk with his boss about taking an extra day or two next week. They were already going to have a long weekend together because of the holiday, but it was going to be a long weekend spent with his family, and as selfish as it was, he wanted some time to have her all to himself too. He was hoping that he could it all squared away with his job tomorrow, that way he could surprise her with the news after work, and hopefully she would be able to feel a little better about having to be apart after everything that had come to pass this very eventful weekend and give her something extra to look forward to as well. 

He knew he'd feel a hell of a lot better to know he would have less time to wait until he could see her again.... especially right now as he stared down at her, feeling like his heart wanted to rip out of his chest looking into those green eyes filling up with tears again. "I'm going to miss you. Probably way more than I should."

Angel's thumbs tried keeping up with the next little path of tears that fell down her beautiful face. "I'm going to miss you, too, Angel. I have never felt like this in my life and even a few days away from you seems to get harder and harder each time."

Angel pulled her closer, pressing his lips to the middle of her forehead. "I know, Beautiful," he whispered. 

Buffy sighed. "I think you might have to band-aid this one, just telling me goodbye and rushing out of here because otherwise I'm going to just keep falling apart or we will keep rushing back off to bed... though that's certainly not something I am exactly opposed to..."

OoOoO

Angel had wound up putting Buffy on the phone with him before he even took a single step out of her place and he only ended the call after he was back in his own driveway, despite the fact she had fallen asleep against all her best efforts to stay awake until he got home about twenty minutes ago. Sending her a quick message to confirm he had gotten home, sending her goodnight wishes, and telling her he missed her and that he would talk to her tomorrow. 

Dialing Cordy, he held the phone between his chin and shoulder as he grabbed his bag and started for the door. 

"Are you really, like,  _ with  _ her now?" Cordelia asked, yawning for about the tenth time since he'd gotten her on the phone and after he made sure to tell her a little about the weekend and that he was home safe and sound. 

Angel smiled and confirmed such rumors to be true once more and asked if she'd have lunch with him so they could talk more about everything going on. 

OoOoO

"You're going to Sunnydale...  _ again _ ?" Cordelia asked, her eyes wide as he mentioned he was going to cut early from work to go back to visit Buffy before driving them back up this way to do the whole camping trip. 

"Yes," he answered, thanking the waitress for refilling his coffee cup. He'd been downing his fair share of the hot beverage all morning and still felt like he was ready to just go crawl in bed while wishing Buffy was beside him. "Sunnydale isn't exactly my ideal location to go visiting but... that's where she is. And, fuck, I miss her when she's not around. These little weekends together just doesn't seem like enough."

Cordelia stared at him long and hard for a moment. "I don't want to see you getting hurt, Angel. I know I am Team Leader of the parade of people wanting to see you fall in love and settle down and just be happy and content with someone and the whole shebang.. but part of me just honestly came to terms with it just was never going to happen I think... and then... Buffy was the last thing I expected, the last person I would have expected for you to wind up so taken with and I don't know where to even begin sometimes, Angel."

"You're acting like I had any more warning about any of this," he chuckled. "I don't even know how to explain any of it. I feel like I was done for the second I even laid eyes on her and just didn't know it yet, not at the time, you know. Everything just feels different when I'm around her, like it's where I'm supposed to be, even when it scared the shit out of me because I don't want to fuck it up and I have no idea what I'm doing here."

"I don't want you to fuck it up either, if that helps anything."

OoOoO

After finally making it through the exhausting, never ending Monday work day, having caught up with Buffy about their days before taking a couples hours worth of a nap, Angel nervously made his way over to his parent's house. Stepping inside, it didn't take long to find his parents playfully arguing about the camping trip ahead off in the kitchen, his mom working on dinner while his dad was teasing her as he read through the paper. 

After exchanging easy greetings and being invited to stay for dinner, he got roped into the conversation as per usual. "I am just pointing out the time will eventually come where sleeping on the ground just might not be the smartest thing for some old folks like us to be doing."

Angel chuckled, "Oh please. We head out there with blow up air mattresses and our giant pillows and blankets. I think you'll be camping into your hundreds," he told them. "Speaking of which... I hope it's alright if I invited an extra person to come along for the trip."

His mom turned around from her spot at the stove. "Lindsey? Because, Sweetie, we already know he's coming with Cordelia."

"No, I mean he's coming... but I invited someone along, too."

Turning back to her food, his mother shrugged. "I don't see why not. You wanting to bring someone from work?" she asked. 

"Uhh... no," he drawled out slowly. "I have actually been seeing someone... the past couple of weeks. Well, we weren't officially anything until a few days ago but we had been spending the last several weekends together and everything."

Mrs. Chase dropped the spoon in her hand before turning around to face him again. "You're seeing someone?" she asked slowly, her eyes narrowing as she tried to wrap her head around what he seemed to saying. "As in you have a girlfriend kind of seeing someone? You're in an actual relationship with someone?"

Angel chuckled a little as her voice rose to a higher pitch it seemed with each word. "Yes. And Cordelia and Lindsey already know and I know she was dying to tell you but I asked her to let me figure out how to come talk to you both about it. Especially.... especially because I knew you would have been worried this past weekend and she and I, I promise you, were stressed out enough for all of us."

"I am more confused by the moment."

Angel took in a deep breath. "I was in Sunnydale this past weekend."

Both of his parents seemed to turn ghostly pale at the near mention of the town that held so many horrors for their family. "Why on Earth would you go there?" his mother harshly whispered out, her hand coming up to toy with her necklace.

"Because Buffy Summers is there," he answered. "Because when I went with Cordelia a few weeks ago to speak at that engagement, she found me, and since then we've been spending a lot of time getting to know each other…" He paused for a moment to assess their reactions, both of them still looked more worried than anything, but he could see just a hint of a smile tugging at his mother's lips. "Last weekend more or less cemented things," he cleared his throat, even though he cared deeply for Buffy, admitting that he was in a relationship out loud still felt a bit awkward, especially to his parents. "We're umm, together now." 

It only took a few seconds for the words to register before his mom was throwing her arms around him, tears falling from her eyes. She kept going back and forth between berating him for sneaking off to Sunnydale, and gushing about how happy she was that he had finally decided to settle down after so long. 

Guiding him over to one of the bar stools, she continued to ask question after question about the little blonde she'd only caught a few glimpses of back at the hospital. She was fairly certain that they had spoken once or twice but her memory of that time was understandably a bit muddled. Every time he answered she would follow up with how she just couldn't believe that he, nor his sister had let them in on his little secret.

"So this is serious then," she asked after he gave her the cliff notes version of his previous weekend. "You actually see a future with her?" 

Angel nodded, "I think so. I mean I care about her, but we're still trying to figure everything out. Sunnydale is a pretty good distance from L.A. so I figured our next step will be working out a solution to that." He shrugged, "Neither of us have proved to be very good at this long distance thing." 

His father looked back up from his paper, "You and this girl have one hell of a past son, you sure you know what you're getting yourself into?" 

"Absolutely," Angel smirked, trying to bite back his grin as he answered his dad. His mom was the queen of turning a blind eye to his wild ways, his dad however was not. Though he never gave him too much grief about it either, where his mom always tried to push him into a relationship or set him up with every friend of friends daughter she could think of, his dad was much more lax, always telling him not to settle. He always urged him to be careful of course, but he was never one to harp at him about getting married or settling down, and anytime Cordy and their mom started in he always had his back, reminding the girls that no matter how hard you try, it just wasn't one of those situations you could force. 

OoOoO

The next thing he knew several hours had passed, his mom had stuffed him full of her famous homemade meatballs between her attempts to pull every single detail she could from him. Angel was fairly certain she already had their entire wedding planned, and multiple name options for her future grandchildren by the time his dad pulled him off into the study. 

Forever the protector his dad wanted to make sure that his feelings were genuine, that he wasn't just leading Buffy on to get in her pants the way he had so many others in the past. Most importantly though, he wanted to make sure that Angel was aware just how much this was going to hurt his mother if he up and changed his mind about this girl after filling his mom’s head with all these ideas about the possibility of him finally settling down. 

His parents had been together for nearly forty years, and his dad had always been fiercely protective of his wife. Growing up his mom had always been the disciplinarian, but the few times his dad had gotten involved it was because he'd been caught in a lie or done something else to deliberately disobey and upset her. They really were the picture perfect image of wedded bliss, and a huge reason as to why he never had tried to settle down before. 

All his life he'd watched the two of them, seen just how they looked at each other when they thought him and sister weren't paying attention. Sure they had their arguments, ups and downs like every couple did, but they always worked it out, both of them far too in love with the other to ever even contemplate separating. For nearly as long as he could remember, he always asked himself two things when he met a girl… could he picture her as the mother to his children, and could he see her by his side after age got a hold of them, when they were worn and grey. If he couldn't imagine that he very well did not see the point in putting forth the effort a relationship required when you already knew it wasn't going anywhere.

OoOoO

She had no idea how she was supposed to make it all the way to Friday missing him the way she was. It was unbearable, work crawled by at unbelievably slow pace, each minute stretching by, dragging on so long she felt herself ready to snap by the end of day. Then those few hours she got him on the phone each night always blew by faster than she could blink, it wasn't fair, he was right this whole ninety miles away stuff was for the birds. 

Though she didn't yet have a solution for that either. Both of them had their own lives, jobs, families and friends, not to mention that they had only just started dating, it would be crazy for either of them to even think about moving at this point and yet she couldn't help but get lost in those ideas. Of course she wanted to know what it was like to wake up next to him every morning, but more than that she just wanted him. She wanted to know his morning routine, what days he shaved on, how he looked exhausted and haggard walking through the door after work, she wanted him with her on nights it stormed, she wanted fights and making up, she wanted lazy dinners in bed, and listening to his heart as they fell asleep, and despite having just gotten together she didn't want it all through the damn phone. 

After work she'd gone out for drinks with the gang, and even though they hadn't done anything intentional, she couldn't help but feel like the fifth wheel. She was happy for her friends, she really was, but being happy for them didn't make it suck any less for herself. 

Angel seemed just as miserable with the whole situation and she'd sort of started a little game with him. Just to make him crazy she would send him some sexy little pose every time she got the chance. Last night after they'd finally managed to say goodbye and hang up she'd snapped the perfect angle of herself in a sexy little lace baby doll lingerie number that she had wound up purchasing on a complete whim while simply browsing around aimlessly online, all with him in mind when she saw it. She'd clicked to add to her shopping cart and made sure to get express shipping for her purchase so it would be here in time for the weekend. It wasn't something you would normal see and suddenly think it was screaming "bring on a camping trip" or anything, but oh, she could see herself slipping it on and surprising him one late evening so well. 

Giving him a little sneak peak wasn't going to hurt anyone, either. 

She was pretty sure it hadn't even been a full five seconds after she hit the send button with that photo when her phone started to ring again. A large smile graced her face as she answered the video call where he was bound and determined to know more about just what she was wearing and if he could see more, that goodbye and goodnight nixed for the time being. 

OoOoO

Angel found himself biting his tongue nearly every time he and Buffy spoke the past couple of days, all these hours apart were feeling like fucking days, every single one of them passing far too slowly, an urge to want to just ask her to move to Los Angeles and in with him swirling around his brain, or to ask her how she might feel about finding somewhere in between their two cities to settle in at just so they could be together more often then these back and forth weekends, or to just start blurting out something else just as crazy of an idea as those. Angel knew that he may not be familiar with the whole dating game but it didn't take much to know asking a girl to move in with you mere days into your relationship was typically frowned upon, especially someone who had been through all that Buffy Summers had... but he missed her, and she was too fucking far away. 

He craved things he had never even had with Buffy yet but would find himself picturing so clearly in his mind. He craved falling asleep next to her, craved the thought of waking up beside her on the daily, wanting to see her daily grasped onto him like nothing ever had before. He missed her touch desperately, the way she felt against him, how she seemed to meld perfectly into him, just being able to look over and getting to hear her laugh or to see her smile at him, easily falling into any conversation about anything... how being around her made him feel at ease, like he was exactly where he belonged, where he needed to be. 

Given he was cutting out early to surprise her back in Sunnydale, a little note he had decided to keep to himself a little longer, he at least had some distraction through the days as the crept by. Work helped there well enough, as did packing and planning everything for the long weekend ahead. He first got a duffel bag together for just his time with Buffy then went to work on preparing for the rest of the weekend, checking tents, all of the air mattresses, gathering pillows and blankets, extra clothes, and just what felt like an endless string of supplies by the end of it. 

He went shopping for his last minute items and his portion of the grocery list, dropping food off at his parents' house for them to take to the camping site when the time came and working out any left out details before having to swear once more he would be okay in the small town full of horrors as far as any of them were concerned. He was pretty sure he would never feel entirely comfortable entering into Sunnydale so couldn't say too much about the endless grief he got from his sister or those looks that would cross his parents' faces when it was brought up. 

Hopefully, sooner rather than later, they would have a way around all of that he could only silently wish.


	12. Chapter Twelve

"Is it Friday yet?" Buffy practically whined into the phone as she answered, walking across the parking lot toward her car. 

Angel chuckled on the other end of the line. "Rough day?" 

She just grunted, slipping into the driver's seat. "I will happily fill you in about all of it later, right now I'd just like to forget about it, though... talk about your day maybe? Let me get lost in some fantasy about coming home and falling into your arms and how you would just make everything better?"

There was a short pause before, "Well, what if I told you I was sitting on the hood of my car, right here in your driveway, just kind of waiting for you to get here so I can surprise you with exactly that?" Angel asked. 

Buffy stilled, her eyes growing wide as she tried to process what he was saying. "W-wait. You're here? H-how? What?"

"Waiting until Friday to be with you again seemed a little too impossible, sooo I got some extra time off so I could come surprise you."

Suddenly, the day seemed to be turning around. 

After letting herself get a little too excited and squealing "Are you serious?!" and having to convince Angel that while she typically hated surprises this was one she was one hundred percent behind, she was soon all but flying away from the building and hurrying back to home. 

Buffy could feel her heart already pounding as she spotted the first sign of him and was nearly in tears by the time she was able to throw her body into his arms, her face burying into his chest as he hugged her closer. "You're here," she said in a ragged whisper. 

Angel's hands rubbed up and down her back as his arms continued to squeeze her in a tight hug. "I needed to see you," he whispered and it was just a moment before her head tilted back and his lips captured hers, making the world around them completely seem to fade away so it was just them. 

"I don't think you could have picked a better time," she answered, her arms slipping from being pinned between their bodies to circling around his neck and pulling him back to her. She still couldn't even believe he was here, early, that she would be getting this much time with him between this little visit and them going camping with his family, and she would get him all to herself before they joined up with everyone else. 

Peeking in into his backseat as he lifted her up, she whispered, "Do you want to come inside?" against his ear, her fingers toying with his dark strands. 

"Thought you'd never ask," Angel smirked, easily getting to his black bag and carrying it and her to the front door. 

Having sat her down so she could unlock the door for them, Buffy watched as he walked from behind her, carrying his bag off to her bedroom. She still couldn't believe that he was really here, that he'd come all this way just so they could have a few more precious hours together, and that he'd managed to pull it all off without uttering a single word. 

She waited for him to toss his bag to the side before jumping back in his arms, locking her legs back around his waist. "I missed you." 

His fingers bit into the flesh of her thighs, pulling her just a little tighter against him. Her body was calling to him in a way he'd never experienced, not even with her, these days apart were far too long, and he hadn't even made it to Friday. 

Leaning her back, he followed her onto the bed, capturing her lips again, he tried to convey with more than words just how much he too missed her. 

OoOoO

She hadn't known it was possible for someone else to have such control over her body. All she wanted, all she could think about was how badly she wanted more, to be closer to him in every way, and it seemed his thoughts mirrored her own. He was a man possessed, pulling and tugging away all of their clothing until she was spread bare before him. 

She watched as he sat up, shifting his weight back to his knees. Without much thought her thighs circled back around his now nude waist, closing all the space left between them. Angel's eyes rolled back as his hard shaft brushed against her glistening folds. Taking a deep breath he grasped onto every shred of control he could manage, never in his life had he ever wanted to be inside of someone so badly. 

Gripping his cock, he guided the rigid flesh back against her warm center, watching as her head fell to the side, the sound of his name just barely escaping her lips. 

"I want…" 

"You want what," he smirked kissing his way back up her body, giving special attention to her full mounds and the peaks on top of each. They hadn't really talked about taking that next step or when it should be, though things between them seemed to have a way of happening in their own time regardless. Settling back above her, he once again wondered how he'd ever been able to live without this, to exist without her. She completed him in a way he hadn't even known was possible. 

Her small hands slipped back around his neck pulling him back to her. She still wasn't sure what she'd ever done to deserve this, but she hoped with everything in her that she never lost it. Even though it had only been a few short weeks, she could no longer imagine her life without him in it. It was hard enough surviving the week without him, she had no idea how she'd cope if he was no longer there. 

Her fingers trailed over his brow, down his smooth cheeks, her gaze met his and she got lost in those dark depths for a few seconds drinking in absolutely everything she could about the moment. She wanted him, in every way, she wanted to know how he felt from the inside. She was well aware that things between them were moving at an unprecedented pace, but that had sort of been their theme all along.

He had literally saved her life, she already trusted him more than she had ever trusted anyone before. She knew with all of her heart and soul that he would never do a single thing to hurt her, never intentionally. Her body felt like it was humming whenever he was near, that unspoken invisible pull always drawing them closer. It was a connection that she hadn't believed really existed, and most certainly did not know how to even begin describing. 

Her nose brushed up against his as she teased him, she was forcing him to her only to barely graze her lips on him before pulling away, a tiny smirk playing on her face, clearly enjoying how crazy it made him. 

Having had enough, he gently forced her arms from him, using a single hand, he pinned her small arms above them. He watched her long lashes flutter open, those emerald orbs locked onto him, nearly drowning him in the never-ending swirls of color. His head dropped, she had no idea who she was taunting here. Starting at the soft curve of her shoulder he left a lazy trail, his tongue slipping out to taste her with every inch, he really hoped he wasn't supposed to be the level headed one here, 'cause in no reality was he strong enough to deny her anything, especially not this. 

"What do you want," he repeated, this time his voice barely more than a whisper next to her ear. 

Her heart was pounding so hard, she was almost positive she could hear the blood flowing through her own veins. He released her hands, and she instantly brought them back around him, she never wanted to forget how this felt, how he felt. 

Her teeth rolled over her lip as she pulled his head back down to hers. She was nervous, but she didn't have any doubts, this was exactly what she wanted, she had never been more sure of anything in her entire life. 

"You," she breathed into the small space between them. 

Holding her gaze, his chest squeezed as the full implication of her words struck him. He may be the one with more experience in this area but you wouldn't known with the way his hands began to tremble the instant she spoke. Pressing his lips to hers again, he moved with purpose trying his best to convey all those feelings, all those emotions he was having such a hard time putting into words. 

He'd been just about to pull away, to ask her just one more time if she was sure this was what she wanted, when the shrill sound of her phone ringing pierced the bubble they had fallen into. 

"Shit," she gasped, breaking her away her own self, her eyes big and wild as she glanced around. There was no way this was happening, their luck couldn't possibly be that bad twice. Her fingers finally finding the hard plastic of her phone somewhere off to the side of them, she tried to ignore Angel's bewildered expression as she quickly answered the device. 

"Hello," she squeaked. A blush creeping over her just hearing her mother's voice while she was all naked and wrapped up in his arms. 

Angel smirked as he half listened to her conversation, but in all honesty he was much more interested in the body pressed so intimately against him. His mouth swirled around one of her perk nipples, her fingers gripped at his hair, silently begging him to relent but he ignored the pleas. Apparently she'd forgotten all about meeting her mom for dinner tonight, she was understandably a little worried with her running off for another weekend even if it was with him. 

"Twenty minutes mom, I swear, we'll be there."

Twenty minutes, that was no where near enough time. He swallowed, his mind racing with how little time that left for them in this moment, and they still apparently needed to get re-dressed, look presentable, on top of getting from Buffy's place to her mother's. 

"We?" Buffy squeaked, her back arching so she was deeper into his touch despite her hands' idea of pushing him away. "O-oh, Angel is here. H-he surprised me..." Buffy tried to explain though she was having a hard time keeping up with the conversation. It wasn't but moments later when she rushed to end the call, promising once more they would be there shortly. "I completely forgot," she mumbled as Angel's body began to move lower, his lips casting a trail down her stomach. 

She tried to apologize but he chuckled, shaking his head despite the fact that it seemed as though his entire body was aching with need to be inside her. 

Buffy gasped, his name falling from between her lips again, as he couldn't help but find his way between her creamy thighs, taking a moment to melt into her, tasting her, letting her take over his every sense for a moment. Forcing himself to pull away, he smirked, his palms running against her thighs. "Come on now, woman, I can't have you showing up late."

"I can't think of a single reason as to why not right now," she breathed out heavily. 

Angel's little smirk only grew as he shot her a wink. "It's probably a good idea to get you fed and build up some of stamina anyway... you know, with everything I'm planning on doing with you tonight," he offered, starting to pull away so he could get dressed. Buffy seemed to shiver as she thought about what all that could possibly mean.

OoOoO

Splashing some water on her face, Buffy tried not to blush at the image staring back at her from the mirror, one that certainly seemed to picture how exactly she felt inside pretty damn well, she looked as needy as she felt. Brushing her hair, she tried to calm herself down, but even as she tried to think of anything but wanting to continue off where she and Angel had stopped earlier... it just seemed to circle back. 

Angel had whispered to her, dropping a kiss on her temple, before she came in here to try and rush and get ready that if she wound up changing her mind between now and then it was okay and she'd about laughed in his face. If she was going to change her mind about anything it would be even trying to wait a second longer to be with him and just let whatever happened with her overprotective mother showing up and catching them or whatever else might come to be just happen so she could experience what she had been picturing and dreaming about for weeks now. 

He'd also offered to just stay back and let her have the dinner with her mother as scheduled but she knew there was no way she would even be able to attempt to get through it without him near, her mind would be absolutely everywhere else the entire time, and she couldn't finally have him before her after all these days that just dragged on and on to be away from him again so quickly. 

OoOoO

Angel wasn't so sure he was going to survive through this little visit and dinner at Joyce's house. He'd already had to awkwardly hug her as he was trying to hide the hard on he couldn't seem to get rid of, Buffy helping absolutely none there... especially on the ride over, constantly trying to keep his hands to himself as Buffy would sit on his lap, brush against him when there weren't extra eyes on the two of them. Hell, even when she wasn't purposefully trying to drive him mad, it was taking all he had not to embarrass the both of them. 

Once they actually sat down at the table he found it was a little easier, the conversation didn't take too much to keep up with and a lot of it he just stayed quiet and let them talk. He did have to promise a number of times her safety was his top priority and that he would fill her in, as would Buffy and anyone else she needed to hear from, all the information once they chose their actual tent site and would keep her up to date with all of their happenings when they left the campground. He even made a list for her of everyone who was coming and the many ways to get in touch with each and every one of them, including the main office, all hospitals and non emergency police stations in the general area. 

"Is it weird that while I am feeling terrified about this whole thing... I also feel a strange sense of ease that it's you?" Joyce asked him. 

Angel shrugged, he figured it was just one of those things that came along with their history. "I know you don't know me very well, and we're trying to all figure this out bit by bit, we're all still kind of getting to know one another still but I'm not going to let anything happen to your daughter. Never again," he promised. "I promise it's not all scary and doom and gloom, we're close enough to everything yet secluded at the same time, there will be people all around her who love her already and will make sure she's safe and having a good time." 

Their conversation ventured a bit off to his sister and his parents and how they were feeling about everything. Angel smiled a little as he mentioned his mother's extremes about the news of the two of them together. "I'm pretty sure at some point - at least - my mom will probably try and discuss the wedding I'm sure she's already planning and plans for every other holiday to follow and about a billion other things." His head turned toward Buffy again, "Fair warning and all," he teased. 

"It sounds like our mom's will get along swimmingly," Buffy laughed.

OoOoO

Buffy's eyes followed Angel as he walked to the car, leaving the two Summers' women alone for a few so they could talk and go ahead and say their in-person goodbyes for the weekend. Joyce gave a hint of a smile as she tugged a loose strand of hair behind Buffy's ear. "I'm not sure if he's said anything or if he even realizes... but that boy is absolutely taken and head over heels in love with you," Joyce told her. 

Buffy's eyes widened a bit as she looked back at her mom. "It's a little early for talk like that," Buffy stammered, even though she had almost blurted those very words out to him more than once, and her thoughts had her going crazy wondering if she wasn't already there her own self. 

Joyce's shoulder leaned into the inside of the door frame. "I remember how you would talk about him... even years ago... with the short time you two even had around one another. I think there's always been something there, Buffy.

OoOoO 

Her mother's words hung in the back of her mind the entire ride home. There had been a number of times in recent days that she'd nearly let those words come tumbling out, but she hadn't really taken the time to decipher what it all meant. She didn't really believe in love, sure she knew it was out there, those little old couples you would see out and about still holding hands after decades together. That just wasn't the future she'd ever really envisioned for herself, especially not after the attack. 

It may not seem like it when she was with him, but she still held quite a few of her own scars from that night. Whenever he was around though, all those fears and anxieties seemed to dim, they didn't completely disappear but having him near definitely made her feel better, safer about everything. When she was with him, instead of planning exit strategies, or taking head counts of how many people were in her general vicinity, she got to relax and just be a normal girl again. 

The problem was when he left, all those racing thoughts, the fears, the anxieties, they all came rushing back with an intensity she hadn't even known was possible. Instead of worrying about herself, and whatever situation she might stumble into, she would find herself spending countless hours lying awake terrified that something was going to happen to him. Her mind would conjure up image after horrible image, coming up with everything from him being in an automobile accident, to him getting sick, being bitten by some poisonous creature… pretty much you name it, she'd thought it. 

So lost in her own mind, she nearly jumped out of her skin when his long fingers reached across the console to intertwine with hers. Taking his eyes off the road for a moment, he glanced in her direction not bothering to hide the worry in his eyes. "Penny for your thoughts," he murmured, bringing her hand to his lips. She seemed to get a lost there for a few minutes, her mom had chosen the absolute worst time to interrupt them earlier, and there was nothing he wanted more than to go back and pick up exactly where they left off, but he didn't want her to feel pressured into anything, especially not that. 

She shrugged a little, while she squeezed his hand tighter. "I was just thinking about how much I love the days with you in them," she sighed, "It's not fair." 

Angel smirked as he pulled into the driveway of her duplex, he knew exactly what she meant, but he wasn't trying to delve into that heavy of a topic right now, though it was nice to know that her thoughts echoed his on the subject. They were going to have to figure something out, and soon, he couldn't keep spending days away from her at a time. Hell at this point he didn't want to be away from her for a minute, much less an entire work week. "We'll figure it out," he promised, putting the car into park.

Images from last week danced through his mind, he couldn't believe it hadn't even been a full week since that night she'd all but claimed him as her own. In some ways it felt like he had known her forever, like they had always been together. Then in others it felt as though they had just met, like he'd only been granted a precious few hours to discover every single detail about the small blonde girl he had tried to save once upon a time. "But the last thing I want to do right now is think about having to tell you goodbye. Again," he emphasized. 

The sound of his phone ringing interrupted whatever she'd been about to say. Buffy glanced down to see a picture of Lindsey holding Cordelia in front of a Christmas tree. Angel let out a small groan, he really wanted to ignore the call but it was Cordy and he knew better than to think she wouldn't just call right back. 

Buffy giggled as she watched his inner struggle play out across his face, it was almost like she knew exactly what he was thinking. Both of their families seemed to have a knack for interrupting them at the absolute worst times. Leaning over she brushed her lips against his cheek just as he answered, apparently he had at least remembered to call her this time, to let her know that he'd made it safely to Sunnydale, but their mom was still kind of freaking so Cordy decided to call one more time just to check up on him. 

OoOoO

At some point Lindsey overheard Cordy talking on the phone and took over, somehow convincing Angel to switch the call to a video chat. It was obvious Lindsey was purposely being obnoxious, but seeing Angel all irritated was kind of cute so she played along. 

Safely back inside, Angel plopped down on the couch as Lindsey recanted the new Mexican place he'd found for lunch, and she wasted no time crawling into his lap, her legs falling easily around his strong thighs. Making sure she wasn't in view of his camera, she set out in her own way of driving him absolutely crazy. 

She'd nearly gotten his belt completely undone before he fully caught onto what she was doing. His eyes went wide and he swallowed hard as Cordy's voice came back over the phone, his cock strained against its denim confines, wearing jeans had been a terrible fucking idea. 

Angel let her fidget with his button and zipper for a few seconds, before passing the phone off to her so that he could get them undone. He fought to keep his eyes from rolling back as he watched her tiny fingers grasp him, her palm softly squeezing his pulsating flesh while she kept the straightest face, smiling and easily following along in the conversation like she wasn't working him to the brink of insanity. 

His head fell back against the soft cushion of the sofa while she continued her little game. He half listened as Buffy repeated not only her address but her mothers as well. He'd been right to think that his parents, especially his mom wouldn't handle him being here very well, but it was just something all of them were going to have to get used to, as long as Buffy was a part of his life so would be Sunnydale. 

He took the phone back when he heard Lindsey suggesting that he should give his mother a call before they turned in, fucking asshole. "I'm not calling Mom," he groaned, this was exactly the reason why he'd made sure to call all of them when he first got here, before he'd even called Buffy. "It's late, I already talked to her, we're going to see her tomorrow, she'll be fine," he tried to argue while ignoring that small stab of guilt he felt saying those words. 

Sliding off his lap, she came up on her knees next to the couch. His dark eyes followed her every move, her blonde hair feathering lightly across his knees, the top side of his thighs, Angel had to fight the urge to moan and to let his head fall back once again as her hands moved forward to reach him. 

"You don't have to be all snippety about it," Cordelia growled out at him through the phone. Buffy tried not to chuckle, her eyes sparking with lust and mischief. 

Letting out a long, deep breath, he tried to rush out an apology to the two of them over his tone and explain that he knew they were all just worried but he was fine being here and to echo the previous sentiment that he would see them all later tomorrow, that he would even make sure to call them before they headed out come morning to make sure everything was in order for the weekend. 

The fact that Buffy had closed in on him, her mouth peppering random kisses across his scarred abdomen where she had pushed his shirt up a little more out of the way, her tongue swirling around the desperately angry head of his manhood before testing out different licks and flicks of her tongue up and down his manhood wasn't helping a damn thing when it came to trying to reassure everyone that everything was fine but after a few more moments he finally was able to end the call, fling his phone off into a chair sitting halfway across the room and just let his focus fall to the pretty blonde who'd seemingly taken over his entire life all over again these past several weeks. 

OoOoO

While she had been bedded in the past by a few of her old boyfriends, Buffy had never dived much into exploring ways to be intimate with someone and couldn't - nor had really ever wanted to - imagine herself doing nearly everything she had been with Angel. Never once had she been interested in, let alone craved, going down on someone, it had always just rubbed her the wrong way for whatever reason. But everything felt different when it came to him, she craved him in ways she'd never imagined... not in the past with others and she certainly hadn't been thinking that was what life had in store for her after that fateful night.

But here she was... 

Missing him while they were apart was obvious but the full scope of all the ways she missed him had been a little bit of a surprise. How badly she craved moments like these had been more than she'd been prepared for after he'd gone back home.

Squeezing her thighs together, Buffy palmed Angel with one hand while she licked up the underside of his cock. Angel breathed out her name harshly, his hands reaching out to her, needing to feel her in some way or another. 

Shifting her position again slightly, she licked her lips before letting them brush against the very tip of him, enclosing her mouth over him slowly. Her head bobbed up and down, taking an inch at a time with every down stroke, her eyes locked in with his dark gaze the entire time.

OoOoO

Angel's hips began to jerk up off of his seat on the couch, seeking more of her. It didn't matter how many women he'd been with, how many times he'd been in a position close to this one... not a single one of them compared to this one, particular blonde. It was like she set his body on fire with every glance, every touch and he couldn't get enough of it. 

With a groan, he eased her actions so he could pull her back up to him from the floor and into his lap, his lips meeting hers hungrily. Buffy's hips swiveled against him this way and that, her body craving friction, which only caused them both to moan out loudly. Buffy's fingers danced against the top of his shoulders before she leaned in to whisper her wishes to continue this back in the bedroom. 

Not needing to be told twice, he easily lifted their entwined bodies from the couch, Buffy's legs securely wrapped around him, and his lips never leaving her as he walked toward the hall. 

Earlier, he had felt like a man possessed, and while there was still that need boiling inside of him he didn't feel as utterly desperate as their bodies met the soft comforter. Buffy's hands pulled at his shirt until it fell off to the wayside, hers soon joining it, discarded on the floor. His head tilted, lips nipping at the newly exposed flesh, hands exploring over the lace and silk of her bra, tickling down her sides, busying themselves in releasing her of everything but her sexy little matching bra and panties set. 

Coming back up to his knees, he felt his heart trying to beat out of the confides of his chest as he took in the sight before him, one he knew he would never in a million years get enough of. Her whole body seemed to be glowing, a rosy shade taking over her body, blonde hair pillowing around her face and across her shoulders, lips swollen and slightly parted, chest heavily rising and falling, those green orbs staring at him with such a perfect mixture of innocence and lust... 

Starting at the tips of her toes, his hands began to slide up the length of her strong legs, over the curved band of her small underwear, up and over her stomach, sliding in to frame her ribs. "You don't even know how fucking perfect you are," he whispered, making her blush and shake her head. 

But he ignored the motion, knowing far too better than that. It killed him he'd gone through his life so long without her, absolutely sure he couldn't face a future like that, hating all the missed time he could have had being with her, loving her just like this. It killed him that he knew all too well the horrors she'd had to go through and would forever have to deal with, unsure of how in the hell anyone could have ever hurt her. 

Never had he felt more determined to make sure she knew how he felt, for her to know that he would do anything in this world for her, that he would always protect her, that he would be whatever in the hell she needed him to be so she felt safe, happy... that she would feel like this was what she needed as much as he did. 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Buffy tried her hardest to control her breathing but it seemed like a losing battle as Angel's eyes roamed her now completely nude figure, his tongue darted out to lick his lips, his eyes seemingly like they were trying to figure out just what he wanted to do with her first. 

"Kiss me," she whispered, smiling when his body covered hers again, her legs brushing over him, arms circling around his neck, tugging him even closer. 

Never wanting to deny her anything, Angel's lips found hers, pressingly gently against hers at first. She could feel him lazily settled back against her center, her body calling out for his, she couldn't get close enough. Her fingertips dipped along the scar whose shape she already knew by heart, she knew he was uncomfortable with the markings but everytime she touched the scarred flesh she couldn't help but feel like it was some physical connection each of them shared. 

Her hips rocked and she could feel his rigid flesh teasing her center, a part of her still couldn't believe that they were here, but the bigger part of her had trouble remembering this wasn't how it had always been. 

"Are you sure..." he started, but she pressed her lips against his, effectively silencing whatever he'd been about to say. There wasn't anything she'd ever been more sure about, not in her entire life. 

Coming back on his knees, his eyes rolled back as he guided his aching flesh between her wet folds. Spotting the small foil package off to the side of her, he cursed inwardly at the wretched thought of even the smallest barrier between them. He may have been the definition of a manwhore but he knew how to wrap it up, it had only taken one close call ages ago with Darla for him to make sure that he always had protection in place. 

Though everything felt different now, with her, she'd mentioned before that she wasn't on birth control and hadn't been ever since before the attack, obviously wearing a condom was the responsible thing to do, he knew that, but still the thought sent a tiny wave of repulsion through him. Sooner rather than later they were going to need to have a conversation about it all again, but not now. Right now he needed to inside her, he needed to know, not just imagine how it felt to become one with her, to fill her so deeply neither of them could tell where one ended and the other began, he wanted to wash away any and every remnant of all the other men she'd ever been with. 

Poised at her entrance, his hungry gaze met hers once again, oblivious to his internal dilemma her soft thighs circled him, locking around his waist she desperately tried to pull him closer, to pull him further inside her silky depths. The cutest sound he'd ever heard fell from her lips when she succeeded, nearly making him forgot all about the stupid condom, and everything else except for the feeling of her warmth beginning to surround him. 

Her legs fell lazily around his waist, and within a single breath her body seemed to somehow melt completely against him. A surge of emotions pounded through him, he'd never experienced anything remotely close to this and it took all he had to hold it together. Letting his eyes fall closed, he swallowed hard as his hands wandered around the curve of her hips, the thought of how truly tiny she was flitting across his mind when his own fingertips nearly touched. 

"How are you so fucking perfect," he breathed out, using his hold on her to guide her further onto his aching manhood. Her inner walls already squeezing him so tightly he wasn't sure how long he could possibly expect to last. 

Too lost for words, her only reply was to reach for him, her hands swept back up his arms, across his chest, her fingers dug into the curve of his shoulder just below his neck in an attempt to pull him closer, wanting to feel him against her, needing to taste his lips on hers again. The air around them felt heavy, like it was forming some sort of special cocoon around them, locking out the rest of the world so that they were the only two that existed. 

"Please," she begged, and he finally gave in, falling back over her just as he fully seated himself inside of her hot core. His mouth caught hers just in time to muffle the small groans that escaped, his tongue slipping easily between her soft pink lips while he desperately tried to wait for her body to adjust. 

Her chest heaved beneath him when she finally broke away, the need for air becoming too much. Wanting to remember everything, she forced her eyelids open only to find those dark orbs she loved so much already staring down at her, locking her in place with their intensity. She grinned, "I guess you found a way to make it fit," she joked, nuzzling the side of his nose with her own. 

He smirked, "I told you, nothing to worry about." 

Unable to resist a moment longer, he slowly started to inch his way out of her slick channel, waiting until he was nearly fully withdrawn before forcefully filling her all over again. He gritted his teeth, he'd fully intended on simply teasing her a bit before slipping the damn condom on but somehow he'd ended up making love to her before he could find the damn chance. In that exact moment if it were up to him he'd take the damn risk, but he couldn't put her in that position, not yet. 

His forehead head fell against hers as his movements crept to an achingly slow pace, which caused her eyes to flutter open questioningly looking back up to him. He watched her lips form into a small pout and simply couldn't resist taking them one more time. 

"Stop that," he teased. Then nearly growling he added, "Ten seconds," his breath coming in long drawn out pants against her.

Shifting his weight back to his knees, he couldn't help but moan when her body started to rock against him in protest, or torment, he wasn't sure. Tweaking one of her peaked nipples, his hand continued its pathway down her glorious dips and valleys until she felt his thumb back at her center, teasing her, grazing over her sensitive bundle of nerves with just enough pressure to drive her nearly insane with need. "You could try pulling out," she offered weakly, and Angel couldn't help but groan, she certainly wasn't helping matters. "You have way too much faith in me," he promised, knowing he was nowhere near that strong.

Still working her with one hand, he reached blindly beside them for the cursed contraceptive. Her inner muscles squeezed against him and his whole body nearly shuddered in response. Luckily his free hand clasped onto the corners of the small package right when he'd been about to say fuck it and give in. He watched as her perfectly rounded globes bounced in unison to her thrusts, those soft mewling noises he loved so much signaling him that she was near that edge again. He slowed his movements once again as he tore the corner of the yellow package with his teeth. 

Her teeth rolled back over her lip when she felt him withdraw from inside her, instantly she felt the emptiness envelope her, and no matter how hard she fought against it, she couldn't stop her hips from continuing to rock against him. Already a fine sheet of sweat covered her, her insides clenched as she felt herself losing control under his touch. "Angel," she whined. 

"Hmm?" he mumbled and smirked when she couldn't seem to form the words. "We got all night, Beautiful," he whispered. 

Inside of her or not, Buffy knew she was at a point of no turning back, familiar tremors started pulsating through her entire body, her knees locking around his forearm and holding him in place as waves of pleasure took control. 

OoOoO

The same little sound blessed his ears once more as he re-entered her small body, barely leaving her any time to recover from the orgasm, unable to wait to feel her surrounding around him again any longer. He felt his own body shudder from the contact, unsure now of how he had ever been with anyone who wasn't her. 

He was more convinced than ever that she was all he was going to need the rest of his damn life. 

There weren't enough words to describe how much like "coming home" she felt like, to try and explain that every little thing about this tiny blonde felt like it was handcrafted to be a perfect match, a perfect fit, for himself. 

His lips found hers and she met him with as much desire and need as he felt burning through his entire being. Her back arched slightly, her chest pushing against him, legs trying to draw him nearer as he let himself just get lost for the moment. The urgent need for more soon taking over however, his hips pulling back until he was almost entirely out of her before easily sliding back in. 

Buffy's fingernails dug into the back of his neck as he pushed in and out of her, a slow rhythm that had her letting out a soft moan every time he filled her, one he knew he would never in his life tire of hearing. 

His lips sought out every inch of her they could make it to, his tongue seeking out the taste of her skin, not wanting any inch of her to feel neglected, untouched, unloved. His arms hooking under her, raising her legs to a slightly new position, as the need for more of her started to outweigh anything else. Buffy's breathing was already growing erratic again from his faster thrusts and the fact she didn't have much control in the way he was holding her, her body trying desperately to move against him however. 

OoOoO

Buffy was wondering in the back of her mind for a brief moment if a trip or two to the gym before tangling up with Angel wouldn't have been a good idea, her body having been moved, twisted and positioned in ways that it certainly wasn't used to, nor had ever been. Out of the few men she had been with, none of them had ever taken her like this before. At one point her legs were completely straight up against his body it felt like, she was pretty sure if she'd tipped her feet toward each other, her toes could have met behind his head. 

Hell, even just having her legs lazily draped around his waist as he pumped in and out of her could convince her she would be sore in all the right damn ways come tomorrow morning. 

"Oh," she breathed out once their bodies rolled, never breaking contact, and suddenly she was straddling him. "I..." she trailed off, never having been comfortable in such position before with a laundry list of insecurities and lack of even wanting to do any of this in the past. 

As if reading her mind, Angel's large hands slid their way up to the softness of her hips and began easily guiding her movements. His eyes remained locked with hers, her ragged breathing matching his as they moved, his hips starting to counter thrust against her, bouncing her more on top of him each time. 

Once she mentally broke past any concerns she had about being in control and just gave in, her hands pressing against the pillow to either side of his handsome face, or balancing on his broad chest, testing out different angles and speeds of her own, his hands roamed from their place on her hips to explore more of her. 

His hands caressed over her stomach, danced over her ribs, cupped her bouncing breasts together with a light squeeze. Her hips jerked as he teased her nipples, the different sensation taking her by surprise. Her teeth tugged at her lower lip at the sound that her motions created, spurring her on further. And Angel let her explore to her hearts desire, his head burying deeper into the pillow behind him as she continued to ride him, at times copying him from earlier with nearly pulling all of the way off of him before sinking lower in one swift motion, the one time she did actually move away too much and he fell from her depths his arms reached out to her so fast she was sure they would have looked like nothing but a blur, holding her tight as he pulled her back onto his angry rod. 

Buffy couldn't help but moan loudly as his hands remained on her ass, aiding her from that point on with her movements. Her hands gripped tightly to his shoulders, her eyes taking in every single thing about him, the dark look in those hooded eyes, the way his lips parted with each heavy breath. Her heart pounded almost painfully in her chest as her eyes lowered to his scar, the weight of that night and where they were now undeniable, as was that familiar rush of fluttering in her stomach every time she'd let her memory take her back to the before... to that night before everything went to hell and back... what it had been like when she had simply been a girl being introduced to a handsome stranger, how her thoughts had been flirtatious and even had passed a thought or two about maybe winding up with him just like this as some sort of birthday present that night... 

Buffy found herself getting a little too lost in her thoughts, only being pulled out of them when she felt herself tilting, Angel taking back control as her back reached the bed and he closed in over her once more. "You okay?" he had paused to ask. "You're looking a little spaced out there."

Buffy blinked her eyes a few times before nodding her head. "I'm pretty sure I've never felt better in my entire life," she whispered back to him. 

His eyes twinkled at that but he still asked if she was sure and promised her it was okay to pump the brakeson what they were doing if she needed. 

Buffy quickly shook her head side to side, grabbing him and pulling his lips back to hers. "I never want you to stop," she whispered as they broke apart and kissed him again quickly as a big ol' smirk started taking over his face. "I was just... I keep thinking this is all too good to be true I guess. It feels like everything we've both gone through somehow brought us here, and as messed up as it sounds, it kinda makes me view it all differently." 

Feeling himself swell even further, he slowed his movements. "I know what you mean," he whispered leaning down to rest his forehead against hers. His entire being was a blaze, every movement, every touch, it was almost as if they no longer needed words to communicate. He felt her pace increase, heard those soft little pants turning to whimpers, he knew she needed more. Shifting his weight so that he could sit up, his arms curled under her knees as he watched his engorged flesh slip in and out of her hot depths, his heavy balls forcefully slapping against her. 

Buffy's eyes rolled back as a warmth she'd never before experienced began to seep out of her core and spread throughout all of her extremities. "Angel," she moaned through clenched teeth. Her own hands grabbed fistfulls of the comforter and sheets before finally tangling in the pillow behind her, her knuckles quickly turning white from their hold. She felt herself on the edge of the now familiar cliff he'd introduced her too, but this time was different, she was so much higher she felt like if she let go reality might just fade away. 

His groin tightened, that familiar pressure coiled inside of him and he knew that no matter how badly he wanted to stretch this out, it just wasn't going to happen anymore right now. He watched her elbows rise into the air as her hips begun to meet his thrust, driving herself down onto his hard cock with a force they'd yet to experience together. Loosening his grip, he let one of her legs fall as his hand sought the place they were joined, determined to take her with him into the abyss of ecstasy he knew awaited them. 

His long digits rested on her lower abdomen while his thumb snuck back between her slick folds. Her head shook from side to side, she couldn't take it, "It's too much," she cried out, her thighs quaking around him. She was scared to let go, scared to hold on, she wasn't sure what she needed but she was terrified something was wrong and she was doomed to be stuck in this delicious form of torture forever. 

Angel smirked, his thumb slowed but he didn't remove it, instead he circled the swollen nub until she seemed a little less frantic. "Do you want me to stop," he asked again, though in his mind he prayed that she wouldn't say yes, earlier he could have handled it, now he wasn't so sure, though he wasn't sure he was capable of denying her anything at this point either. 

Incapable of words, she reached for him until he fell back over her, her fingers tangled around his neck as their mouths clashed. She couldn't breathe, couldn't speak, completely consumed she lost all sense of reality. Small flickers of light flashed before her eyes and she barely even noticed Angel's thrusts quickening, as her whole body began to shudder beneath him. 

All it took was that first flutter of her inner walls rippling around his angry shaft to send him right over that edge along with her. Quickening his pace, he gave one last long thrust before he felt himself spilling inside her warmth, raising his arms to either side of her soft locks, he tried his best to keep the brunt of his weight from totally squashing her as he rode out those final last waves of bliss. 

OoOoO

Some time later Angel had finally found the strength to pull himself from her depths long enough to toss the condom in the trash bin off to the side of her bed. Her breath still coming in small pants, she curled against his side, tossing one of her legs over him she already missed the feeling of him inside her. 

"You're kinda amazing." 

Angel grinned still trying to catch his breath himself, "Kind of?" 

She tried to shove at his arm, but it was a weak attempt and he easily caught her hand in his, linking their hands he brought her fingers to brush against his lips while he settled back against her, pulling her even closer against him. 

"Any regrets," he asked, his head tilted against the top hers. Never in his life had he been a cuddler, but at that very moment he couldn't imagine not holding her in his arms, hell he couldn't imagine this not lasting forever. 

She'd never felt more relaxed, sweaty, sticky, and hot, yes, but she didn't care, she wasn't sure she could move if she tried. Pillowed against his chest, her head shook softly against him, "It was perfect." 

"It was," Angel agreed, pressing one last kiss to her forehead. He was spent, his arm wrapped tightly against her, he listened to her breathing even out before allowing himself to drift off without a single drop of fear or anxiety coursing through him. 

OoOoO

Buffy woke still wrapped firmly in Angel's arms, judging from the position they fell asleep in she was pretty sure neither of them had moved an inch. Taking a few moments just to bask, she tilted her head back enough to trace the small stubble along his jaw. She wasn't sure what she'd ever done to deserve someone as wonderful as him, but she sure hoped that she never messed this up, lord knew they both had their fair share of demons but for some reason none of them seemed quite as scary when he was around, and she only hoped he felt the same. 

Slowly she attempted to maneuver her way from his grasp and out of the bed, but everytime she tried his grip seemed to tighten. At first she thought he was just reaching for her in his sleep, which he probably had been at first but that slight lopsided smile eventually gave him away. 

"What time is it," he sighed, spinning her around so he could spoon his body behind her. Surely, they still had a few more hours before they had to be up and ready to go. 

"I'm not sure," she grinned feeling his hard length coming to life pressed so intimately against her, rotating her hips she couldn't help but press back against him. 

"Mm, keep that up woman and we won't be leaving this bed."

"Promises, promises," she teased. 

As much as she wanted to take him up on that promise, she could already see the light flickering through her windows, and unfortunately with his unexpected appearance last night she hadn't found the time to pack a single thing. Not that she was complaining, she wouldn't trade the last twelve or so hours for anything, not even the world. 

Somehow one of his large hands found their way back to her breast, which seemed to be one of his new favorite resting spots, brushing his thumb across her nipple, his mouth began to leave a trail of hot kisses down the back of her neck and down her shoulder. He didn't care what time it was, he knew once they met up with his family it would be harder to whisk her off like this and he wanted to soak up as much time with it being just the two of them as he possibly could. "Do you still have to go in for a couple hours?" he asked, knowing she'd mentioned trying to rearrange her schedule with a friend back at the office the other day. 

Buffy had to bite back a moan as his perfect torture continued, her head shaking a little. "Instead of going in I had planned on using the time to pack and shower and make sure I had everything I need, however. That way I would be free during the week to do other important things, you know, like spend hours on the phone with you, assuring my friends and family it will all be okay for me to go running off into the woods with you... things like that."

She could feel the smirk as it slowly graced his face against her skin. "Is that so?" he questioned. Buffy couldn't hold back the moan that came from inside of her as fingers grasped her bare hips under the mess of sheets and blankets piled across them and pulled her body hard against him. Buffy's body arched against him, seeking, craving more, as he whispered in her ear, "Come take a shower with me."

OoOoO

"You can still change your mind, you know," Buffy said softly as Angel wrapped a large, fluffy towel around her damp body. 

His eyebrow cocked upward. "About what?" 

"Me coming along. I mean, technically I have met your parents, your sister, Lindsey... but obviously those situations were quite different than this."

Angel's head tilted to the side after he dropped a quick kiss onto her forehead. "If you don't feel comfortable going then in no way am I going to try and force you to, babe, but if the concern here is simply about that bit of business then you just get all those thoughts out of that pretty little head of yours. I want you to come," he told her. 

Taking in a deep breath then slowly letting it back out, she smiled a little his way. "I guess it's just a little nerve wracking, especially now that the time is actually here."

Getting lost together in nothing but pure desire and need was one way to keep her mind off of those whispering doubts, or falling more in love with him while he had taken such great care and effort to help soap up her body, her hair, and wash all the bubbles back off, how he'd massaged her shoulders and back under the warm spray... as soon as she was back out into the open space of the bathroom and all that was left to do was pack up and go it was like those thoughts all rushed to the surface, but once again he was right there to remove all doubts she was conjuring up. 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Since Angel had done more of the heavy packing, it didn't take her as long to get her own bags ready once she actually got around to just doing it. She made her round of "I'm about to leave" phone calls to the people she cared about most, Angel also did his check ins as they finished up at the house and before she knew it, they were leaving Sunnydale behind together. 

Keeping her hand linked with his, Buffy took over control over the radio the whole way, sometimes singing along at the top of her lungs, other times lowering the volume just so that they could talk, so she could listen to stories of some of the camping days of past. And then, before they knew it, she saw a large sign up ahead telling them they have arrived. Angel pointed out the office, the pool, before going further, stopping along the way to point out other features of the campground as they went. 

A small smile crossed his face as he pointed to the closest marked site to the latest bathrooms and playgrounds he showed her. "Looks like my favorite spot is open but I'll let you get a feel for the place and decide where you want to be," he told her before pulling into a small grassy area to the side. "It circles around down there so we can walk around a bit if you want."

Buffy nodded, a mixture of anxiety and excitement still plaguing her as she stood up out of the car. It took mere moments for her eyes to scan over to a couple down the way taking them in. Coming around, Angel held his hand back out for her to take before they started walking back down the little pathway. 

"Where's Cordelia?" Angel asked as they got closer. 

"Lindsey's meeting ran longer than expected," came the answer, "They just left maybe ten minutes ago." Buffy took back and watched as Angel's mother pulled him into a giant hug quickly, whispering quick questions to make sure he was okay. "Come here, come here," she rushed out to Buffy as they pulled away and Buffy found herself in a tight squeeze next. 

There was barely a moment it felt like from the time his mother stepped back to the one where his father was smiling, giving her a less intense hug next. "Hi," she shyly told them both.

"Hi there, Sweetheart. It is so nice to see you again, and under such different circumstances. You look just as perfect as can be!" his mother exclaimed, taking her hand. "You can come over here and sit with me. We are just about set up, just a few minor touches here and there still needing to be done, the picnic table is all cleaned off if you want something to eat or drink?"

"Actually that would be lovely, we didn't wind up eating before we took off-"

Buffy nearly laughed at the face that crossed her features, spinning and giving a dirty look to her son. "You didn't feed this poor girl before coming all the way out here?"

"I offered!" 

Buffy couldn't help but snicker at the head shake and second round of dirty looks Angel got. Rolling his eyes, he offered to help put the netting and top cover to their tent on while she took a seat at the large red table. "It's so beautiful out here," she commented after saying thank yous for the can of soda and quickly made a plate of different snacks placed before her. 

"Angel will have to take you out exploring if he hasn't already"

Buffy shook her head, "We haven't even picked out a spot yet actually," she said then paused. "I'm sorry there wasn't any real warning about me coming by the way, or, well, asking if you were okay with it."

Waving her off, "This was the best surprise I have had in a very long time. Angel doesn't exactly have a habit or bringing girlfriends around, or, well, having them to begin with... so to say we are delighted to have you is quite an understatement. I couldn't be happier to have you. Maybe when Cordelia arrives she can show you around some while the boys get everything set up."

Buffy nodded, taking a sip from her soda she tried to push down the batch of nerves that threatened to attack. Sure she had spoken to Lindsey and Cordelia several times over the last couple of weeks, but she hadn't seen them, not in person anyway since things between her and Angel had become something more than friends. Even though she was pretty sure they were onto things brewing between them before she even was, it still made her nervous. Hell, who was she kidding there was absolutely nothing about this weekend that didn't have her knots. 

Scooting onto the bench beside her, Angel leaned over, "You okay?" 

She nodded, momentarily forgetting just whose presence they were in, her head tilted slightly as she brushed her lips up against his in an effort to reassure him. Nearly as quick as it happened, she pulled back, her eyes going wide as a noticeable blush crept over her. Daring a look in his mom’s direction, she was relieved to see a small smile playing across her features. Noticing her embarrassment, Angel just chuckled as he slipped an arm around her, pressing his lips against her hair as he wondered for the hundredth time how he had ever managed this life without her. 

OoOoO

Angel's father had pulled him away not too long after they arrived. She wasn't sure exactly where they had run off too but he had promised to be back soon. At first she'd had to bite back the urge to beg him to stay, but soon after he had disappeared she found herself becoming more comfortable not only with her surroundings but with Mrs. Chase as well. 

Angel was right, there were a lot of similarities between their mothers. It had taken her a total of twenty minutes before she started throwing all of the not so subtle hints about babies and weddings, though mostly just babies. She explained how she had pretty much given up hope on Angel ever settling down after the accident, she told her how her hopes for a grandchild had quickly dwindled over the past couple of years. 

Most people would probably be a bit put off by all the baby talk, but she was finding it oddly comforting. Of course her and Angel were miles away from parenthood, but it gave her a boost of confidence to know that any of their possible future children would most certainly be welcomed and wanted. Even with all the pressure from her own mother she'd never really given the idea a whole lot of thought. Before the accident she'd been in one bad relationship after another, the only time children had ever crossed her mind was when she was at the pharmacy filling her prescription for birth control. Then after, she'd all but become a nun once she and her ex broke up, and she'd sworn off all men. 

Now though, with Angel, everything was different, he had opened up her eyes, gave her a view of life she thought only existed in fairytales. He was perfect in every sense of the word, and as much as that thrilled her, it terrified her just the same. Last night was one of the best nights of her life, no question about it, but it was just all the proof of how in over her head she was. 

She wasn't sure she even possessed the ability to tell him no, not that she wanted too, and he definitely hadn't given her any reason not to trust him, but that lingering voice of self doubt was just a part of her she wasn't sure would ever go away. At this point she was fairly certain she loved him more than she would ever love herself, and she just knew if he up and decided to leave one day it would wreck her beyond recognition. 

"Oh look," Mrs. Chase pointed at the Mercedes slowly driving towards them. "Looks like Cordelia and Lindsey finally made it." 

OoOoO 

Angel had known as soon as his dad insisted he tag along, that an interrogation was once again headed his way. It wasn't that his father didn't like Buffy, or anything of the sorts but he was still worried Angel was going to change his mind, revert to his old womanizing ways, and crush his mom's heart all over again. Little did he know as far as he was concerned Buffy was it, he hadn't been sure before, and logically he knew it was insane to think that way what with them having only been back in one another's lives for such a short period of time, but it didn't make the fact any less true. 

Last night, had been something from a dream, he was pretty sure no matter what happened or what the future held, he would remember every second of it for the rest of his life. It was kind of pathetic how difficult he was finding keeping his hands to himself, not just gathering her in his arms and hauling her off away from prying eyes. 

"Hey, lover boy, make sure you stake that corner down, otherwise everyone's gonna know what you and princess there are up to later," Lindsey grinned, pushing one of the metal stakes against his chest. 

Rolling his eyes, he turned and pinned the corner of his and Buffy's tent down. Lindsey was right, but he'd be damned if he gave him any inclination of the matter. They had already managed to get his and Cordy's tent set up down by the water, and the whole time Lindsey was trying to pull details from him, trick him one way or another into giving him some sort of details about just what he and his new "friend" had been up to.

He wasn't budging on that information, partly because he would never betray Buffy like that, but mostly just because he enjoyed how much it annoyed him. He knew if it ever came down to it he could trust Lindsey for advice or anything of that nature, but for now it was fun to irritate him. Though following Lindsey's trail of sight, right about now he was ready to knock that smug look off his face. "Hey asshole, you are dating my sister, remember?"

Lindsey grinned, shielding the sun from his eyes he shot him a wink. "Damn skippy," he smirked, "Doesn't mean I can't take in the sights every once in a while though." 

Angel glowered, sometimes he thought there wasn't a better guy out there for Cordy. Others, like these, he mentally listed all the ways he could kill the fucker and where all he could get away with hiding the body. 

Lindsey rolled his eyes, "Would you freaking relax. It was a joke." Angel knew better, there wasn't a woman out there that was a better match for him than the one and only Cordelia Chase. She understood him in ways no woman ever had before, not that he would ever admit to that outside of the bedroom anyways.

Angel sized him up, "Anybody ever tell you that you're not that funny?" he shot back. 

Lindsey put his drama skills to the test, a hand shooting up to his wounded heart. "Why must you wound me so?" 

"You're going to think wounded here in a moment," Angel threatened. Needing to take a breather from Lindsey before he followed through on his words, Angel looked back over to where Buffy had walked off to and went to go check in with her. 

OoOoO

Buffy smiled as she felt Angel's arms wrap around her from behind just as she finished shoving her clothes back into the bag she had sitting in the front seat. Noting her change into one of her swimsuits, Angel asked if she'd decided to take up the offer from Cordy to go swim while the boys finished up over here. 

"Are you going to come join once you're done?" she asked, turning in his hold so she could face him, arms circling around his neck. 

He nodded before leaning into her. "I'll try not to take too long. Figure once we get everything at least set up with the tents we could take a break and worry about dinner when we get back. If you don't feel comfortable going, though, don't feel like you have to okay?"

She smiled, shaking her head. "I don't, I promise. I mean it's a little nerve wracking still to be here but I think it'd be fun to have some girl time with your sister and your mom after all." She had felt more at ease the more time she spent with them, that was absolutely true, and while she would have happily helped out here it seemed the boys had it under control and a method to their madness that she didn't want to get in the way of, when it was brought up about them just going on back to the office to look at the little store and test out the pool she couldn't say she wasn't interested in tagging along. 

He pulled her even closer, dropping another kiss, this time on the top of her head. "I gotta admit, I miss having you all to myself, especially after the events of last night, but I am so glad you're here with me for this, too," he told her and she felt her heart squeeze a little in her chest. 

"I know what you mean," she whispered back, her head tilting back up so she could look at him. "I promise there's nowhere else I would rather be," she whispered, then shot him a wink. "Besides, you can always have me all to yourself again later tonight, right?"

OoOoO

While she had been getting to know his mother, she hadn't quite had the same chance to make a similar connection with Angel's father yet so when she made her way back over to where their tent was set up and turned the corner to find only him sitting out front, she felt some of those familiar nerves creeping back up. 

"H-hi," she greeted shyly. 

His head turned and quickly a warm smile spread across his face. "Well, hello there. You can have a seat if you want, Mom ran back over to the bathrooms just a few minutes ago. She bought a few new bathing suits, probably the first new ones she'd let me get her in the past decade, and us probably trying them on again," he told her. 

Buffy had blinked at him referring to her as "Mom" to her at first then felt a warmth run through her at the small gesture. She wasn't sure if it was out of habit or for her benefit but either way she thought it was sweet and utterly welcoming. 

"I couldn't tell you where Cordelia is but like I said, you're welcome to have a seat and wait for them to return. I promise I don't bite. Though, I also won't be offended if you're not comfortable with a strange, old man all the same. You've earned more than your fair share of caution around folks."

Buffy smiled softly again at him, thanked him, and took up in the little fold out lawn chair closest to him. "I like your set up," she said, nodding over to the covered gazebo and picnic area he'd been working on earlier. 

"The kids tend to complain it's a little overboard but everyone always enjoys it in the end, may take a little extra time for setting up for just a few days trip but it's worth it." She made small talk about the location before he wound up telling her Angel may have his reasons for thinking their spot was the best but he invited her to come enjoy a coffee in the morning with him to watch the sun rise from theirs before launching into questioning her about her food likes and dislikes to get an idea about some meals they could make over the next few days. 

When they spotted the women finally, he joked with her to not let them convince her walking up there was a good idea. "It's not far but that hill on the main road is not worth the trouble when it comes to walking," he warned, same as Angel had earlier. 

OoOoO

Taking a break, Buffy wrapped a towel around herself and came to sit in one of the loungers beside Mrs. Chase, she noticed her eyes fluttering over to a young woman and her small daughter every now and then and finally got up enough courage to strike up asking her about Cordy and Angel when they were younger, her face seeming to light up as she got lost in some of those old memories. 

"Sounds like they might have been a handful."

"Oh, they were... and trust me, they  _ still are _ . I have come to accept that just might be something neither of them outgrow. It's always something with at least one of them at all times. I think I might worry more about them now as adults though than I did back then," she said with a shake of her head. 

Buffy suddenly felt a twinge of guilt at that comment, knowing it wasn't directed at her or what had happened but that's still where her mind went. It was a topic that had yet to be brought up and kind of felt like an elephant in the room situation if she let her mind wander. 

As if sensing those thoughts, her hand was quickly covered, Angel's mom leaning closer to her. "That goes well beyond the horrifying events you had to endure, I promise." Again, as if sensing her urge to apologize for what had happened on that fateful night, she swallowed hard, "This is going to sound strange and perhaps right now isn't the time for such a conversation but then again when would it be... but, as much as my heart shattered for everything my son had to go through and still struggles with today, from the moment I had seen you... I couldn't help but feel a sense of being thankful for the fact he was there at the same time. I didn't know you but I was but I was glad that you were okay, well as okay as you could have been anyway." 

She didn't get a chance to respond, the next thing she knew a spray of water was flying towards them as Lindsey dove into the pool with a screeching Cordelia in his arms. Strong arms circled her waist pulling her from the lounger she'd been occupying, lifting her feet clear off the ground, he gripped her thighs guiding her legs around his waist but instead of following Lindsey and dive bombing into the water, he captured her lips, using her little squeal of surprise to slide his tongue in her mouth. 

She was pretty sure her face was mirroring that of a tomato by the time they broke apart. Her head buried against his neck, she felt a small sense of relief hearing Mrs. Chase laugh at the whole charade. 

"Sorry," Angel whispered, loosening his hold so that her legs could slip back to the ground. "I couldn't resist," he grinned again. 

"Liam Angelus," his mother chastised, "Let that girl go." 

Angel just shook his head, "Never."

OoOoO

After dinner they all sat around the fire pit, Angel had taken the first opportunity to pull Buffy onto his lap ignoring the snide remarks coming from his sister and Lindsey. 

"So when's the wedding," Cordy chirped from beside them.

Buffy just grinned snuggling deeper against him, they may have been swimming just an hour or so ago, but now that the sun had sight the temperature seemed to have dropped at least twenty degrees. 

"Pshh," Lindsey scoffed, taking a swig of his beer as he stared at Angel out the corner of his eye. "Fucker better not," he warned, Cordy was already riding his ass about a ring, he could only imagine what it would be like if her brother made it to the aisle first. 

"We're eloping," Angel groaned, suddenly remembering just how embarrassing his family could be. He knew they were just trying to get under his skin but it was a little early for all this wedding talk, he didn't mind it so much, but the last thing he needed was them putting some fear or anxiety in her head. 

"Oh a destination wedding," Buffy teased, tilting her head back to look up at him. 

His breath caught in his throat, if he had any doubts before, she had just succeeded in eliminating them with the proof of her ability to hold her own with his family. He wasn't sure why he was so surprised, he knew she was perfect in every sense of the word, but despite all of that in the back of his mind he'd still been a tiny bit concerned about this weekend and how it would turn out, and in that exact moment it took everything within him not to tell her exactly how he felt. 

"Hey," Buffy whispered, once most of the attention had turned away from them. "You okay?" 

He nodded, easing his hold on her a bit, "You're perfect, you know that?" 

Her chest squeezed, "So you keep saying." 

OoOoO

It seemed like it took forever but after the traditional roasting of smores he was finally able to tell everyone goodnight and pull Buffy away with him. After everything last night, the hours spent with his family seemed achingly long. He loved them, each of them had their own special way of driving him absolutely insane, but he loved them nonetheless, and as happy as he was to be sharing all of this with her, a small part of him couldn't help but regret ever coming out here in the first damn place. He'd been forced to spend entirely too much damn time away from her today and he had every intention of making every minute of it up tonight. 

While she was at the pool earlier he'd taken a little extra time to set everything. Some may scoff at his idea of  _ camping  _ but what could he say, he was Cordelia Chase's brother. Just because he enjoyed the great outdoors, didn't mean that he liked to rough it. Along with the double layer air mattress, he'd also set up one of those miniature portable air conditioners, but judging from the temperature outside he doubted there would be a need for it, not tonight at least. 

Coming up behind her, his mouth dropped to the back of her neck, "Want me to show you the showers?" 

Tilting her head to give him better access, she let her eyes fall closed for a second, "Mmm, only if you can take one with me." 

It was as though she had read his mind, it would take some finesse, but it was late enough now that he was fairly sure they could get away with it without being caught. Though first they had to make it there, which was proving especially difficult. Spinning in his arms, her fingers laced around his neck pulling him down so she could nibble on his lip. 

His hands roamed her soft curves, he was about half a second away from forgetting all about their need for anything else. He'd just begun to venture beneath the poor excuse for a dress when she pulled back, "I should probably get my stuff together if we're gonna go." 

He nodded, he'd already thrown together a shower bag earlier, but he hadn't wanted to go through her things so he'd left her suitcases off to the side. He brushed his lips against hers one more time, "Just grab some clothes," he motioned to the small black duffel bag, "I've got the towels, shampoos and such ready to go." 

OoOoO

He was beyond grateful for the private showers, they still had a chance of getting caught if someone happened to see them walking in or out of the restroom together, but it was dark and as long as they didn't get spotted by some kid he couldn't really bring himself to care. Especially not with the way her tiny hands were currently wrapped around his cock. 

She watched his eyes darken and felt him guiding her back towards the wall. A small hiss escaped her when her back finally made contact with the cold tiles causing him to pause. Capturing her lips, he couldn't help but silently thank the stars one more time for putting her back in his life. Breaking away, his head tilted to rest atop hers. "I missed you today," he whispered just loud enough to be heard over the pour of the shower. 

Yes, she'd been here all day, but she knew what he meant. The whole day once they got here had gone by in one giant blur, she felt like she blinked and it was dark again. "Your mom's sweet." 

Angel grumbled, "Ya well, I'm not letting her steal you away again tomorrow." 

Her arms came to rest around his neck, he already had a small tan line from the tank top he'd worn today. Jumping up her legs locked around his strong waist, she grinned, "Now don't tell me your mother didn't ever teach you to share." 

Angel smirked, "Not one of the qualities I'm known for." 

"Angel?"

"Yes, my love?" he asked. Her eyes widened a bit and her cheeks had certainly pinked a little over the choice of words there. 

Continuing to hold one arm around his neck, her other reached around to toy with a few wet strands on his hair, lowering down to run along the ridge of his eyebrow. "Thank you... for all of this, inviting me to come along with you this weekend and meeting your family and, well, everything."

"Well, I don't know whether to warn you that we do still have the whole weekend to still manage to get through... so your feelings may change by the end of this little trip, or to just tell you that there's more of a need for me to thank you for coming along because I don't think I could have survived being away from you this weekend."

"Uh huh."

"Yep. And, also, fair warning that I am pretty sure they have already started trying to work out details for a next time so you might want to be prepared for that."

"You're already talking about a next time... and... wanting me to tag along?" she asked.

His lips pressed into hers quickly. "Every time," he whispered a moment later. "I want you here with me every time here on out," he told her. 

Buffy felt her heart swell and a rush of emotions hit her with full force. There was no question that Angel made her happier than she could ever remember being and he, himself, had already provided her with an endless supply of things she had given up on years ago and she'd come to terms the best that she could manage that a relationship with someone was simply just out of the question before he returned to her life but being here was proving to be all that and a box of chocolates. 

Almost all of her nerves had slipped off to the wayside by now, Angel's parents having simply made her feel at home with them, welcomed, and already as if she were part of the family. Cordelia seemed like she had mostly come to terms with their relationship as well, though her approach to that was coming from a completely different planet than theirs. 

She tried to not let her thoughts get too far ahead of themselves but more than once today she had thought this is exactly what she had dreamed of once upon a time, a perfect boy to fall into her life, a sister to have a love/hate relationship with, in laws who weren't the monsters portrayed so often but rather loving, accepting, supportive people. She'd loved all the stories and memories being shared today and silently prayed she could be in some of those future stories being told and laughed over in the future. 

As Angel's body pressed harder into hers, his lips abandoning hers to taste down the side of her neck, all thoughts of his family and anyone other than him burst like a bubble in her head and then there was just him. 

Just them.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

The shower was soon filled with the mixed scents of Buffy's shampoo and her body wash as Angel took great care to lather across her slick skin, his far too talented fingers worked to loosen any tense muscles in her neck and shoulders, gently ran down the length of her back side until he was toying with the small of her back. When she turned around to face him, her head tilted back slightly to help wash off the shampoo from her long strands of wet hair as he massaged her scalp, laughing as he tipped her back even further, kissing her under the middle of the shower spray. 

Soapy suds slid down her body, Angel's dark eyes taking in the sight before reaching back out for the small pink bottle, filling his palm with more of the pink tinted liquid. Buffy's teeth caught her bottom lip as he ran his warm hands over her chest, sides, stomach, and up to her breasts that were aching for his touch... though not for long, the dark room soon filling with the sound of her soft moans as he teased her. 

Buffy closed her eyes as warm water fell over her, getting lost in the feeling of Angel's fingertips toying with her nipples, lightly punching the pointed peaks, flicking his thumb softly back and forth across them until she was digging fingernails into his skin... when suddenly she was pushed backwards against the wall, the rush of nothing but cool air popping her eyes right back open. 

Angel's body made up for the brief coldness however, blanketing against her quickly, his lips pressing hard into hers. Using his shoulders for some leverage, she hopped up with his assist, wrapping her legs back around him. "You're endlessly perfect," she heard him whisper into her ear. 

OoOoO

Having forced him into changing positions with her, Buffy started to repeat his motions from earlier, lathering up his dark hair, bursting out into laughter though when she had to have him bend down closer to her so she could make sure she got everywhere. "Sometimes you're just too tall, just so you know."

Angel chuckled, popping a quick kiss. "I think it's more you're just so tiny... but trust me, there's absolutely no complaints on you being fun sized," he said with a wink, making her blush. 

Shaking her head, she rinsed the leftover shampoo from her hands and switched bottles, briefly debating about grabbing her own body wash and soap to pour all over him. Taking care, Buffy started to cover him in thick bubbles starting with his neck, down to his shoulders and arms. Buffy's small hands rested against his chest, slowly tracing down the scar from the night forever binding the two of them together, her eyes meeting his as she dipped even lower, her fingertips taking hold of his hardness. 

Buffy took a step closer to him, lifting herself up slightly to meet him again, her hand working him lazily root to tip as he kissed her slowly but passionately. 

When they did break away, he was panting slightly as he braced himself better against the wall. Feeling that warm tingle taking over between her own legs, she began to wonder who she was really getting worked up here briefly before tugging him closer, bringing him back under the water to finally wash off. 

Finally increasing her pace as she continued to jerk him off, Angel growled out her name, his eyes still closed as the water rained down over the two of them, only sending a further rush of need through her entire body. 

More than once today she had been reminded of their actions from last night and this morning, usually at inappropriate times of thinking about how she missed him while he was off with someone else briefly, and remembering in great detail exactly how he felt inside of her and how she longed for more. While she was grateful to be here, it was a little unfair with how badly she wanted him to just be locked in a bed somewhere. Feeling him swell inside her palm, a sense of pride flooded through her, she didn't think she would ever get tired of knowing she had the ability to control him in this way. 

His eyes rolling back, he reached down, wrapping his hand around her wrist he gently tugged until she released his hard flesh. Ignoring her pout, he pinned her arms above her, "Stop that," he grinned, teasing her lips. It wasn't that he wanted her to stop, but it was getting to the point that if she didn't, there wasn't going to be any turning back, and as badly as he wanted to slide into her hot depths and take her right here and now, after all their hours apart he wanted to take his time, to worship her the way she deserved. 

Forcing himself to break away before he lost the last bits of control he was somehow managing to hold onto, he stepped away and quickly adjusted the nobs until the water above eventually fizzled out. Grabbing one of the towels, he wrapped it around her, using it to pull her back up against him, even those few seconds a part being too much. 

His hard length pressed against her belly, "We should probably get dressed," he murmured, his lip pressing against her wet air. 

Her bottom lip stuck out in that pout he loved so much, "Maybe I don't wanna," she teased. 

Angel smirked, stepping back so he could finish securing the towel around her. "Patience, beautiful." 

"Not one of my known qualities," she grinned once again flipping his own words around against him. 

Feeling especially brazen, she didn't even get him the chance to respond, dropping to her knees, she nearly laughed at the shocked expression he was wearing as she glanced up from her new position. Gripping him firmly, she guided his swollen head between her warm lips, darting her tongue out she teased the mushroom tip circling his engorged flesh before relaxing her throat as she took in as much of as was physically possible. 

He groaned her name, though she wasn't sure if it was in warning or a plea. Squeezing her own thighs together, it still amazed her just how much it turned her own to bring him pleasure. Slowly releasing him, she used her hand to grip his base, moving her hand in unison, she set a steady rhythm that soon had him grasping her hair, her arms, seemingly anything he could get hands on. 

Before she knew what was happening strong arms were pulling her up, her feel clear off the floor, she gasped when his lips captured hers. That warm tingle had grown into a raging inferno, and all she could think about was the need she felt to have him inside her again. "Take me to bed," she quietly demanded, gently nipping at the smooth skin below his ear. 

That was something he was pretty sure she would never ever have to tell him twice. His cock angry and throbbing, twitched at her words, "We need clothes," he grumbled, never more grateful that he'd been able to snag a location so close to the showers. All he could think about, all he could imagine was being inside of her and despite all of his lessons, his self control these last few weeks, he was just about ready to snap. Hell, he was pretty sure he needed her more than he needed air at this point, and that told him everything he needed to know. 

OoOoO

Somehow he'd managed to get enough clothes on to make it the short distance back to their tent without getting cited for indecent exposure. Still his arms held her close as they made their way back, partly because he just couldn't get enough of her but mostly to mask the raging hard on he was sporting, the grey sweats he'd chosen only seeming to accentuate his condition. 

Buffy giggled the entire way back, finding the entire situation far too amusing. Of course she had done nothing to help, every time he'd just about had himself under control, she would do one thing or another until he was mere seconds away from letting go of all his standards and taking her in the damn public bathroom. 

Once safely back inside their tent, Angel waist no time tossing the small bag containing all their supplies for the shower off to the side. Spinning her around, he pulled her down to the makeshift bed easily rolling her beneath him. Feeling her legs come up around him, he pressed his angry manhood against her warmth as he absolutely went to work devouring her. Having foregone a shirt all together, he could feel her pebbled points rubbing against his chest, the only barrier between them, the thin material of the t-shirt she wore. 

His hands bunching under the fabric, he made quick work of pulling it over her head, breaking away from her just long enough to rid her of the garment. Scooting down her body, his palms returned to the soft mounds, his mouth quickly following leaving a trail of hot kisses in their wake before latching on to one of her sensitive peaks. 

Her hips bucked below him, in their short time together she'd never seen Angel this desperate, this needy. Her heart clenched once again at the thought that just maybe he really was in this just as deeply as she found herself. Feeling him abandon one breast, she gulped in a breath of air when he simply traded one for the other. 

His patience vanishing quickly, he felt possessed, making his way further down, he nipped and sucked a path down her belly, hooking his thumb in the small shorts she'd chosen, he wasted no time ridding them from her body. Forever grateful she'd foregone panties, his arms slipped beneath her thighs, holding her tightly his tongue dove between her folds. Showing her no mercy, he worked her with purpose, circling her clit, he alternated rolling the hard bud between his teeth, and soothing it with slow long flicks. 

Her back arched from the mattress, unlike all of their previous couplings, this time was different. Where before it had been a slow exploration, it was clear that this time he was moving with purpose. Feeling that familiar rush, she gripped his hair and tugged until he finally looked up, confusion swirling behind his eyes. "I-I," she gasped, "I need you inside me," and in that moment she did, more than she had ever needed anything in this life. 

Not one to deny her, he climbed back up her soft curves leaving random kisses along his way. Reaching into the bag beside their bed he blindly rummaged around, searching for the box of condoms. 

"Shit." 

Pulling away from her questioning eyes, he leaned over just enough to actually be able to see inside the bag and that was when the memory hit him. He'd pulled the new box of condoms out from under his sink with the intent of throwing them in the bag, they hadn't taken that step yet, but he'd wanted to take the precaution just in case. The problem was his phone had rang and the image of the damn box sitting on the counter sat clear in his mind. 

He must have made some sort of noise because from beneath him he heard her asking if something was wrong. Resting his head on top hers, he shook his head, "We might have a problem." 

"What is it," she asked, her eyes briefly widening with worry. 

He couldn't fucking believe this, of all people he knew to be prepared, and of course the one time he wasn't he was here with her, in the middle of freaking no where, where the only store for miles had been closed for over an hour. Possibilities raced through his mind, at this point he wasn't above asking Lindsey, but him and Cordy had been together for years, and he highly doubted they were still relying on the cursed piece of fucking rubber. 

He groaned, "I may have forgot the condoms."

"Oh." Well that was definitely a problem, especially since he'd told her not to worry about them this morning when she'd been packing. He cursed once more and quickly told her how they had wound up in such a situation despite his best efforts and perfectly good track record about these kind of situations, mentioning to her that the closest store he could even guess at being open would be a hell of a drive at this time of night. Buffy's breathing slowed and he was a little muffled as he muttered he could try to go search the car, then after a quick rush of different arguments played around in her brain, she blinked hard, her hands tugging at his neck, guiding his lips back to hers.

When they broke away, her eyes slowly lifted to meet his. "I want you," she whispered, afraid to voice such words any louder.

In what tiny bit of light that filtered around them, she watched his eyes darken even further, his forehead creasing, his lips trying to form the right way to pose the question dancing across his face. 

Buffy knew to not stop things now, to not break the mood and send him off for some, somewhere, or to just sit in unfulfillment until probably sometime the following day was being reckless, the risks of having unprotected sex screaming at her from inside her head, any number of possibilities worrying her to the core... but despite all of that, she wanted him, needed him, right now. 

Slipping one of her small hands between their bodies, her legs spread just a tad further as she guided the tip of him to her entrance, her eyes never leaving his. 

Angel's whole body seemed to shudder as he came in contact with proof of her desire to be with him. "That's a hell of a risk, Buffy," his hot breath whispered. 

"I know," she whispered back, her legs wrapping securely around him. 

OoOoO

Angel's hips pressed forward, sounds of pleasure from the new contact filling the air around them inside the tent, and it felt like he had been sucker punched as soon as he filled her completely. Buffy said his name in a panted whisper, her eyes closed tightly, fingertips digging into his back and into his arm. And as abstract, detailed, and fresh his memories of being in this very position with her a number of hours ago, he had to admit actually feeling her around him didn't even compare. 

Buffy's eyes opened and she gasped as he started to move again, slowly pulling back before thrusting forward again. He ate up every moan that fell from Buffy's lips, how she cried for more as he moved in and out of her, pulling out until just the tip of his cock remained before bottoming as much as was physically possible inside of her all over again. 

As much as he knew he would have loved to turn tonight, given its unusual circumstances especially, into a marathon of making love to her... but his attempts to even tease her with switching between long, lazy stokes and moving with reckless abandon seemed to be shoving him toward that cliff into ecstasy right along with her. 

One of her ankles fell from its place hooked around him as they moved, Her knee bent beside him, foot pressing hard into the mattress under her as she did her best to steady herself to match his movements. "Don't stop," she practically begged and he was almost convinced he wouldn't be able to even if he wanted to when it came to her. 

Slightly moving his position, his hips continued to rock against her as his thumb sought out her neglected bundle of nerves. One of her small hands tried to wrap around his wrist, the nails creating little half moons everywhere on his skin as he pressed firm circles against her. 

Buffy's entire body suddenly seemed to buck up against him, her legs clamping tightly around him, as did her inner walls. "Milk you for all your worth" easily had a new meaning in that moment, feeling himself lose what tiny bit of control he was grasping desperately to, but the second she sensed him trying to pull away, unsure if he would even pull out of her in time or not, her grip on him only increased and she whispered for him to kiss her. 

Thrusting back into her one last time, his lips met hers with punishing force as he came inside of her heat, refusing to pull away from her until he was seeing spots and desperate for air. Buffy's chest heaved up and down against him as she gasped desperately to refill her lungs with much needed oxygen but all movements seemed to cease without warning when he blurted the confession he had been dying to tell her for weeks now, "You are perfect and I am absolutely in love with you," he panted out to her. "I never want to be without you again, I don't think I could survive in this world after knowing what it is like to be with you if I couldn't be anymore. And maybe that is crazy and too fast and whatever else... but I'm in love with you and I needed you to know that."

OoOoO

Cuddled up against Angel's warm body, one hand cradled under her cheek while the other rested against his chest, Buffy took a deep breath before looking up at him. "Angel?" 

"Hmm?" he asked, his eyes remaining closed until she repeated his name, then they opened with a hint of worry to them. 

Swallowing hard, she gave him a hint of a smile. "I-I love you," she whispered. Earlier she'd wanted to tell him her feelings were the same as his but she had been so shocked and overwhelmed in the moment that nothing had come out. If he had been bothered by the fact he certainly hadn't let on but she kept replaying it over and over in her own mind, one reason being the utter joy of hearing those words from him, having confirmation in yet another way that she wasn't imagining this to be more than it was between them, but also wishing she had said a million things back to him in that moment had plagued her, too. 

"I know we have only been back in one anothers' lives for a short while but in all the cliched ways, Angel, I feel like I've known you my whole life and us being apart was some big piece of me missing that I just got back. And that I'm me again, that I'm a whole person again, with a chance at everything I let go of and thought wasn't in the cards for me. You make me happier than I have ever been and however happy I may be in the future will partially all rely on you without question. I want to be with you... for however long the fates allow, because I am in love with you, too."

His face softened, those brown eyes twinkling, and a smile that reminded her of a kid on Christmas morning getting that one perfect gift took over his entire face once she had said her own peace about the subject finally. In one swift movement, he tugged her close enough to capture her lips all over again. The fatigue that had settled over him, suddenly replaced with a yearning only she could ease. 

OoOoO

She woke just as the sky was beginning to lighten, the dark black clouds giving way to a heavy blue. Angel was spooned behind her, his strong arm holding her, snuggling further into his embrace she couldn't help but let out a contented sigh. He sure had a way of coming into her life and flipping everything on its head, twice now he'd saved her, and if given the option she planned to spend every second of the rest of her life loving him for it. 

She felt him begin to stir behind her, she was pretty sure after their little admissions to one another last night he'd made it his personal mission to reacquaint himself with every inch of her being. They'd made love no less than four times throughout the night and honestly she was a little surprised she managed to wake up so early, but she did have a date to keep after all. 

"Where you going," Angel mumbled, pulling closer when she started to inch away. His lips almost instantly finding their way to the back of her neck where he immediately started to leave a trail of warm kisses. As much as he loved having her here with his family, it hadn't even been a full twenty-four hours and he was already counting down the minutes to having her alone in his bed for a few days. 

Tilting her head she let herself get lost in the feel of him for a few moments. Her body positively ached, but for once it was in all the right places, "Mmm. I've got a date," she teased, her hand finding his beneath the blanket, she lightly ran her fingers over the curve of his knuckles. Crawling up her side, he wasted no time cupping one of her mounds, his thumb and forefinger softly rolling and tugging one of her sensitive peaks. 

"A date," he echoed, and she nodded.

"Mmhmm," she grinned. 

All of his movements paused, "With who," he managed, though worry was evident in the tone of his voice. 

Letting out a long sigh, she guided his fingers back to her abandoned breast. "Older man, met him yesterday, pretty sure he likes it when you call him Dad." 

He was pretty sure all the air escaped him as just what she was saying sank in. "What the old man con you into this early," In all honesty there was no telling what he'd managed to convince her to do, his father was the definition of an early riser. Hell, knowing him he'd probably already been up for at least an hour. When he was younger he used to wonder how someone couldn't function on such little sleep, not only did his dad normally get up by four am, he usually didn't turn in for bed till well past ten. 

It wasn't until after the accident when the nightmares began and his own sleep schedule became such a mess did he really start to get it. Over the years he'd learned that his father was like him in a lot of ways, or rather he was like his father in the sense that they couldn't stand the still. At least not when they were alone, that was when their minds went into overdrive, that was when they lost control of themselves. 

"Hmm, he promised me the most beautiful sunrise I've ever seen, plus coffee," she grinned. 

OoOoO

It had taken some work but she had finally managed to convince Angel to let her up so she could get dressed. He was already dozing by the time she leaned down to kiss him, and remind him that he still needed to run to the store at some point. They were reckless last night, and even though she didn't regret it, she definitely didn't want to tempt the fates too much. "Love you," he'd whispered, still half asleep, and her heart soared all over again. " I love you too," she promised him softly, not able to resist touching her lips to his one last time. 

All the worries and doubts that she'd let sneak back up on her the day before seemed to have vanished with their declarations. Everything in her life felt like it was finally falling into place, it was perfect, and that both thrilled and terrified her all the same. It was so perfect, she had honestly considered pinching herself a time or two, these last few days especially. Good things like this didn't happen to her, and if they did there always seemed to be some sort of catch that came along and messed things up. 

Lacing her sneakers, she looked back through the thin nylon to the man sleeping with a pillow curled up beside where she had been minutes before. She trusted him more than life itself, that she was sure, she knew Angel would never do anything to intentionally hurt her, it wasn't him that she was worried about, even if her insecurities got the best of her sometimes. No, she was far more worried about her own self doing something to mess this up, obviously her track record when it came to relationships wasn't the best, and she just hoped she could be as good to him as he was to her. 

Dusting her backside off, she stood once again, there was just enough light out now that she could make her way without a flashlight, which she was glad for. There was something about the dark and not being able to see that still gave her the wiggins, not to mention this whole camping thing was still new to her, and even though Angel had been right and they were far from stuck out in the middle of nowhere, she couldn't shake the idea that a bear or some other wildlife might just sneak up on her. 

As she approached his parents campground she smiled, as usual Angel had been right. His Dad had obviously been up for a while, there was already the startings of a new campfire, and the smell of freshly cooked back wafted through the air. As she drew closer she could just make the faintest of tunes being hummed from somewhere around the tent, she also spotted two coffee cups and what looked to be some sort of travel coffee pot set up on an up turned log. 

She let out a small sigh of relief that he had remembered and she wasn't here making some giant fool of herself. She felt like she made a lot of strides getting to know his parents yesterday, but all in all, there was only so much you could get to know someone in a day. 

"Well good morning there sunshine," Mr. Chase smiled as he rounded the corner, extra firewood in hand. "I was starting to wonder if you were going to make it," he pointed his free hand in the general direction of their own campsites, "You know those kids of mine could learn a thing or two from you." Buffy smiled, offering to help but he waved her off. "No, no, I got this. You go ahead and take a seat and start thinking of what you just might want for breakfast this morning. We can try and relax a bit before moving on to that bit of business though."

Buffy cuddled up in the chair, using the mug to keep her hands warm as she watched him. She couldn't help but smile as she noticed the smallest things seemed to remind her of Angel as he moved about. 

Brushing his hands off when he stood back up, she watched his head turn back toward her and Angel's tent and he squinted a bit. "He may wake up and grow concerned over you not being there."

"Nah, he briefly woke up when I was moving around and I told him I was coming out here to meet you."

"And he fell back asleep?" She nodded. "Well, that sounds about right. Kids certainly got more of their sleeping habits from their mother, she's in there sleeping like a log," he said with a smile. "Now, if you want any sugar, creamer or anything for that coffee there's a cooler just off to the left of you."

"Thank you. I think I need as much caffeine as I can get this morning."

"You not sleep well?" he asked, coming around to sit beside her. 

She did everything possible not to break out beat red. "I think I had more of an issue actually falling asleep," she covered, "Sometimes it's hard to get relaxed in a new place and all. Plus, I'm sure excitement over everything having a play in it."

OoOoO

"Well, isn't this a nice surprise," he said as Angel's mother stepped out from the tent. She had to admit she had loved the view, the sunset, and just hanging out since with his dad. "I was fairly certain I would have to enlist all the kids to bang on pots and pans to get you up when we were all ready to eat or something."

Mrs. Chase shook her head at him, zipping the tent back up behind her. "Not all of us enjoy being up before the sun, my dear," she smiled over to Buffy. "Good morning, Buffy." Buffy smiled and Mr. Chase offered a cup of coffee. "Mmm, when I return from the bathroom," she said, rubbing her eyes. 

As she walked off, Buffy adjusted the flannel throw blanket she'd been given earlier so she could curl her legs up under her while he grabbed an extra chair to set up beside them. "You and Angel have any big plans for today?"

"Not that I am aware of, just popping into a store at some point or another to grab a few things."

"Mom always tries to gather everyone up for some big adventure at some point on these trips but I don't think she's settled on a day or an evening for that just yet. Last time we all went and did karaoke and I don't recommend anything dealing with that again."

Buffy giggled trying to imagine how that all played out while he went on about some of their other recent adventures before Mrs. Chase returned, settling in beside her husband. 

"We were just discussing some of our greatest hits and misses around here."

"If we were all staying longer I'd happily show you around to some of our favorites," she told Buffy. "Perhaps next time? I was thinking the boys at least might enjoy that new zipline and ropes course they built not far from here, or there's that showboat we always say we're going to try out and never do."

"Lindsey mentioned those jet boats last night."

"I don't think they have opened for the season yet though. I'll have to look it up, and see if any of the new shows might be interesting, too. We might have to start expanding our area if more doesn't wind up being built out this way sooner than intended."

He patted her leg, "I'm sure we can all agree upon something," he said, turning his attention back to Buffy, telling her different stories of previous camping adventures with the kids. 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

"Wait. So Cordelia and Lindsey  _ met  _ here?"

Mr. Chase shook his head, "Their paths had crossed briefly before I think a time or two because of Angel and him working together but they didn't start dating until they both happened to be here," he corrected. "Cordelia wasn't even supposed to come with us that week but... well, I forget even what happened but she wound up here and Lindsey was actually here with someone else at the time."

"Oh," Buffy said, her eyes widening. 

"He wasn't serious with the girl but he had come out here with her so he didn't have a way home other than calling a cab or something so we took pity on the kid. He still didn't know too many people out here since his move so... When he wanted to get away from her, we took him in."

"He and Cordelia were relentlessly just teasing the hell out of one another," Mrs. Chase smiled, remembering. "I'll be honest, he's not her usual type but I'm pretty sure that works in his favor. They've proven to be rather perfect for one another."

Buffy reached to put her now empty mug up, declining another refill, and settled back in her chair, asking how the two of them met and she sat utterly intrigued as they both weaved in and out of the story together about how ever since he was a young teen he would try his hand over the summers at different trades or jobs and one particular summer he wound up delivering packages, how she had worked out at a large animal clinic out in the middle of nowhere, how his route seemed to always have him arriving when she was off on her lunch break and how he never put the packages in their designated spot in the office, always on her desk until one day when he was running late...

"And they have been arguing around slight inconveniences ever since," came from behind them. Buffy laughed as she turned her head to face him, her heart lurching up to her throat at his sleepy looking appearance. "You should hear about the parking disaster of the night I was born," he joked. "And all about how I was almost delivered right there in the parking lot."

"Good morning, Angel," his mother drawled. 

"Mother," he answered with a cheesy smile. "I was hoping I'd be walking down here to some eggs and bacon or something."

"I've yet to start cooking, unsure of how long it'd be until at least some of you would be awake."

"Uh huh. Well when you're ready I can help I suppose."

"Did you sleep alright?" 

She and Angel shared a brief look. "More or less. I did wake up without my girl beside me though so that's been a downward turn so far."

"Oh please. She's been having much more fun with us anyway. I'm starting to worry you may smother the poor girl with how close of an eye you seem to keep on her."

Buffy blushed, but he payed his mothers teasing no mind. Tugging on Buffy's hand he pulled her from her seat, quickly spinning them around he sat in her place and pulled her right back down onto his lap. 

"Feel free to hose him off dear," Mr. Chase told her as he carefully sat a fresh cup of coffee within his son's reach. 

At his father's words Angel's arms slipped beneath the small blanket to tighten around her, "Want me to run back and grab your sweater?" 

"Nah," she grinned, shifting around a bit so she was sitting across his lap. "I'm sure the chill will be gone soon enough." 

OoOoO

All hell broke out once Cordelia and Lindsey joined them. After breakfast they had all sat around discussing what their big adventure for the weekend should be. Cordelia wanted four wheelers, Lindsey wouldn't shut the fuck up about zip lining for no reason other than he was trying to kiss their mothers ass, since she had been the one to suggest it. Angel kept trying to suggest they rent a few jet skis, meanwhile Buffy sat quietly off to the side with his dad who kept reassuring her that this was perfectly normal. 

After watching them all go back and forth for a while she felt Mr. Chase gently nudging her side, "Just say you want to go do the zip lines, otherwise we're going to be here all day, plus it'll make Mom feel good to have the both of you on her side." 

Buffy grinned, here she was worried that her and Angel's dad might not get along, what with her whole hang up on men, and especially since she never really had a real relationship with her own dad, not since she was a kid anyway. It made her heart do funny things to know how much she was actually enjoying his company, she could totally imagine the two of them teaming up against all the others. 

"Actually, zip lining sounds kinda fun." 

All of them froze, none of them being quite used to having a deciding party around. Mrs. Chase’s cheeks almost instantly spread into a wide smile, Lindsey just started laughing as he slapped Angel on the shoulder "I think you found yourself a keeper," he quickly told Angel who looked a bit confused that she hadn't sided with him, Cordelia the least impressed with the situation simply rolled her eyes, "Well would you look at that, a decision before noon," she quipped. 

OoOoO

She was quickly learning that it wasn't just Angel that had the ability to pull her out of her comfort zone, Apparently the trait was genetic. Never in her wildest dreams did she ever imagine she would agree to be doing something so daring. At first she'd just assumed it was some miniature version of a zip line, after all she hadn't exactly seen anyone sailing over their heads since they had been here or when they drove in. However the further they made their way up the side of the mountain the more her stomach tightened. 

Sensing her begin to panic Angel draped an arm around her, pulling her closer to his side, "We can just wait at the top with Dad," he suggested softly, "He'll say he needs to drive the car back down, but they have guides for that, truth is he's always been scared of heights."

She shook her head, scared or not there was no way she was backing out now. Her mother might tell you that was one of her biggest faults, never listening to that voice inside her screaming this was a terrible idea. "I'll be fine," she promised, though even she could hear the tremble in her voice. 

"Uh huh, well if it gets to be too much just let me know okay, don't let Lindsey or anyone else pressure you into anything." 

She couldn't help but grin, Lindsey was clearly head over heels for his sister and yet she couldn't help but sense a little jealousy brewing where he was concerned. Tilting her head back a bit, she slowly raised her hand to trace along the side of his brow, getting a little more lost in the moment than she'd intended, the next thing she knew his mouth was fused with hers. It wasn't the deepest kiss, and it was over practically as quickly as it started, but they were still in the back of his parent's suv, and she couldn't help the way she just knew her face was flushing. 

OoOoO

By the time they had made it to the spot on the mountain side to pull over and park, Buffy was feeling a little better about the whole experience. Hearing stories of Lindsey nearly vomiting the first he'd gone had certainly helped to ease her nerves, not because he had been scared but because to hear Cordelia tell she thought he was the biggest freaking cry baby to ever exist, and that meant that Cordy thought it was no big deal, and Buffy silently swore that if Cordelia Chase could do something then there was absolutely nothing for her to be worried about. Not that Cordy wasn't brave or whatever, but she was definitely more high maintenance than she considered herself, and there was just no way under any circumstance would she ever be able to live with herself knowing Cordy of all people had more guts than she did. 

Angel helped to get her all situated in the harness, then continued to hover as the operator double checked his work. They were going tandem, which he was glad, Buffy's nerves may have been the ones showing, but that was only because he had so much experience keeping his in check. It wasn't himself that he was worried about, not only had he rode these zip lines himself dozens of times before, he watched everyone from Lindsey to his mother do the same. They weren't her though, and apart from the irrational fear that something catastrophic could happen and send her careening to her death on the rocky ground, he was also a little worried she might panic. 

"Hey," she smiled, draping her arms around his neck while they waited for the attendant to hook their harnesses up to the cable. "I love you." 

His fingers looped through the cables on her hips to pull her closer. Sometimes he was utterly amazed by her ability to say just what he needed to hear, "I love you more," he promised, leaning down, taking the opportunity to get lost in her a few seconds. 

The sound of someone clearing their throat had them breaking away, and Angel couldn't help but roll his eyes at the look on Cordy's face, there was absolutely no question in his mind that she'd just overheard their quiet confessions. Taking the walkie talkie she held out in front of her, he secured it to one of the climbing hooks on his side, "It's just a precaution,” Angel started tell her just before they were all interrupted by another voice talking loudly to gather their attention to go over the last of the group instructions and to explain if they wanted to do the new adventure ropes course how they could get to it once this part of the journey was completed.

Splitting back up into their different rows so that they could go at the same time, Buffy found her hands shaking as she gripped the little bar in front of her. She barely noticed the man to the side of her quickly making sure she was all safe and secure one final time, only hearing bits and pieces of his instructions on what to do once they were given the go ahead. 

"You're gonna be fine," Angel called out to her and she smiled nervously back at him, nodding her head. 

When the time came for her to go, and she was just starting to fall away from the safety of the wooden ledge, she felt like she couldn't breathe at first, her mind screaming several times over that she hated everything about what was happening... Angel seemed to sense it, yelling over to her again. He yelled at her to look over to the side, giving her something to focus on, and from there it seemed to only get better. 

She was terrified, yes, but there was something thrilling about it, too... and she found she kind of liked that. She was so used to be terrified for all the wrong reasons, this kind of energy being negative excitement and negative adrenaline coursing through her, but this was all together a different experience. 

Halfway through, she closed her eyes, and found peace for a short while. It was truly a beautiful sight, and she was pretty proud of herself for going through with this. 

All the same, as they reached the other side, she was back to shaking, and being glad she'd done it, but also very glad it was done and over with, too. 

OoOoO

Deciding she'd done enough extremes for the day, when they did make it over to the small ropes area, she was glad they all decided to test the easier one out first and save the bigger, badder one for another time. That said, it wasn't any walk in the park either and she'd nearly fallen a handful of times... unsure if each of those missteps had scared her or Angel more. 

Cordelia had wound up hanging upside down at one point when she did in fact miss a jump, but she was quite impressed with Angel's mom and how fearless she seemed to be. Age was certainly just a number where she was concerned. 

Once all was said and done, they went to go check out some of the official pictures that had been snapped along the way, then she found herself being dragged off to the surprisingly large gift shop. "Alright, everyone go pick out a tee shirt or at least something or another you can wear, and then something else you want to take back home with you," called out Angel's mom.

"Woman has never met a souvenir that she didn't like," she heard. Mr. Chase whisper to her just as he was coming around the side of her. They shared a smile before he told her to go pick something out. 

Looking back to Angel she started to tell him no one needed to buy her anything, if anything else she could purchase something herself, hell that she should be getting them all something for allowing her to come but he quickly shut all of those ideas down. "It's tradition, and it makes them happy. My whole life I'm pretty sure everywhere we went we had to get at least something with a name of said place on it somewhere."

Her mind flashed back to a number of tee shirts he'd worn in their time together with various places splashed across them or other ones she'd spotted in his collection, and the various little trinkets he had in his house here and there. She sighed and let him lead her around, grousing every time he showed her something that it was too much. 

"Alright, well if you don't pick something out then I will," he warned, his finger pointing off to the side. 

Following the invisible line, her face flushed as she spotted the small display of boycut underwear advertising this place. "Your parents are one hundred percent not buying me any of those!" she whispered harshly at him and he dodged her hand as she tried swatting at him. 

By the end of it, she wound up with a shirt and a matching necklace and earring set despite any of her further protests. 

Everyone was practically starving by the time they checked out, so a quick stop through a drive thru was in order, Mr. Chase joking that the lot of them needed a shower before he wanted to be seen out in public with any of them.

OoOoO

After getting cleaned up, Buffy figured she better do a quick check in with those back in Sunnydale, promising to give more details about the trip once she was home but assuring everyone that she was safe and having a good time out here. Just as she was telling her mother she missed her and loved her, she stepped back out of the tent, her eyes searching until she spotted Angel, Cordelia and Lindsey over by the playground close to the bathrooms. 

Shaking her head, she managed to get out her goodbyes and promise to check in soon, she zipped the tent back up and went to go see what in the world they were doing. 

Before she could ask, Angel's arms wrapped around her, his mouth landing on hers. She could feel him smiling as he pulled away. "And tag, you're it!"

Buffy's mouth hung open a little as she watched him pulled away with a wink, Lindsey laughing from up on the walkway between some of the slides. "Well, that's just unfair!" she said, earning a chuckle from Angel as well before she started running toward him. 

She was pretty sure she hadn't been on a playground once since she was a young teenager and it certainly showed. She laughed so much her sides and face hurt as she ran around with the three of them, going down twirling slides and climbing up the small rock wall at one side of the whole large structure, sliding down the fireman type pole. 

Lindsey tried to convince her to walk over to the dual seesaws just a short distance from where they were but she easily declined, pretty sure she could foresee how that would end. Even Cordelia told him she knew better than to tempt fate over there, with him. "I have enough memories from elementary school and those things falling out of the sky and busting my ass when I landed to last a lifetime, thank you."

"Oh, you're no damn fun!" he told the both of them and then she and Cordy propped themselves up on swings when Angel agreed to go. They watched as each of the boys purposely tried to slam the other to the ground. 

"He seems so happy," Cordelia softly whispered.

Buffy smiled, "You mean he's not always like that?"

"Not Lindsey, I was talking about Angel duh." She rolled her eyes, "Of course Lindsey is happy he has me. Angel on the other hand," she sighed, "It's been a long time since I saw him like this, and I guess I have you to thank for it."

She wasn't sure she would ever get used to Cordelia's way with words and how she could seemingly go from insulting someone to praising them in the same breath. "Oh I didn't do anything," she started but Cordelia cut her off. 

"Oh please, my brother is so head over heels in love with you It's nauseating." Seeing Buffy blush she pressed on, "Don't act like you aren't aware either, I heard the two of you earlier before we went down the zip line. Ya know in my whole life, before Sunnydale, before that freaking horrendous night, I have never heard him tell anyone other than our parents and me on very rare occasions that he loved them. Angel's not," she trailed of trying to think of the right words. "He's not like that Buffy, not usually. He doesn't fall in love, hell he doesn't even fall in to like very often. Not only does not wear his heart on sleeve that boy keeps it tucked away inside a barbed wire cage. I'm not sure how you managed it or what tricks you have up that sleeve of yours but I feel like I wouldn't be being a good sister if I didn't ask you to be careful."

Forcing down the lump in her throat she'd just been about to respond when a pair of strong arms wrapped around her from behind. She had been so focused on Cordy and what she was saying that she hadn't even noticed the abandoned seesaw. Looking back over in the direction they had just been she saw Lindsey doubled over.

"What the hell did you do," Cordelia shrieked, smacking her brother in the shoulder. 

Angel just shrugged as he touched his lips to the side of Buffy's hair, "I won," he grinned. 

OoOoO

After dinner when they were all sitting back around the campfire roasting marshmallows Lindsey seemed to still be walking around with a limp. Angel kept laughing at him, and everytime his mother and Cordelia would shoot him a dirty look. 

"Paybacks a bitch mother fucker, and don't you forget it." Taking a seat next to where Buffy was all wrapped safely in the assholes arms, his shifted his attention to her. "I sure hope kids aren't on your radar cause when I'm through with him…" Cordelia promptly smacked the back of his head. 

"Oww," he grumbled "What was that for?"

Angel tuned them out choosing instead to focus on the girl in his arms. Wrapping his arms a little tighter around her, he pulled her back enough to whisper in her ear, "That reminds me, we should probably check out the store down the road before they close." 

She couldn't help but feel a small rush at the memory, she hadn't really had time to think about it with the craziness of the day. They had been reckless but she just couldn't bring herself to stress out or regret a moment of what had happened. 

"What's that I hear about my future grandchildren?" 

Buffy tried the best she could to positively melt against Angel, turning her face about as far as she could against him, to the point where she hoped to not even be seen. She knew his mom was joking of course but man could her timing not have been worse. 

"Hey, I am fully passing that responsibility over to him," Cordy motioned toward the two of them shaking her head, "Do you have any idea how much work I put in for this body, no thank you." 

His mom just laughed in the way that Buffy was quickly coming to realize meant she was not joking at all. "Oh hush, Buffy and Angel just met, you can't go putting all that responsibility on them. They've got at least six months before I start hounding," she laughed, shooting her son a quick wink. 

Angel faked a yawn, "Well would you look at the time," he grinned her way, "I think I hear the bed calling out name." 

Feeling him shift around, Buffy moved the blanket from around them so she could stand and let him up. 

"Oh sit your rear back down," came his father's voice from behind them, but Angel just shook his head, draping his arms around Buffy to pull her closer. "Sorry pops can't do that, apparently we have some practicing to do." 

If she hadn't been the freaking color of a damn tomato before she definitely was now. She loved his family, she really really did, but man did they have a way putting her on the spot sometimes. Trying her best to hide any sign of embarrassment, she quickly thanked them, again, for the day and gave her own round of hugs. 

OoOoO

"Sorry about that," Angel chuckled once they were out of earshot. The little store wasn't too far so they'd decided to just walk the small trail instead of driving. "I'm pretty sure that's all she keeps us around for, well Cordy at least, I think they gave up any hope of some rugrat coming from me a while ago." 

"You don't want kids," she asked, linking their fingers together. Children had never really been something on her radar either, then after the incident and everything happened she'd pretty much sworn off men all together. Now that he was a part of her life though she felt all those doors she'd locked shut slowly starting to open again. She was miles away from wanting a baby of course, but for possibly the first time in all her life the thought that they may get to that point one day didn't send her into a full blown panic attack. 

Angel's grip tightened on her hand, tugging her a bit he stopped in his tracks so he could pull her to him. "Honestly," he blew out a deep breath, "I've never really given it too much thought. If someone would have asked me before I met you Buffy then that answer would have been a resounding NO, but with you everything's different. I love you Buffy, with all that I am, and like I said last night I know in some ways that probably sounds crazy but I don't care. You have changed my life in ways I didn't think possible, I want everything with you. As far as I'm concerned I want my life to be with you because you are my life, and whether or not that future includes little mini versions of us running around doesn't matter. All that matters to me is you, and that you're happy and safe, and most importantly that you know that there isn't anything I wouldn't do for you no matter what." 

She could feel her emotions getting bigger than her body as his words sunk in, as her rushing thoughts reminded her of just how different her life had become all over again since he became this giant, new part of it, how she had so recently been simply used to being alone and understanding as well as accepting that she would never have exactly everything he had been offering to her this entire time. Angel held her even closer as her heart squeezed and raced, as she let out a shaky breath, trying hard to fight off stinging tears threatening to come. Angel's arms tightened around her, one hand rubbing down her back as he whispered he loved her once more, and also asking to make sure she was alright. 

Nodding against him, they just stayed linked up together for a few more moments before pulling back apart enough to resume walking hand in hand, her mind remained heavy though. There was no denying that this weekend felt like another one of those mountains of a moment where everything shifted to the point nothing would be the same afterward. She didn't know exactly what all that would bring on but she couldn't wait to see what just might come next. 

After assuring Angel for probably the fourth time that he hadn't managed to scare her off with his latest of confessions, he did change the subject away from the idea of them having children or not to much lighter tales about some of he and his family's trips out here as they got further down the path. 

OoOoO

Buffy joined back up with Angel inside the store after making a quick check in call to her mom, easily amusing herself with some of the random novelties set up while Angel found what they'd come here for, doing everything possible not to blush when he went from grabbing just one small box to then adding two more and shooting a wink her way. Whatever plans he had brewing in that little mind of his she doubted she would ever be able to find any sort of fault in. 

Grabbing them each a long neck bottle of old time soft drinks from the shelf then filling up little bags of various bulk candy set up near the check out counter, she scanned the small store for anything else that might look appealing for in the moment. Poking Angel on the shoulder after he was done at the check out counter, she pointed over to a little photo booth in the corner before he asked the teenager working if it was in order before dragging her that way as she shoveled a handful of chocolate into her mouth. Turned out it wasn't working after all once they tried but she didn't mind the other set of memories they quickly made otherwise in here.

Of course this only helped to make their journey back to camp and being back in the confides of their tent feel impossibly long, as fun and as perfect as the entire day had been, she wouldn't have taken issue up with having spent the entire day in their either. 

Thankfully, and also not so given he reminded them of their plans, Cordy and their mother passed them by as they were heading toward the bathrooms to bid them goodnight again so they could have the rest of the evening to themselves. She was pretty sure if anyone was destined to die from embarrassment it was bound to be her and at some point along this trip if he kept this up. 

Whatever concerns she had about the fact his family were all still awake out there and knew what they were up to in here still only lasted so long while he was doing delicious things to her body. By the time she was bent over in front of him, fingers curled up in blankets as he entered her, she really didn't care who knew, saw, or heard what as long as he didn't stop.

OoOoO

Safe and sound, tucked into Angel's warm body, absolutely sure there was no way she could go another round with him anytime soon and survive it... though there was no denying that would be her preferred way to go if it came down to it. Her body was absolutely spent, her eyes barely able to stay open any longer, and it didn't take long for her to simply give up on trying. 

"I wish we could just stay like this forever," she whispered sleepily. 

His lips pressed against her forehead once then twice. "You and me both, Beautiful. I have no idea how I'm going to pack us up at the end of this little holiday and return to work and bustling around when all I want to be wrapped up with your sexy little ass. I'm just trying to ignore any of those thoughts the best I can and enjoy everything for now I guess."

Nodding, she wasn't sure what if anything either of them might have said after that point, already passing out off into dreamland. 


End file.
